Did a silly thing

[Silly Billy]

Hi all,

newbie here.

I did a silly thing the other day. There’s this new girl at work who I hit it off with right away. She’s super friendly and flirty.

i know I shouldn’t of, but I invited her to lunch to which she agreed. Which was okay but nothing special.

couple of days after was some brief small-talk in the kitchen and nothing more.

anyway, I’ve found myself kind of obsessing over her like I’ve fallen in love or something!! Which is the last thing I wanted believe me. Especially in the workplace.

so I went and did something stupid. I sent her a work email kind of inviting her out for a quick bite on the weekend and a continuation our conversation. I said it in such a way that I was going to be out anyway and if she wa around to tag along.

I got no response and now im like oh Fudge. Seeing her at work is going to be super awkward now. Plus I could very well be seen as the creeper who preys on new girls.

it felt like a good idea at the time but as soon as I hit send I was like ‘what the f**k did you just do?’

any advice on how to handle this?

I’m so sirry

 

[Doctor Europeo]

Dont make a big deal out of it. Let her bring it up. If she doesnt bring it up, pretend you never hit send.

This is why in general (there may be exceptions) its not worth pursuing anything at work. Especially if you want to keep your current job.

 

[Silly Billy]

Thanks DrSuave.

I won’t bring it up and I’ll keep my distance and pray I don’t come across as the butthurt creeper giving the new girl the silent treatment.

 

[Serenity]

Seeing her at work is going to be super awkward now.

Only if you make it awkward. As said above, pretend it didn't happen unless she brings it up. If she does bring it up then act as if it doesn't matter much at all to you.

I won’t bring it up and I’ll keep my distance and pray I don’t come across as the butthurt creeper giving the new girl the silent treatment.

Don't go out of your way to avoid her, but also don't go out of your way to give her attention, the irrationality of doing either of these extremes is what would make it awkward. Just go about doing your job and treat her like any other platonic co-worker.

like I’ve fallen in love or something!!

I tend not to label this feeling as love. What you experienced is infatuation, hormones stirring up a lot of emotions creating a sort of high centered around the woman you desire, often leading to irrational decision making such as this. Real love is more rational and mature.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Hi all,

newbie here.

I did a silly thing the other day. There’s this new girl at work who I hit it off with right away. She’s super friendly and flirty.

i know I shouldn’t of, but I invited her to lunch to which she agreed. Which was okay but nothing special.

couple of days after was some brief small-talk in the kitchen and nothing more.

anyway, I’ve found myself kind of obsessing over her like I’ve fallen in love or something!! Which is the last thing I wanted believe me. Especially in the workplace.

so I went and did something stupid. I sent her a work email kind of inviting her out for a quick bite on the weekend and a continuation our conversation. I said it in such a way that I was going to be out anyway and if she wa around to tag along.

I got no response and now im like oh Fudge. Seeing her at work is going to be super awkward now. Plus I could very well be seen as the creeper who preys on new girls.

it felt like a good idea at the time but as soon as I hit send I was like ‘what the f**k did you just do?’

any advice on how to handle this?

I’m so sirry

It's only awkward if you make it awkward. She didn't respond, don't bring it up again unless she does. You are now flirting with sexual harassment if you are in the US.

 

[RazorRambo24]

Hi all,

newbie here.

I did a silly thing the other day. There’s this new girl at work who I hit it off with right away. She’s super friendly and flirty.

i know I shouldn’t of, but I invited her to lunch to which she agreed. Which was okay but nothing special.

couple of days after was some brief small-talk in the kitchen and nothing more.

anyway, I’ve found myself kind of obsessing over her like I’ve fallen in love or something!! Which is the last thing I wanted believe me. Especially in the workplace.

so I went and did something stupid. I sent her a work email kind of inviting her out for a quick bite on the weekend and a continuation our conversation. I said it in such a way that I was going to be out anyway and if she wa around to tag along.

I got no response and now im like oh Fudge. Seeing her at work is going to be super awkward now. Plus I could very well be seen as the creeper who preys on new girls.

it felt like a good idea at the time but as soon as I hit send I was like ‘what the f**k did you just do?’

any advice on how to handle this?

I’m so sirry

As a man who just got fired at the end of November from a huge department store with over 300-400 employees at a given time, over 400,000 sq foot space for basically being involved with multiple girls and pissing the wrong one off.. I would say, stop everything you're doing now before its too late. The fact that you caught emotions/are obsessing over her for almost no reason is going to lead to disaster.

You're also alot older.. For me, I got away with alot of the stuff because I look young and charmed alot of managers..

 

[CollegeMan22]

It's only awkward if you make it awkward. She didn't respond, don't bring it up again unless she does. You are now flirting with sexual harassment if you are in the US.

This is sexual harassment in the US? I mean I understand that whatever the woman says in such a situation is coming out of the infallible mouth of God Himself, but I didn't think asking a girl out could be sexual harassment.

I've done it before in a large corporation with girls who are completely outside of my department, but I would never ask out a girl who is on my local team.

 

[Silly Billy]

I know, it’s so crazy how I got hijacked by my own emotions to do something so silly.

and you know the most ironic part? During our lunch ‘date’ she complimented me on how calm I was.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

This is sexual harassment in the US? I mean I understand that whatever the woman says in such a situation is coming out of the infallible mouth of God Himself, but I didn't think asking a girl out could be sexual harassment.

I've done it before in a large corporation with girls who are completely outside of my department, but I would never ask out a girl who is on my local team.

If she ignores OP completely and he tries it again it very well could be. The bottom line is she is there to work, not be asked out by people. Continuing to ask her very well could make her uncomfortable the same way continuing to ask a woman you get a number from that doesn't respond would...that woman can choose to block your number tho. She can't and has to check emails and go to work.

Unless a woman makes it very obvious she is interested in you the first time you ask her out and agrees to it without flaking, there should be no other bringing this up at work.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I know, it’s so crazy how I got hijacked by my own emotions to do something so silly.

and you know the most ironic part? During our lunch ‘date’ she complimented me on how calm I was.

OP now you are starting to get my troll senses tingling.

 

[Silly Billy]

OP now you are starting to get my troll senses tingling.

Why?