"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Do you pay on first dates?

Doc Dogg

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My first dates never cost money. They always consist of meeting a girl for 30 mins just after lunch at somewhere like the front of a museum or something, then a walk through a park for a chat. In those 30 mins I decide if I want a second date. If I do I usually make it after dinner and make it a walk along the beach or a drive into the hills to a look out for yet another chat and a kiss at the end. 3rd date I usually cook something with the girl, more chatting, a kiss and either a good night bj or sex. Grand total $15 :D
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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J Roc

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you shouldn't be spending any money on a woman on a first date. you barely know anything about her so why waste your hard earned money on her.
 

SandHawk

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WaterTiger: That's mainly the reason (for me) you're a pretty bad advice in this case. I'm only 27, and I usually date girls at least 3 years younger than me, and when I run into one of them being like you, I'll slam the eject button whether I'm wearing a parachute or not.

On topic: As said before, first dates should be cheap and short to gauge interest. You don't want to be stuck for ages with someone. I completely agree with Kailex' list of activities. Over here, we also have the Hortus Botanicus, pretty gardens with you can roam freely. Score take away coffee, and walk around in there, talking. Provides some good subjects to talk about as well.

On paying for the date: I usually split the bill. Most girls my age insist on paying for themselves because they're afraid it implies something when I pay. However, even if they don't, I still suggest we split the costs. I usually score the coffee beforehand, and while paying for it, I just tell her next round is on her. This implies I get another cup of coffee, and in case I want to eject early on, I lost 3 euros max.

Seriously, if you're creative, a first date doesn't have to be expensive or the same old lame **** all the other guys do. Yes, most guys take a girl out to dinner/movie, so doing that is repeating the same old sh*t.
 
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does everybody remember the ending to the movie Aladdin? When Jaffar wanted ALL the power in the world, and wished to be a Genie.......and while he thought he'd be getting just the ultimate power, he was WRONG, because with all the good that comes with being a Genie, the BAD comes with it too!! - and as a result he was confined to a small lamp (a consequence of being a Genie that he did not expect!!)

Well, the same applies to feminism!! They wanted equality? GOOD NOW YOU ARE EQUAL, BUT WITH THE POSITIVES YOU GET THE NEGATIVES TOO!!

There is no way in HELL I ever pay for women on 1st 2nd or 3rd dates - I see them as equal, and I do not want to demean everything that women have been fighting for the last 50 years by paying for them.

I don't appreciate the idiotic hypocrisy in this thread........a guy is not REQUIRED to fvcking pay for a complete stranger, especially a stranger who is his equal according to the feminist movement that was shoved down everyone's throat.

The only $$ I ever spend on dates is for the condoms i'll be wearing when i'm fvcking them, and the cheap (but effective) wine that I give them to get them drunk and horny.

LIVE AND LEARN, DON'T BE A PVSSY!!!
 

ali-g

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A bit bitter.

The unattractive overweight woman doesn't get the peanut. She gets upset.

On whether or not to pay, I really think it depends.

I would agree that a first date should be cheap.

I mean, I think there's something to be said for the rapport you've built with this girl. I wouldn't say you can have a rule for every situation.

It almost seems adversarial, whether or not you pay. If a woman rushes to judgement because you haven't grabbed her tab, but--with all other things considered--the date went well, then maybe tell her to go fvck herself.

Honestly, for me, when on a first date, the end goal really affects the way I behave--to an extent. Believe me, you can judge potential long term material fairly easily--if you know what you're looking for. If you're just shooting to bang, which becomes the case more often than not, I guess it really depends on your GAME more than anything. Paying for something won't get you pvssy, unless you're paying for pvssy; an oxymoron? In the end, even if it works, you're still paying for pvssy.

The point being this: if your game isn't on par, it really doesn't matter if you pay or not. It just doesn't matter.

If your decision to pay--as I mentioned above--really resonates with her more than how much she wants to bang you, you've done something wrong (and it's not whether you paid or not).

All that being said, I mentioned a case where it's someone you think you might want to keep. The exact same argument applies, right? Do you want to pay for pvssy all your life?

It's more about _why_ you're paying for it. If you are paying because it's custom, tradition, or you're too big of a pvssy not to, maybe think about what you want out of the situation.

If you can't coax them into your bed, you can definitely pay them. A girl with money won't respect you, and a girl without money will suck you dry--literally and figuratively.

Cheers.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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i love it how every single time I speak the logical, sexual truth, i get called bitter, it is like the CODE WORD for shaming by guys who are too pvssified to see the light.........this place is overrun with manginas
 

The Juan and only

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I agree with Rescue. However it always (of course) depends on the situation.
 

Donnie Darko

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Rescue Mission...how do you address the fact that you expect the woman to pay her share on the first, second or third dates. I don't disagree with your philosophy at all but I sometimes encounter a situation where the woman does not offer to split the bill and I end up paying. In the US there are some women that just flat out expect the guy to pay for everything and sometimes you don't figure this out until after you are going out with the girl.

I don't typically take girls out to restaurants but tend to grab a drink or a coffee. If things are going well, then we might split an appetizer at the bar.
 

WORKEROUTER

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Lol yes the appetizer splitting at the bar is fantastic esp. if you're dealing with a broad who expects you to pay (which BTW is not an instant out!)...you just gotta train them right :)

What I do is tell her I grabbed food at a business dinner and just am not that hungry...but let's get a small bite and drinks.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Donnie Darko said:
Rescue Mission...how do you address the fact that you expect the woman to pay her share on the first, second or third dates. I don't disagree with your philosophy at all but I sometimes encounter a situation where the woman does not offer to split the bill and I end up paying. In the US there are some women that just flat out expect the guy to pay for everything and sometimes you don't figure this out until after you are going out with the girl.

I don't typically take girls out to restaurants but tend to grab a drink or a coffee. If things are going well, then we might split an appetizer at the bar.
#1 - Don't go out on dates in the first place - always invite her over to hang out and drink, MOST chicks love doing just that - hanging out and drinking.........and unlike a date, hanging out and drinking, when coupled with physical attraction, usually leads to sex!!

#2 - If you have made a mistake, and are actually on a 1st date with a new woman, make sure to NEVER have this date involve food - NO FOOD EVER!!! NO DINNER, NO LUNCH, AND NO MIDNIGHT STOP AT THE IHOP AFTER DRINKS AT A BAR!! Eating food with a new woman is the #1 guaranteed way to NOT have sex that night........hell even I myself find a hard time getting horny when I'm full........having a satisfying meal makes me kind of sleepy and ready to fall asleep!

#3 - if you DO take a 1st date to dinner/lunch/anything food related, then you are just a chump, an AFC, a typical boring useless walking wallet, and you don't even deserve advice - instead, you deserve to be used for your money, and you SHOULD and WILL pay for the meal, because there is no easy way to get a bytch who is looking for a free meal to pay her way.

NO FOOD FOR DATES - damn, I thought this place is called sosuave?? Isn't this common knowledge???
 
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