"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Disbelief at a compliment.

ARrocket

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I've noticed that with a lot of girls, I tease them and bust on them so much that when I give a genuine compliment, they look at me strangely, as if they can't believe I'm being nice to them. Is this common? It seems to me like I'm on the right track, but I'm wondering what your opinions are.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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francoatgrex

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Possibly,but it's all in the nonverbal attitude u adopt when you say the serious stuff versus when you tease.
 

MisterMcGee

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They're taking your compliment with a lot of weight cause they feel it's genuine if you're telling the truth. Good stuff
 

ARrocket

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francoatgrex said:
Possibly,but it's all in the nonverbal attitude u adopt when you say the serious stuff versus when you tease.
Could you expand on that? I usually will have a sort of half smile when I give a sincere compliment...lots of eye contact...probably about the same as when I tease her, except without the devilish grin. haha
 

francoatgrex

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Eye contact is good, half smile is not good (or a grin, those are good for teasing joking). When you want to give a compliment you need a genuine authentic smile (look up the so-called "Duchenne smile"), or even no smile at all, but a look of enchantement (be careful, no-smile doesn't mean look morose or depressed! that's a no no). It may not be necessarily about just smile or eye contact, you'll need also the proper tone of voice, the proper timing (for example if you've just been teasing, you stop talking for a while and look at her, the momentary silence signals a shift in mood and topic, then you genuinely deliver your killer compliment like in a movie).
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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ARrocket

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francoatgrex said:
Eye contact is good, half smile is not good (or a grin, those are good for teasing joking). When you want to give a compliment you need a genuine authentic smile (look up the so-called "Duchenne smile"), or even no smile at all, but a look of enchantement (be careful, no-smile doesn't mean look morose or depressed! that's a no no). It may not be necessarily about just smile or eye contact, you'll need also the proper tone of voice, the proper timing (for example if you've just been teasing, you stop talking for a while and look at her, the momentary silence signals a shift in mood and topic, then you genuinely deliver your killer compliment like in a movie).
Yeah man, that's the effect I go for. And by half smile I meant a good genuine one...just not a huge grin. But yeah, good answer :up:
 
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