Does "No Contact" really work?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

...
But I am going to NOT call..

NOT text...

NOT chat...

And NOT blow it like all the other guys and she is going to wonder what the hell I am doing.

Thanks for approaching it like a man!

 

[Mr. Me]

Ugnh... You guys are acting like a bunch of girls... You're planning for the worse by retreating, very masculine.

That's your spin on it. But if "retreat" is how you see it, even the best Generals know when to retreat. That doesn't make them less masculine, it means they know when to use that strategy.

I don't see it as retreat, I see it as not walking into a possible ambush where you're derailed from your aim of having one on one time with a new girl. I have my good reasons of why I don't want a group interfering on the first few dates. I already gave some valid reasons.

I think handling a monkey wrench thrown at you with confidence, humor, grace and ease, not letting them see you sweat, is a masculine high character trait. Not too many men can do that. Instead they become demanding or aggressive or pout or hurl insults like babies.

His wise father answers "No son, lets walk down there and fvck all of them."

Obviously, I'm not talking about gaming all the girlfriends. The first date is not to entertain girlfriends.

Do women flake on you often?

No. Thanks for asking.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

..Obviously, I'm not talking about gaming all the girlfriends. The first date is not to entertain girlfriends.

Let's see, the friends like you there's a better chance of the girl liking you for multiple reasons. Plus what better way to have a bunch of women focused on you at one time not to mention it widens your selection pool. And that would be a bad thing because????

..
No. Thanks for asking.

Ahh, so that's how walking away works for you. You flake on her before she gets to flake on you!

 

[My Name is Nobody]

Hey guys,

Just got back from the coffee thing. It wasn't bad she is cool and we'll go out again I can tell.

Still thinking about the girl from last night though.

Should I contact her at all today? She called me when she got home last night and let me know she got there and I slipped and said we should get together today and she said "that would be nice".

The AFC in me would love to call her and get together again but that's a mistake right?

Do you usually call girls the day after sex or what? I always used too but now I don't know. Maybe I should just send a text.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Hey guys,

Just got back from the coffee thing. It wasn't bad she is cool and we'll go out again I can tell.

Still thinking about the girl from last night though.

Should I contact her at all today? She called me when she got home last night and let me know she got there and I slipped and said we should get together today and she said "that would be nice".

The AFC in me would love to call her and get together again but that's a mistake right?

Do you usually call girls the day after sex or what? I always used too but now I don't know. Maybe I should just send a text.

I'm going to hold my tongue because what works goes against what most most guys believes to be what's right.

 

[My Name is Nobody]

Interesting. I am leaning towards just sending a text. I don't think 1 text message is bad. It's when I start having convos via text that is very bad.

Got any ideas on a good message I can send?

 

[reset]

"I enjoyed having sex with you. I'd like to get together later and have more sex."

Would that work?

 

[My Name is Nobody]

LOL, that's a possibility I'd like to make it a little less crude and more funny and clever though.

 

[reset]

Oh FINE, do it your way man.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

LOL, that's a possibility I'd like to make it a little less crude and more funny and clever though.

Oh please don't...

 

[My Name is Nobody]

Oh please don't...

Well I feel I need to do something I don't want to call and she thinks I'm clingy or whatever. Then I don't contact her I'm a jerk.

I CANNOT blow this, I will beat myself up forever if I do.

 

[reset]

But if you send something won't she think you're clingy anyway? Can't you wait a few days?

It would be more fun for me personally if she sent me a text instead.

Of course I'm out of the game for the time being. Don't take my advice.

 

[My Name is Nobody]

But if you send something won't she think you're clingy anyway? Can't you wait a few days?

It would be more fun for me personally if she sent me a text instead.

Of course I'm out of the game for the time being. Don't take my advice.

Well the thing is when she called me last night after she got home I said we should "get together" again today and she said she wanted too. But I never said I would call.

If I don't contact her now I am not a man of my word.


Think about this; she is used to dating broke AFC college guys how hard can this be?

 

[reset]

Well if she's crazy about you then forget to call her, and then call her a few days later acting like you forgot what you said last night. She'll think you were drunk when you said it and therefore not as needy as she may have perceived when you said you wanted to see her next day, it was the booze talking.

She'll wonder what happened in the mean time and wonder if she's really that special to you afterall and she'll go nuts trying to earn your affection.

But again, I'm just posting for the hell of it. Don't do what I say.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

...I CANNOT blow this, I will beat myself up forever if I do.

'Ya think?!!

 

[My Name is Nobody]

Well if she's crazy about you then forget to call her, and then call her a few days later acting like you forgot what you said last night. She'll think you were drunk when you said it and therefore not as needy as she may have perceived when you said you wanted to see her next day, it was the booze talking.

She'll wonder what happened in the mean time and wonder if she's really that special to you afterall and she'll go nuts trying to earn your affection.

But again, I'm just posting for the hell of it. Don't do what I say.

Actually that makes ALOT of good sense and I am now leaning on not contacting her.

I think my brian is trying to convince itself to contact her because I like her, but I'm still not sure.

Then again I could text her, she could be home bored and come over for another session.

ARRGH I'm torn. A text is a good way to test the waters. Just 1 funny text that's all I'm asking for guys!!

 

[Mr. Me]

multiple reasons. Plus what better way to have a bunch of women focused on you at one time not to mention it widens your selection pool. And that would be a bad thing because????[/quote]

Because there are many pitfalls and they out weigh the benefits. I already explained several of the drawbacks on page 15. Personally, I think it's smarter strategy to meet the friends after you've gotten a few dates in and the girl is crazy for you, because then if one of her friends is a c*ckblocker (I'm sure you appreciate that women can be c*ckblockers for many diverse reasons), then she's more likely not to be affected by her friend's opinion and more likely to defend you than buy into it because she's gotten sold on you. But you need to get those first few dates in there to get her there, and you can't be distracted by having to entertain her friends.

I don't see how walking into a situation that has many pitfalls and then having to do your pony act if things turn south is such a smart thing. Ounce of prevention's worth a pound of cure. To use your military analogy, meeti9ng her friends and dealing with whatever happens if it goers badly before she's more into you is like charging directly into "Battle Friends" when actually first you want to establish "Bulkhead Woman".

Ahh, so that's how walking away works for you. You flake on her before she gets to flake on you!

I don't have to stay in situations I don't want: I make a date, it's with me and her, not me and her showing up with her little brother, her kids or her girlfriends or whatever. If I stay, that's an implicit agreement that I'm willing to accept her changed terms and conditions to the date. That's not being a flake. Agreeing to the changes for the sake of keeping the date on is what AFCs do. I say, DJs walk when a woman changes the plans like that.

 

[Mr. Me]

Well I feel I need to do something

That's your problem right there.

You "Feel" like you need to do something. The truth is, you don't need to do anything.

Right now, just like you're dwelling on it, she's probably dwelling on it. She's thinking how great it was to meet a guy like you. How hot the sex was. She's wondering if you're going to call again. She's wondering when you'll call. She's wondering if you're thinking about her. She's wondering why you haven't called, she's wondering if she's done something wrong? She's wondering if maybe she said something wrong or if she should've instead done this or done that and...

And that's just what you want, her mind on you. Let it stew awhile. Let her savor it and the anticipation. This is how women's minds work. Mark this on your calendar: "Call her Thursday."

 

[My Name is Nobody]

That's your problem right there.

You "Feel" like you need to do something. The truth is, you don't need to do anything.

Right now, just like you're dwelling on it, she's probably dwelling on it. She's thinking how great it was to meet a guy like you. How hot the sex was. She's wondering if you're going to call again. She's wondering when you'll call. She's wondering if you're thinking about her. She's wondering why you haven't called, she's wondering if she's done something wrong? She's wondering if maybe she said something wrong or if she should've instead done this or done that and...

And that's just what you want, her mind on you. Let it stew awhile. Let her savor it and the anticipation. This is how women's minds work. Mark this on your calendar: "Call her Thursday."

You've taken this approach before? Tell me an instance not calling for 4 days after sex worked. Anyone tell me some stories. I have NEVER waited that long to call a girl that I like after sex. I have always called the next day. And it has led to LTR's and that's what I was seeking at the time.

And I wouldn't mind one with this woman either she is cool as hell. I didn't see ANY red flags at all.

Is this the AFC in me talking?

Someone give me a reason to keep spinning if you find a woman you really are into.

 

[reset]

And that's just what you want, her mind on you. Let it stew awhile. Let her savor it and the anticipation. This is how women's minds work. Mark this on your calendar: "Call her Thursday."

I agree with this. Women love to sit around and ponder and wonder and analyze every little thing you do or didn't do or why you did or didn't do it... it's drama but in this sense the drama actually works in your favor. They live for that stuff. And just the fact that you may actually feel a little needy, but aren't reacting to that neediness, it really doesn't matter---because she'll already have had all that time to build up in her mind that you're a confident guy and there's more to your life than her, otherwise why aren't you calling? What are you doing? Who are you with? Are you thinking of her?

Lol. The problem we as guys can have is when we do that.

Everytime I've followed Mr. Me's strategy it's worked, everytime it hasn't I've gotten burned. The same thing would have happened with the crazy girl. Their own drama works on them so hard that you can make it so they actually do all the work.

No I'm not the guy who's getting laid right now.... but this is just how women's minds work when they have interest in you. The less of you they have the more they want. I think you're too worried about getting more sex that you could sabatoge it.