"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Difference between being mysterious and not interested?

Ouzo

Don Juan
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I hear heaps of stuff about ...

  • Don't ring her often
  • Don't sms her often
  • Don't smother her
  • etc

But ...I don't want her to think I'm not interested?

Whats the dealeo here?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Carpe_Diem

Don Juan
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I guess this comes back to making yourself the 'prize'.

Make it evident that you have your own life which is very full, but could possibly spare her a little time in your busy schedule if she can prove she's worth it.
 

I'm Joe Dirt

Master Don Juan
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Well it means you don't do those things excessivley I guess.

You don't wanna call her two or three times a day. You also don't wanna keep sending her texts all the time (especially if she has to pay for them by the message like they do in the USA unless they have a text package).

I would say take turns calling eachother. For every time I call I would expect her to call next time. Maybe at first I will call twice in a row if she doesn't call the next day, but try to keep a balance.

If you are the one always making the calls, initiating contact, making the dates, etc. then you seem desperate and needy. By letting her take turns with you doing those things you have a balanced relationship.
 

iCY

Don Juan
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theres other ways of showing her your interested, and thats done when your actually with her. not calling too often is just to make her think about you and wonder what your doing/where you are
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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