Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Did I play this right?

element0

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There was a girl I used to work with that I though I saw recently out a bar. We used to flirt at work, went out to lunch a few times, but no socializing out of work. We were both interns, but I didn't want to escalate because of work and we literally sat two feet away from each other every day. I thought it could get awkward if I started to really pursue her, and things went south.

She went back to school after winter break, and I haven't talked to her since mid January. Last week, I thought I saw her when I was out at a bar, it turned out it wasn't her. But I sent her an email the next day, because I didn't have her number.

element0: Hey, thought I saw you out this weekend, did you turn 21 yet?

HB: no :( haha May 3! so exactly 1 month from today.

element0: That's right, just when school let's out. Have fun at (place I used to work), tell ***** I said whatup.

HB: haha okay will do. thats if i get a job there. i still havent emailed them about this summer yet.

element0: You'll work there. I saw ***** yesterday literally sprinting down Carson. What's your number? We gotta hit up Carson street sometime.

HB: ha too funny! he was texting me about how the lady we always saw in the hall was getting fired! yeah sounds good :) ***-***-****


So I waited a few days and texted her last night.

element0: Hey HB, it's element0, stalk T Swift lately?!

HB: Hey! Nah, thats more of a summer hobby when I don't have anything better to do haha how are you?

element0: Same old, just no more (place I used to work)...it feels great!

HB: Yeah, I'm dreading going back :( ive been putting off emailing them cuz I don't want to accept my fate. Did you get a new job then?

element0: I feel for you, that lab is hell on Earth! I got a job downtown doing cost analysis...they are actually putting me in charge of the interns this summer...gonna work them to death! How's Meadville treating you?

HB: Haha nice. Eh same as always. I'm writing a paper tho so I gtg focus, Ttyl.

element0: Fun...later


Not sure if I played this right, but the interaction seemed to flow between us, so I left the conversation feeling like I can further the interaction when she gets done with school. I haven't had a lot of practice with this stuff, so any comments are appreciated.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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element0

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Allurre said:
Stop the text swapping. Set up a date and see how she responds. That will cut the fluff.
I plan to, but she is still at school (out of town) for a few more weeks, so I'm not going to ask her out until she gets back. I don't plan on texting her anymore.
 

PectoralisMajor

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Yea you did a GREAT job, IF your goal is to BORE the pants off this girl.

You mostly talk about work, which she doesnt like, so when she thinks of you all she has to go on is WORK. tut :nono:

after she so freely gave her number, id have definitely skipped the texting and called after a couple of days. explained what days I was busy, and gave her a couple of days when your free. setup the date, BANG.

or you can keep texting her about work. YOUR choice.:eek:
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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PectoralisMajor

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ohhhhhhhhhhhh you're in school. that explains the texts and lack of chat.

shouldnt this be in the college forum?????
 

element0

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PectoralisMajor said:
You mostly talk about work, which she doesnt like, so when she thinks of you all she has to go on is WORK. tut :nono:
Fair enough, I could/should have moved the dialogue in another direction, point taken.

after she so freely gave her number, id have definitely skipped the texting and called after a couple of days.
Fair enough, but we only exchanged a few texts, and she isn't going to be home from school until early May. I don't plan on contacting her again until that gets a little closer.
 

element0

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PectoralisMajor said:
ohhhhhhhhhhhh you're in school. that explains the texts and lack of chat.

shouldnt this be in the college forum?????
There's a high school forum?
 
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