Definition of Incel

[Rocky_Hendrix]

Wassup guys?

Can someone explain to me what does it mean to be an incel? How can I identify incels?

Google is ****ty nowadays...

 

[Askaladd]

By definition an incel is a person who is involuntarily celibate. They cannot have sex even though they want to. It could be due to a lack of partners, a medical condition, etc.

In reality incels are men who can't get their wiener wet and don't talk nicely about women or outright hate them. Some incels are indifferent towards women, some want them all dead. Incels are a very varying group of people from all races and they have many differences. From my experience the most common traits are:
-A lack of hoes. This is caused by several reasons. Undesirable physical traits, autism, trauma, insecurity.
-Some level of disdain towards women.
-General traits of a loser/rotter. Porn, junk food, video games. These are called copes by incels, as in coping from the fact of having no hoes.
-Some level of autism.

 

[Mike32ct]

Someone who wants to have sex but hasn’t been able to find a willing partner for more than one year. Often they’ve never had sex or haven’t for years, but we need to separate out “normies” who are just in a normal dry spell.

How to identify one? He’s the guy in your school/work/social circle that you are pretty sure is straight, but nobody ever mentions his dating life. Everybody else just sort of “knows” he’s perpetually single and/or undateable and doesn’t ever bring it up out of politeness lol.

 

[Plinco]

You can also think of it like this: just like there's a broke mentality, or a millionaire mentality, there's also an incel mentality or a slayer mentality.

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[corrector]

Here is an interesting discussion topic about today's modern incel:

Basically extreme hypergamy is to blame for incels because only the top 20% guys are getting all of the women attention on dating apps.

This is why you have a level of disengagement now that is extreme. There are allot of youtube vids that show women paying to go to singles events and no guys is showing up. People realize, if you are not the top 20% then why bother, and the top 20% doesn't have to go out of their way to go to these places.

 

[BadBoy89]

You want layman on sosuave to give a better definition than a billion dollar company? Rock on!

An incel is a man who cannot find a hot girl between 18 -29 to have sex with by attracting her.

Incels can pay for sex, they don't want to.
Incels can have sex with single mothers, they don't want to
Incels can have sex with older women, they don't want to
Incels can have sex with overweight women, they don't want to
Incels can have sex with ugly women, they don't want to

For the incel, the girl has to be the same level woman as the Alpha Dogs get. Otherwise he doesn't care.

 

[BaronOfHair]

@corrector "Basically extreme hypergamy is to blame for incels because only the top 20% guys are getting all of the women attention on dating apps"

At ALL times in human history, the ballers/Gs/high value men/whatever other euphemism you want to use, were the most desirable. Unless you're living in a pre-industrial society where social mobility is more non-existent than the highway patrol in rural Antartica, every man today can become the sort of fella who's widely admired by his fellow men and desired by women

AI is ultimately of little consequence, and labeling oneself "involuntarily celibate"(I.E. Refusing to acknowledge that your own thinking and behavioras are sabotaging your prospects of achieving the goals you say you desire)depletes whatever power you possess, rather than enhancing it

 

[RoadKing_Rabbit]

I agree most with Baron. While the definition is very loose, the cause or character of what MAKES one an incel is in my opinion way too open to opinion.

If you REALLY, REALLY, wanted to have sex, you could. From directly paying to only going out right before bars close and picking one of the last ladies to leave, hehehe. Dropping standards really low (no matter how dry I got, I still didn't like bad breath, body odor or poor hygiene / laundry. One COULD forgo those too, just wear protection) and getting online and mentioning specifically that you're a 'bbw lover' or something along those lines.

If only more men realized that even having sex with low hanging fruit exposes you to games and gives you opportunities to try things out and improve... Back in the 00's, my Marine buddies called these "Practice girls." Not very moral, but look how women move, seemingly detached from morality AND rationality. Then again, perhaps I'm glad that most men DON'T understand these things. Then it's easier for me to stand out.

Being an incel can never be a good thing. It's beyond just not getting any. It's laziness and indifference to low self esteem as well.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Wassup guys?

Can someone explain to me what does it mean to be an incel? How can I identify incels?

Google is ****ty nowadays...

It's actually not. Go Google it.

 

[BaronOfHair]

I agree most with Baron. While the definition is very loose, the cause or character of what MAKES one an incel is in my opinion way too open to opinion.

If you REALLY, REALLY, wanted to have sex, you could. From directly paying to only going out right before bars close and picking one of the last ladies to leave, hehehe. Dropping standards really low (no matter how dry I got, I still didn't like bad breath, body odor or poor hygiene / laundry. One COULD forgo those too, just wear protection) and getting online and mentioning specifically that you're a 'bbw lover' or something along those lines.

If only more men realized that even having sex with low hanging fruit exposes you to games and gives you opportunities to try things out and improve... Back in the 00's, my Marine buddies called these "Practice girls." Not very moral, but look how women move, seemingly detached from morality AND rationality. Then again, perhaps I'm glad that most men DON'T understand these things. Then it's easier for me to stand out.

Being an incel can never be a good thing. It's beyond just not getting any. It's laziness and indifference to low self esteem as well.

I'll give MGTOWs, MRAs, and those adjacent one 100,000,000,000,000th of a point here:

If a fellow has been afflicted a physical ailment that's left him with some
sort of "locked in" disorder, where he's confined to a bed in a hospice somewhere 24/7... Fine, NOTHING he does is voluntary anymore. 99% of the male population ARE NOT in a scenario that even slightly resembles this though, especially those of us residing in The Post-Industrial West

Ask most of these self-described Incels to document how much time they spend out in the fresh air and sunlight over the course of one single day alone VS Being glued to The X-Box or bingewatching self-identified Anti-SJW content creators on YT.... The answer is almost: "15 minutes when it's warm. 0 when the weather becomes even mildly chilly"

 

[RoadKing_Rabbit]

I'll give MGTOWs, MRAs, and those adjacent one 100,000,000,000,000th of a point here:

If a fellow has been afflicted a physical ailment that's left him with some
sort of "locked in" disorder, where he's confined to a bed in a hospice somewhere 24/7... Fine, NOTHING he does is voluntary anymore. This ain't the case with MOST men though

True. Locked in Syndrome is a real MF. I've only ever HEARD of a friend's uncles acquaintance having this sort of thing. Weirdly, it just 'happened.' No stroke, no TBI, no signs of any other illness or disability. He just started not being able to do things out of the blue over the course of 3-4 months. Very rapid onset. Dude is apparently smart and in excellent shape prior to this. He's just turned 60. So the absolute MF of it all, is he's not likely do croak of natural causes for quite some time. I can't even imagine what I'd do there.

 

[corrector]

I agree most with Baron. While the definition is very loose, the cause or character of what MAKES one an incel is in my opinion way too open to opinion.

If you REALLY, REALLY, wanted to have sex, you could. From directly paying to only going out right before bars close and picking one of the last ladies to leave, hehehe. Dropping standards really low (no matter how dry I got, I still didn't like bad breath, body odor or poor hygiene / laundry. One COULD forgo those too, just wear protection) and getting online and mentioning specifically that you're a 'bbw lover' or something along those lines.

If only more men realized that even having sex with low hanging fruit exposes you to games and gives you opportunities to try things out and improve... Back in the 00's, my Marine buddies called these "Practice girls." Not very moral, but look how women move, seemingly detached from morality AND rationality. Then again, perhaps I'm glad that most men DON'T understand these things. Then it's easier for me to stand out.

Being an incel can never be a good thing. It's beyond just not getting any. It's laziness and indifference to low self esteem as well.

Post-nut clarity with some of those girls you mentioned above is not a good thing, especially if you are paying for it and she's available to anyone for the right price, etc.... I had a nervous break-down and a whole month gone 12 years ago based on a post-nut clarify (ie non-penetration/escort, etc...). You can't be a straight and narrow, moral type of guy that's not into anything bad, and just visit an escort or one of those women, willy nilly and expect that's not going to screw with your mind. These people have messed up lives, into drugs, too many other guys, and it wrecks you if you come from a clean, upright and morally sound angle. Two different universes don't mix.

 

[RoadKing_Rabbit]

Post-nut clarity with some of those girls you mentioned above is not a good thing, especially if you are paying for it and she's available to anyone for the right price, etc.... I had a nervous break-down and a whole month gone 12 years ago based on a post-nut clarify (ie non-penetration/escort, etc...). You can't be a straight and narrow, moral type of guy that's not into anything bad, and just visit an escort or one of those women, willy nilly and expect that's not going to screw with your mind. These people have messed up lives, into drugs, too many other guys, and it wrecks you if you come from a clean, upright and morally sound angle. Two different universes don't mix.

This really does make sense to me as I can attest to how it is to not being able to attract women to the point they want to jump your bones and to know that you basically made them come up with a REASON to do it that is in their interest to do so.

This is something I barely think about, but I used to due to one of those clean and morally upright backgrounds you mention. Are you saying that it is also "inability to have sex with women who have genuine desire to have sex with you?" This is another nod to the difficulty of creating a concise definition for "Incel." Well, here I am saying this and people don't even bother to know what words with well constructed and concise definitions mean before they call someone something anyway. "Misogynist" or "Chauvanist" anyone?

 

[corrector]

This really does make sense to me as I can attest to how it is to not being able to attract women to the point they want to jump your bones and to know that you basically made them come up with a REASON to do it that is in their interest to do so.

This is something I barely think about, but I used to due to one of those clean and morally upright backgrounds you mention. Are you saying that it is also "inability to have sex with women who have genuine desire to have sex with you?" This is another nod to the difficulty of creating a concise definition for "Incel." Well, here I am saying this and people don't even bother to know what words with well constructed and concise definitions mean before they call someone something anyway. "Misogynist" or "Chauvanist" anyone?

More like the inability to find any woman with a genuine desire to have sex with you in the first place.

What I mentioned was if someone who can't find a willing partner, decides to pay for it (for whatever reason they are paying for it), and decides to go one of the routes like dumpster diving, paying for play, etc... and has post nut clarity afterwards, then it could be a choice filled with regrets or haunts.

For example, I can say I'm unable to find a willing partner to have sex with. Therefore, being 50 years old, let me find a barely legal, 19 year old girl and pay her for a good-time. After post-nut clarity, then you'll feel like a predator, pedo, taking part of trafficing, maybe wonder, how such a wonderful girl got caught up into something like that, is she really doing this voluntarily or is she being controlled by a pimp, did I catch stds/demons from her, etc..... That's an extreme example. You also have milder examples but the principle is the same. Promiscious women/escorts, have been with a large number of guys, have a lifestyle that's polar opposite (drugs, going to parties, getting stoned/drunk, etc...) where if you just come out of the blue, clean and upright, pay for just a brief encounter with them, it's going to be a shock to the system because their reality is too different from your reality as a straight/moral person.

 

[Mike32ct]

The problem with the date down argument (e.g. go for unattractive or much older woman) is these guys are not capable of attracting a short term fling irrespective of her looks. Short of paying for it, they have to go the relationship route.

They would have to lie for several dates and pretend they want a relationship with the unattractive woman. Then pump and dump her. Many are nice guys who don’t really want to do that either.

They either want a short term fling to “scratch an itch” which isn’t going to happen or a relationship with legit mutual attraction which isn’t going to happen either. That’s where they get painted into a corner and thus they call it “involuntary.”

Whether it’s truly “involuntary” or not is obviously up for debate. I wouldn’t get too hung up on that word though; it’s used loosely in this context.

 

[RoadKing_Rabbit]

The problem with the date down argument (e.g. go for unattractive or much older woman) is these guys are not capable of attracting a short term fling irrespective of her looks. Short of paying for it, they have to go the relationship route.

They would have to lie for several dates and pretend they want a relationship with the unattractive woman. Then pump and dump her. Many are nice guys who don’t really want to do that either.

They either want a short term fling to “scratch an itch” which isn’t going to happen or a relationship with legit mutual attraction which isn’t going to happen either. That’s where they get painted into a corner and thus they call it “involuntary.”

Whether it’s truly “involuntary” or not is obviously up for debate. I wouldn’t get too hung up on that word though; it’s used loosely in this context.

It could be avoided altogether and instead be a question of how one gets on with ladies. Seems like a filler word that just makes someone question why the word is being used.

In all honesty, I've never been a big fan of the word. I view the word "Incel" with the same amount of credulity as I view the word "Mansplain." **If you type these two out you'll notice the first gets a spelling suggestion and the second doesn't. I want to vomit now.

 

[Mike32ct]

It could be avoided altogether and instead be a question of how one gets on with ladies. Seems like a filler word that just makes someone question why the word is being used.

In all honesty, I've never been a big fan of the word. I view the word "Incel" with the same amount of credulity as I view the word "Mansplain." **If you type these two out you'll notice the first gets a spelling suggestion and the second doesn't. I want to vomit now.

Yeah fair enough. Again these guys just legit feel “trapped” or “painted into a corner” when it comes to their dating/sex lives. A better, more accurate term would be welcome, whatever that might be.