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Do You Get Butt Hurt By Flakes?

soulforge

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I normally wouldn't give a fuk if a chick flaked on me... However the last 6-7 months have been insane.

In mid March I became seriously ill with Covid19 & at that time I was spinning two plates.. I ended up dropping both plates, as I could not hook up with them due to poor health.

I pretty much recovered in September with is around 7 months of serious illness.. Since then I have found the dating game is dead on its arse.

I seem to get numbers online, however when it comes to actually meeting up, girls seem to back out.. Which didn't used to be the case before covid.

So currently this is abit of a dry patch for me..

I started seeing a sloot from work around a month ago.. However she flaked on me twice & for the last few days I have been pretty pissed about it.

I know I shouldn't let it effect me & just move on to another chick.

However this covid situation is making meeting girls extremely difficult.. And this is why A flake is pizzing me off, more than it usually would do.

This girl is from my workplace & I can't avoid seeing her a couple of times a week.
 

BackInTheGame78

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I almost never get flaked on and I date OLD almost exclusively. You seem to be pressing and these women can pick up on it. You are giving off bad vibes. You don't realize it but that is the way it works sometimes...

Just relax and have fun. Don't worry about the outcomes. The sex will always come when you are fun and you make women feel good when they are around you. Nothing is different from 7 months ago other than the way you are approaching things.
 
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soulforge

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I almost never get flaked on and I date OLD almost exclusively. You seem to be pressing and these women can pick up on it. You are giving off bad vibes. You don't realize it but that is the way it works sometimes...

Just relax and have fun. Don't worry about the outcomes. The sex will always come when you are fun and you make women feel good when they are around you. Nothing is different from 7 months ago other than the way you are approaching things.
You could be right about that man.. I suppose I pushing for a date pretty early on into the conversation.. Maybe after 2-3 days of talk, I usually get down to meeting up talk.

Are you suggesting develop conversation over a longer period?
 

EyeOnThePrize

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I get that vibe from you too, like your diicks going to explode if you don't get some pu$sy asap.

My flake rate is practically zero because chicks sense confidence and the IDGAF in my messages. Not to toot my own horn but I've had plenty of girls tell me in bed that they sensed my BDE from the moment we started chatting.

It's like that young bull and old bull story. In case you haven't heard it:

Two bulls are grazing up on a hill. As they're eating, a large heard of cows wanders into the pasture below.

The young bull turns to the old bull and says "hey look at those cows down there! Let's run down there and fuuck one of them!"

The old bull looks up and says "Naw. Let's walk down there and fuuck em all."

When you're chill and not in a rush chicks just sense something is different about you. Then they're curious and want to find out what it is. Of course there's chicks that have been so inundated with cucks that they're jaded, but any kind of entitled behavior kills my boner so I guess I naturally avoid those types. Sometimes I get them too, but only when they come to me. I never bother trying to convince a chick to do anything.

I just chat until it's obvious she wants some, then I suggest something she's been dying to hear. Or touch her or whatever feels sexiest in the moment.

It all boils back to facilitating that effortless king like aura. Practice it, then really embrace it and live it.
 

soulforge

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I get that vibe from you too, like your diicks going to explode if you don't get some pu$sy asap.

My flake rate is practically zero because chicks sense confidence and the IDGAF in my messages. Not to toot my own horn but I've had plenty of girls tell me in bed that they sensed my BDE from the moment we started chatting.

It's like that young bull and old bull story. In case you haven't heard it:

Two bulls are grazing up on a hill. As they're eating, a large heard of cows wanders into the pasture below.

The young bull turns to the old bull and says "hey look at those cows down there! Let's run down there and fuuck one of them!"

The old bull looks up and says "Naw. Let's walk down there and fuuck em all."

When you're chill and not in a rush chicks just sense something is different about you. Then they're curious and want to find out what it is. Of course there's chicks that have been so inundated with cucks that they're jaded, but any kind of entitled behavior kills my boner so I guess I naturally avoid those types. Sometimes I get them too, but only when they come to me. I never bother trying to convince a chick to do anything.

I just chat until it's obvious she wants some, then I suggest something she's been dying to hear. Or touch her or whatever feels sexiest in the moment.

It all boils back to facilitating that effortless king like aura. Practice it, then really embrace it and live it.

Yeh I have to admit, with my online game, I have kinda been pushing it a little..

I generally try to fix a date within a few days of talking.. Maybe try to build some banter and flirting first then ask for a date later.

What about if you are already having fun with some chick?

What is the harm in simply sending her a message once a week to arrange a date or sex session.. Haha.. I don't think that is being desperate.
 

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Romanemp22

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You could be right about that man.. I suppose I pushing for a date pretty early on into the conversation.. Maybe after 2-3 days of talk, I usually get down to meeting up talk.

Are you suggesting develop conversation over a longer period?
No, you're doing it right. That is the right approach, I do the same. By initiating meeting up soon, girl can see that you are confident and she can assume that you're good in 1to1 moments. Some guys avoid meeting up soon because they are shy so they need to know a girl better.

Also, I don't have time for texting months prior meeting.
 

soulforge

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No, you're doing it right. That is the right approach, I do the same. By initiating meeting up soon, girl can see that you are confident and she can assume that you're good in 1to1 moments. Some guys avoid meeting up soon because they are shy so they need to know a girl better.

Also, I don't have time for texting months prior meeting.

Well this is what I generally try to do, pin down a date.

However some posters are suggesting that it comes across as desperate and thirsty...

Same.. Sometimes I don't feel like I have the energy for endless chit chat over two weeks with some sloot that I just want to bang!
 

EyeOnThePrize

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Yeh I have to admit, with my online game, I have kinda been pushing it a little..

I generally try to fix a date within a few days of talking.. Maybe try to build some banter and flirting first then ask for a date later.

What about if you are already having fun with some chick?

What is the harm in simply sending her a message once a week to arrange a date or sex session.. Haha.. I don't think that is being desperate.
Eh once a week to the same chick? Not my style personally. I'm a sucker for novelty.

There's nothing wrong with chatting a bit then pitching a date but wait til it feels good. I have some convos in dating apps that have been going on for months, just back and forth with random stuff. Most girls like to see that you're picky or not quick to want to meet up. Wanting to meet up instantly makes you look easy af or otherwise desperate. But hey sometimes it works out. Really just depends what you're looking for and if you're cool with the consequences (flakes in the case of quick offerings).

From all your threads that I've seen you do go for the crazy ones though. I wouldn't be surprised if the flakes just have some random issues like their ex got out of prison or something.
 
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Romanemp22

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Well this is what I generally try to do, pin down a date.

However some posters are suggesting that it comes across as desperate and thirsty...

Same.. Sometimes I don't feel like I have the energy for endless chit chat over two weeks with some sloot that I just want to bang!
Believe me two to four days it's the exact time to get to know each other a bit and then get together in person. Most of the girls will want it anyway and you don't come across as desperate, don't listen what some guys said.
Also, flakes can happen even if you're texting with a girl for a month or two, it doesn't have to do nothing with you.
 

BackInTheGame78

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You could be right about that man.. I suppose I pushing for a date pretty early on into the conversation.. Maybe after 2-3 days of talk, I usually get down to meeting up talk.

Are you suggesting develop conversation over a longer period?
No that part is fine, I typically do the same thing. I would try and not be overtly sexual at first. I normally save that for in person. My goal is to get them to meet in person and anything that could scare them away from that I tend to stay away from.
 

soulforge

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No that part is fine, I typically do the same thing. I would try and not be overtly sexual at first. I normally save that for in person. My goal is to get them to meet in person and anything that could scare them away from that I tend to stay away from.

Yeh getting sexual is tricky.. Some run off the moment you go down that path.. However some become more interested in meeting up
 

Tilex

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I haven't been flaked on in a while, but my attraction towards them drops dramatically.
They lose 6 points on an attraction level for flaking.
A 10 would become a 4
An 8 would become a 2
A 6 would become a 0

I would never consider anyone below a 6 to be attractive.
Their entire existence would be deleted in my mind.
Flaking is extremely unattractive!
 
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soulforge

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I haven't been flaked on in a while, but my attraction towards them drops dramatically.
They lose 6 points on an attraction level for flaking.
A 10 would become a 4
An 8 would become a 2
A 6 would become a 0

I would never consider anyone below a 6 to be attractive.
Their entire existence would be deleted in my mind.
Flaking is extremely unattractive!
I feel the same way.. The chick who flaked on me works at our company.. I have seen her around today & I didn't feel any attraction for her.

She's a repeat offender.. 3 flakes in total and always uses not being to get a sitter as her excuse..

By the way looks wise I would say she is 6-7 so in my eyes she is a two right now.

I think in the future I will take a tougher approach with flakes.. One flake and if you don't have a good reason? You are out.

I would also expect her to reschedule.
 

cola

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I feel the same way.. The chick who flaked on me works at our company.. I have seen her around today & I didn't feel any attraction for her.

She's a repeat offender.. 3 flakes in total and always uses not being to get a sitter as her excuse..

By the way looks wise I would say she is 6-7 so in my eyes she is a two right now.

I think in the future I will take a tougher approach with flakes.. One flake and if you don't have a good reason? You are out.

I would also expect her to reschedule.
Yea at this point(I’m 31, I think you are about the same age) it’s one flake and I never offer again. In fact I no longer reach out after a flake. She had to text and schedule the next meet up.
You’d make sure you had a babysitter if I was a multimillionaire and you knew it.
 

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soulforge

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Yea at this point(I’m 31, I think you are about the same age) it’s one flake and I never offer again. In fact I no longer reach out after a flake. She had to text and schedule the next meet up.
You’d make sure you had a babysitter if I was a multimillionaire and you knew it.
Absolutely.. If you was a millionaire, she would have an army of babysitters on standby so she can hook this rich man in.

The only reason why I took a little softer approach on this occasion is because she has recently come out of a long relationship and her ex won't have the kid.

Problem is.. Once you let them get away with one flake.. You can bet your ass another one is coming.

Same as you Cola.. I absolutely cut them out of my life.. Unless she comes to me with clear intentions.

I won't even reply to.. hey how's it going? Why even give her a response & attention.

I generally lose attractive for girls once they have taken this pizz like this.
 

BackInTheGame78

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Yea at this point(I’m 31, I think you are about the same age) it’s one flake and I never offer again. In fact I no longer reach out after a flake. She had to text and schedule the next meet up.
You’d make sure you had a babysitter if I was a multimillionaire and you knew it.
But you aren't. And if you were, would you even want a woman who is more interested in your wallet than in you?
 

Aeterna

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I used to get butthurt and then I asked myself this question "What was I going to do with my free time if I never had a date scheduled?"

Was I going to workout? Learn a new language? Learn about new streams of income? Find a new hobby?

NOPE! Unfortunately, I went to the club/bars to chase more women, swiped/texted for hours on OLD for some quick strange, or tried to contact a booty call.

I honestly don't think guys are butthurt that the woman made plans and didn't follow through with them, but instead they are butthurt because they had nothing better to do with their time other than to entertain a woman.

But as for dealing with flakes, if the woman cancels on me then I cancel the woman regardless of a reschedule or excuse.
 

In2theGame

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Here's the thing about flakes. It's not the flaking that makes Men "butthurt" but their own ego's and self confidence.

You have to ask yourself, is it the flaking that I'm upset about or is it because I feel undesired by a particular Woman that I desire?

When Men get flaked on, this is how we feel and the questions we have running in our own minds..
  • Feeling undesired by the Woman I want.
  • There must be a "better" guy that she flaked on me for.
  • I'm not attractive/hot enough for this chick or else she wouldn't have flaked.
  • Disrespected by this "B!tch",she thinks she can treat me like I'm some beta?
  • She's not that excited and aroused enough by me...
There are COUNTLESS reasons Women flake. From feeling insecure about a pimple on her cheek to her feeling "unsexy" on the day of the date. Even dumb sh*t that we Men don't think is a big deal, is a big deal for them. Sometimes they just flake because.... they're simply time wasters. Who knows. The only thing you can control is yourself.

I used to get "butthurt" a while ago when a girl canceled on me and this is coming from a guy who literally had groups of Women turning their heads and Women approaching me. I have heard that I was gorgeous, sexy, hot, etc... from MANY Women and guess what... there were some times I did get canceled on. It wasn't a lot but it did happen. So the idea that "Chads" or hot guys never get flaked on is false. Strangely, it was the Women who were 7's that flaked the most. My flake rate on 8 or 9's was VERY low. Doesnt make sense does it? I'm hooking up with very attractive Women yet feeling upset because a 7 flakes on me? It was my ego taking a hit.

Ultimately, when a girl flaked on me, my response was "Ok, no problem hun" and I proceeded to delete the number. Why get upset when there are plenty of other (probably hotter) Women out there? it doesnt make sense to feel upset over a chick that flakes out because you should have other Women ready to talk to anyway.
 

Kotaix

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I honestly don't think guys are butthurt that the woman made plans and didn't follow through with them, but instead they are butthurt because they had nothing better to do with their time other than to entertain a woman.
There is a lot of truth to this.

If you're making your happiness contingent of the approval of a woman then you're going to get butthurt, this is also a major turn-off for women. If you feel butthurt you need to figure out why you feel that way and work on getting rid of it.

I find the solution to be spiritual for this, and not logical. By which i mean it depends on the way that you see the world, not on the objective reality of the world. It's a matter of your own opinion, and nothing else.
 
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