BannedGod
Senior Don Juan
I'm working on a girl to get a LTR with her, and she is very flirty with me, but I was wondering... How can I tell innocent flirting from real interest?
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.
I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.
Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules. Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.
OK I didn't use the right terms... I'm not really working her or anything. By that I meant I spend a lot of times with her and hang out a lot with her and I'm not at her feet or anything. I don't know if it's more clear?WC2 said:"I'm working on a girl to get a LTR with her."
It should be known that things work out much better when the girl works for YOU. If you're already working for her then you're already in a losing game.
Second, you don't mention having any sexual contact with her so I assume you haven't (correct me if I'm wrong).. the fact that you are even thinking about LTR possibilities throws your losing game, to a game down the drain where it will never come back.
Might seem a little drastic, but it's very hard to work for a woman these days. If your time with a woman seems more like working, then it's not going to go that far. Try "I'm having fun with this girl," or "This girl is extremely attractive," but stay away from that LTR word. If you attract her, then she will give you signs. Then you can make the move and kiss her; don't ask her for a relationship.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
musclyjerk said:Call them on their flirtatious bluffs.
Flirting should be resigned to showing signs of interest and that's it. Unfortunately women abuse flirting for their own self-esteem and enjoyment thus leading to the male to be unaware of her true intentions or feelings forcing him to yet again put his balls on the line for just another chick who may or may not be interested in him.
Even if it's obviously friendly call their bluff. Call it in a sexual way, too. Slap her arse, grope it - whatever. Just call their damn bluff when they're flirting with you so if they're trying to use you it's nipped in the bud early and leaves them feeling a little violated.
It's win-win - if they are interested, you have moved things up a notch. If not, you have made them feel arkward and you know where you stand.
The Muscly Jerk
BannedGod said:I'm working on a girl to get a LTR with her, and she is very flirty with me, but I was wondering... How can I tell innocent flirting from real interest?
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.