"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Decent OLD opening message?

IBreatheSpears

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I can't be fúcked to come up with "clever" openers (fúcking r/Tinder makes me cringe) so I'm just being straight up and slightly sexual. So is this a decent opener? This is on OKC but I'm gonna adapt it for tinder next time I get a match, make it a bit shorter. What do you think? Obviously it didn't work on this girl but it got her to be up-front rather than ignoring me. (I sent it to 10-20 chicks today, a few others viewed my profile but didn't reply.)
 

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"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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btownbuck2012

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In my opinion coming across too forward like that is perceived by alot of these women as being inexperienced. You're sucking the tension out of everything. The only time you can act like that, again based on what's worked for me in the past, is after sex. Before you have to let that tension build whether it's asking for a number, taking her out to dinner, suggesting a second date closer to your place, suggesting you go back to your place for a drink. Never explicitly ask for what you want until after sex or it sucks the fun out of everything.
 

IBreatheSpears

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"hi how are you" That's all you need
Idk man, I've seen girls using OKC and they get a hundred of these messages and they just skim over when they see something like "hey what's up..." without opening the full message or looking at the guy's profile. Maybe they are judging from the profile picture, but it's pretty tiny in that view. You would have to be super-Chad to get responses from that. Maybe they were self-conscious with me being nearby and this isn't their typical behaviour but I doubt that.

ask them an interesting open ended question. Something more than "Hey sexy" because I feel like almost every guy with a pulse writes that.
Agreed! That's why I'm trying to be more interesting as well as filter out girls who want to play games. I should ask them something though, you're right, I'll have a think about it.

In my opinion coming across too forward like that is perceived by alot of these women as being inexperienced. You're sucking the tension out of everything. The only time you can act like that, again based on what's worked for me in the past, is after sex. Before you have to let that tension build whether it's asking for a number, taking her out to dinner, suggesting a second date closer to your place, suggesting you go back to your place for a drink. Never explicitly ask for what you want until after sex or it sucks the fun out of everything.
With this message I was trying to just be straight-up and basically just manly: forward about what I want and not afraid to ask for it. This is what seems to work for natural "alphas". But you're right, I should think about being more intriguing/challenging. Thanks.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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KingofPuss

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I think it was ok. Remove the "cute af" line, and delete everything after grab a couple of drinks. Women are not ever going to agree to make out with you on the first message you send them, unless you're brad pitt or some celebrity.

Replace the cute af line with something like "You seem friendly and fun". Keep it light and don't just say you like her for her looks
 

ubercat

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I'll channel ESpi here. Pick their sluttiest photo and say you liked it and they seemed friendly and fun. That's sneaking in the sexy vibe without having to kill the mood.

And remember that most net chicks are crazy. And they come in runs. Some weeks you'll get no replies other weeks your inbox will explode.

And just to revisit the basics rotating your pics around will definitely increase your hits. Nobody reads profiles it's all about the pics
 

logicallefty

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"Hey how goes it? You have an interesting profile. If you'd like to shoot the sh!t message me before the 32nd of the month "
 

logicallefty

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If she has brown eyes:

"They say the eyes are a glass window into the soul. I can see into yours and I see brown. So Are you full of sh!t or wearing brown contacts? Hit me up if you'd like to chat!"
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Young OG

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I think your opener is to long. Come up with a funny, one sentence opener, that's a question. They will laugh and give you a answer to the question you asked.

I've experimented with lots of different openers on OLD and a funny question always gets the most responses. Unfortunately, I can't give you my opener. Good luck.
 

logicallefty

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"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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xstang77

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There isn't really some magical line to open with, it's either gonna happen or not as long as you use somewhat common sense in the first message. Most of them are self entitled single moms so who wants to pull secondhand garbage anyway. I got bored last week and messaged one for fun to see if i could get a rise out of her and it worked, I ended up getting humor out of it too.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

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