"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

do you pay on date?

jardine

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 11, 2004
Messages
17
Reaction score
0
on a first date, do you pay or suggest a 50/50 split? And if you go to pay and she offers to split, do you say youve got it or just go along with it? This is not refering to her insisting, but just a casual offer of splitting the bill. And does her reaction have anything to do with interest level?
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

sfalexi

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 12, 2004
Messages
381
Reaction score
0
Age
44
Location
NJ
I offer to pay. If she wants to split it (and it's going well), I say, "I'll tell you what. This ones on me, the next one'll be on you." Therefor insuring a second date. And when you call her up, remind her that this one's on her, and immediately afterward suggest that you go to a fancy restaurant that you know (name one near you that she'll KNOW is pricey). Should get a laugh and a 'no way' out of her.

Alexi
 

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,481
Reaction score
65
Location
Galt's Gulch
Why go someplace where this would be a concern. It's a first date. You're not in a relationship with this woman, hell you don't even know if there's going to be a second date.

If you feel you MUST pay, just go someplace to have coffee. Before anybody starts flaming, consider this; why go someplace elaborate? She is supposed to be impressed with YOU, not where you go or what you buy.

Unless you have low interpersonal skills or don't mind hooking up with a woman who's more into where you take her, don't try to impress her with just the venue. Yes, ambiance does make a difference, but you don't have to break the bank for it, especially for someone you just met.
 

Abbott

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 2, 2002
Messages
895
Reaction score
0
Location
St. Louis Area
Do this:
A) Do the split.
B) Go somewhere cheap.

That's what I would do. But then again, I'm cheap when it comes to spending money on others (except when I have a son, but I don't yet so....).

At the very least, do task B.

Ben
 

anonuser78

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 20, 2004
Messages
17
Reaction score
0
you pay unless she absolutely insists, if it is a 'real' date, she shouldn't have a problem. If she really wants to pay, tell her she can pay the tip. that way u don't look like a cheapass
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Top