"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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do you pay on date?

jardine

Don Juan
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on a first date, do you pay or suggest a 50/50 split? And if you go to pay and she offers to split, do you say youve got it or just go along with it? This is not refering to her insisting, but just a casual offer of splitting the bill. And does her reaction have anything to do with interest level?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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sfalexi

Senior Don Juan
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I offer to pay. If she wants to split it (and it's going well), I say, "I'll tell you what. This ones on me, the next one'll be on you." Therefor insuring a second date. And when you call her up, remind her that this one's on her, and immediately afterward suggest that you go to a fancy restaurant that you know (name one near you that she'll KNOW is pricey). Should get a laugh and a 'no way' out of her.

Alexi
 

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
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Why go someplace where this would be a concern. It's a first date. You're not in a relationship with this woman, hell you don't even know if there's going to be a second date.

If you feel you MUST pay, just go someplace to have coffee. Before anybody starts flaming, consider this; why go someplace elaborate? She is supposed to be impressed with YOU, not where you go or what you buy.

Unless you have low interpersonal skills or don't mind hooking up with a woman who's more into where you take her, don't try to impress her with just the venue. Yes, ambiance does make a difference, but you don't have to break the bank for it, especially for someone you just met.
 

Abbott

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Do this:
A) Do the split.
B) Go somewhere cheap.

That's what I would do. But then again, I'm cheap when it comes to spending money on others (except when I have a son, but I don't yet so....).

At the very least, do task B.

Ben
 

anonuser78

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you pay unless she absolutely insists, if it is a 'real' date, she shouldn't have a problem. If she really wants to pay, tell her she can pay the tip. that way u don't look like a cheapass
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

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