"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Did I play this right?

element0

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There was a girl I used to work with that I though I saw recently out a bar. We used to flirt at work, went out to lunch a few times, but no socializing out of work. We were both interns, but I didn't want to escalate because of work and we literally sat two feet away from each other every day. I thought it could get awkward if I started to really pursue her, and things went south.

She went back to school after winter break, and I haven't talked to her since mid January. Last week, I thought I saw her when I was out at a bar, it turned out it wasn't her. But I sent her an email the next day, because I didn't have her number.

element0: Hey, thought I saw you out this weekend, did you turn 21 yet?

HB: no :( haha May 3! so exactly 1 month from today.

element0: That's right, just when school let's out. Have fun at (place I used to work), tell ***** I said whatup.

HB: haha okay will do. thats if i get a job there. i still havent emailed them about this summer yet.

element0: You'll work there. I saw ***** yesterday literally sprinting down Carson. What's your number? We gotta hit up Carson street sometime.

HB: ha too funny! he was texting me about how the lady we always saw in the hall was getting fired! yeah sounds good :) ***-***-****


So I waited a few days and texted her last night.

element0: Hey HB, it's element0, stalk T Swift lately?!

HB: Hey! Nah, thats more of a summer hobby when I don't have anything better to do haha how are you?

element0: Same old, just no more (place I used to work)...it feels great!

HB: Yeah, I'm dreading going back :( ive been putting off emailing them cuz I don't want to accept my fate. Did you get a new job then?

element0: I feel for you, that lab is hell on Earth! I got a job downtown doing cost analysis...they are actually putting me in charge of the interns this summer...gonna work them to death! How's Meadville treating you?

HB: Haha nice. Eh same as always. I'm writing a paper tho so I gtg focus, Ttyl.

element0: Fun...later


Not sure if I played this right, but the interaction seemed to flow between us, so I left the conversation feeling like I can further the interaction when she gets done with school. I haven't had a lot of practice with this stuff, so any comments are appreciated.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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element0

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Allurre said:
Stop the text swapping. Set up a date and see how she responds. That will cut the fluff.
I plan to, but she is still at school (out of town) for a few more weeks, so I'm not going to ask her out until she gets back. I don't plan on texting her anymore.
 

PectoralisMajor

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Yea you did a GREAT job, IF your goal is to BORE the pants off this girl.

You mostly talk about work, which she doesnt like, so when she thinks of you all she has to go on is WORK. tut :nono:

after she so freely gave her number, id have definitely skipped the texting and called after a couple of days. explained what days I was busy, and gave her a couple of days when your free. setup the date, BANG.

or you can keep texting her about work. YOUR choice.:eek:
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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PectoralisMajor

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ohhhhhhhhhhhh you're in school. that explains the texts and lack of chat.

shouldnt this be in the college forum?????
 

element0

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PectoralisMajor said:
You mostly talk about work, which she doesnt like, so when she thinks of you all she has to go on is WORK. tut :nono:
Fair enough, I could/should have moved the dialogue in another direction, point taken.

after she so freely gave her number, id have definitely skipped the texting and called after a couple of days.
Fair enough, but we only exchanged a few texts, and she isn't going to be home from school until early May. I don't plan on contacting her again until that gets a little closer.
 

element0

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PectoralisMajor said:
ohhhhhhhhhhhh you're in school. that explains the texts and lack of chat.

shouldnt this be in the college forum?????
There's a high school forum?
 
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