You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Your talking about my F.A.Q. aren't you? See I told you! Girls are JUST as shy as we are. Isn't it fukken unbelievable? Don't hold yourself back because of your own limiting beliefs. It's the man's duty to approach.First woman I made brief eye contact with, but she was starting to look away. I wouldn't normally say hi without EC, but having read various posts saying otherwise, I thought I'd try it. So I said hi with her looking away, she seemed a lil surprised, looked at me and smiled(I was smiling too) and returned my greeting.
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
Your problem lies in your topic of dicussion. If you work, when you're there, do you want to talk about what you're doing, or do you want to talk about anything to take your mind off of whatever boring **** you're doing? Talk about something else. You said its hot out right? Well, go up to some chick in Abercrombie who is by some ripped clothes (not hard to find thereOriginally posted by Caldus
#2: In bookstore, came up to employee (female - a 6 I would say), smiled, and said hi, excuse me. She turns around and I try to smile but shyed out for this one. I ask if they are hiring and she says nope sorry. So I say thanks and then smile and then walk away. Rating: 1/5 <--- Probably not going to count this one.
Yeah good point. I mean I was mainly going for the eye contact and smile deal really. I'll have to work on other aspects of my game later on. But good tips.Originally posted by LostinNJ
Your problem lies in your topic of dicussion. If you work, when you're there, do you want to talk about what you're doing, or do you want to talk about anything to take your mind off of whatever boring **** you're doing? Talk about something else. You said its hot out right? Well, go up to some chick in Abercrombie who is by some ripped clothes (not hard to find there) and make eye contact and give a little smile. Get closer to her (not weird close, but conversation close) and make some joke about how they get away with charging $80 for a torn up pair of jeans. Don't make her fel guilty, say "they" in reference to A&F instead of anything like "you" or "you guys" when making the joke. She will probably giggle or laugh, and mention something about how they would be great in this weather. Take it from there
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Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.
I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.
Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules. Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.
Yeah you're right. I will spend the remainder of the week focusing on HBs, but there weren't that man HBs today (I'll visit bigger and more popular malls, and the beach), and I am shy talking to any stranger whether they be men or women, so I felt talking to everybody would give me a little boost.Originally posted by Caldus
Yeah good point. I mean I was mainly going for the eye contact and smile deal really. I'll have to work on other aspects of my game later on. But good tips.
And very well done Mjfan. I would suggest concentrating on HB's from this point on but that's just me. Whatever you fear approaching the most just go right towards it. Sounds like you're feeling better about this.
Yea it was! Couldn't think where I had read it at the time. Well written FAQ, good job.Originally posted by Ever onward
Your talking about my F.A.Q. aren't you? See I told you! Girls are JUST as shy as we are. Isn't it fukken unbelievable? Don't hold yourself back because of your own limiting beliefs. It's the man's duty to approach.
...
Originally posted by Mjfan12
Well I was feeling kinda scared and nervous about even saying hi and eye contact today.
Usually I would have just given up and or procastinated and would never have gotton anything done.
But then I remembered all you guys and that motivated me to get out there! I WILL suceed!
...
The only thing I was disappointed with is that not many people initiated any eye contact, and the few that did, did so for only a few seconds.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Well, many gave me a little eye contact, but many didnt.Originally posted by crazygecko
Good job Mjfan. Can't believe you did 34, that's incredible!
I felt scared while doing them too, good to push yourself. Well done for overcoming your fear!
Regarding not getting much EC, how are you doing the hi's? Are you saying them while not having EC I'm guessing and waiting for them to make EC after. I found it helpful to make EC first, then smile and say hi. People seem to be more open, and less startled this way.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.