"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Do I tell my fiance that I'm a stalker?

GreatHornedOwl

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This has been eating at me since our engagement. I first "met" with her on PoF. A couple of quick messages back and forth. Nothing ever materialized. I bookmarked her profile and would periodically check it for months. Then I started Facebook stalking her for about 4 years. She listed her profession, which was in retail, and I showed up to her place of employment and charmed her. I got her phone number, we started dating, and the rest is history.

I'm a little apprehensive to bring this revelation to her, because I'm unsure on how she would handle it.

Any thoughts?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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sosousage

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WOw dude XDDDDDDDDDDDDDdd that was the creepiest post ive read since the RichardTheFrog times


dont tell her
 

taiyuu_otoko

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You shouldn't have even posted this.

This is the kind of shyte you need to keep to yourself, not even share it anonymously online.

Whether you tell her now or not doesn't really matter.

It will come out eventually and it will sour the relationship.

Just out of curiosity, during the four year stalking period, did you actually date or have relationships with other women?
 

sosousage

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You shouldn't have even posted this.

This is the kind of shyte you need to keep to yourself, not even share it anonymously online.

Whether you tell her now or not doesn't really matter.

It will come out eventually and it will sour the relationship.

Just out of curiosity, during the four year stalking period, did you actually date or have relationships with other women?
no he more sounds like some unpopular dude with no women in his life

i mean how could you stalk girl for 4 yrs? what was the point of adding a tinder girl on facebook, girl that previously ghosted you on tinder
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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GreatHornedOwl

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I never added her on Facebook. I just looked at her profile. And the reason I perused her was because I wanted to prove to myself that I could get her.
 

GreatHornedOwl

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That's not the half of it, lol. She would always talk about Hawaii on Facebook and how much she loved it. Well, when I went into her place of work, I made sure I was wearing a Honolulu shirt.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Stoic

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Have to admit, a part of me thinks you are a goddamn genius by meeting her this way.
 

speed dawg

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All you people judging this dude need to get your heads out of your ass. We all have done stuff like this.

But to answer your question......NO, do not tell her.
 

Julian

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Lol this is classic right here
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Black Widow Void

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Other than your conscience feeling a little 'cleansed' the end result will not be favorable.
Normally, I would say "probably not be favorable" but I speak from repeated failed experience of opening up a little too much. No matter 'how different' you think she is, don't do it.

As far as some of the flack you've gotten from a few members here... pay not attention. We've *all* done what you've done to some degree. Perhaps it's a case of sour-grapes because theirs didn't pay off as well as yours?

Your efforts paid off.
Cheers!
 

Suave88

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No. Don't do it. Think about it. How useful is that information to her? Will breaking the news improve the relationship? no, it will not. See how some of us are quick to say that your actions were creepy. She will believe you are nuts. If she does not brake up.She will use it to manipulate you. Never tell a woman how much you love her. You don't know her in the first time. If sex life is good, keep on banging her. It was 4 years of stalking pal. That is alot. If you want to tell her, wait until you are in your 70s and married to her. Not now.
 

2Rocky

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Share this story as you are toasting her on your 50th wedding anniversary at a party with your friends and family, or as a eulogy if she passes before you. Not a moment before....
 

John9999

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Oh hell no ! You will kill the entire fantasy for her. You met and swept her off her feet. Just like she’s dreamed would happen her entire life.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

Read more...

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