dealing with a girl with ocd?

[PlatoPacks23]

talking with someone who told me she has had OCD for nearly her entire life, something I would not have noticed or even thought of until she had brought it up. she's currently seeing a therapist for it and to me seems super normal and cool

anyone have experience with attracting someone like this? my only thinking is that they are more particular and overthink things, but dont have experience with this sort of thing

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

I wanted to share some things to think about. She's got clinical OCD, dating someone with OCD can be really challenging. Here’s why you might want to think twice:

People with OCD often have rituals they need to follow to manage their anxiety. These can take up a lot of time, which might cut into your plans and daily life. Imagine planning a date and having to wait for her to finish washing her hands multiple times.

OCD isn’t just about quirky habits; it’s about dealing with intense anxiety and stress daily. This can be emotionally draining for both of you. You’ll need to be very patient and understanding, which can be tough, especially if you're not used to dealing with mental health issues.

Her OCD might make it hard for her to do certain things, like going out to crowded places or trying new activities. This could limit the kinds of dates you can go on and might affect your social life together.

It can be hard to understand why she can’t just stop doing certain things or why she gets so anxious. This misunderstanding can lead to frustration and arguments.

You'll need to be flexible and ready to adapt to her needs, which can sometimes feel like you’re constantly walking on eggshells. If you’re not prepared for this level of commitment and understanding, it might cause more stress for both of you.

Protip: do not stick your penis in crazy.

 

[PlatoPacks23]

OCD isn’t just about quirky habits; it’s about dealing with intense anxiety and stress daily. This can be emotionally draining for both of you. You’ll need to be very patient and understanding, which can be tough, especially if you're not used to dealing with mental health issues.

Her OCD might make it hard for her to do certain things, like going out to crowded places or trying new activities. This could limit the kinds of dates you can go on and might affect your social life together.

It can be hard to understand why she can’t just stop doing certain things or why she gets so anxious. This misunderstanding can lead to frustration and arguments.

she is pretty outgoing and social, so I'm not 100% sure if she doesn't like crowded places?

but your points are also making me question the type of thing I'd invite her out too though.. maybe just something simple instead to start?

also keep in mind, I am still in the dark whether she is actually into me or not (or just sees me as a friend)... but perhaps telling her I can be patient and understanding might help?

its tricky, bc based on the things mentioned it almost sounds like I need to be more reactive/acquiescing towards her more than I'd normally be.. but she does appear to like to be told what to do.

 

[BaronOfHair]

talking with someone who told me she has had OCD for nearly her entire life, something I would not have noticed or even thought of until she had brought it up. she's currently seeing a therapist for it and to me seems super normal and cool

You've already made your intentions clear to this chick(You aim to get her in bed), or is this a next door neighbor or co-worker who's sharing all of her woes with you?

 

[PlatoPacks23]

You've already made your intentions clear to this chick(You aim to get her in bed), or is this a next door neighbor or co-worker who's sharing all of her woes with you?

semi social circle thing (see her 2-3 times a week at a class we take) and she hinted at plans for something last time I saw her.

obvs the main thing is its possible she just sees me as a friend, which is why I want to ask her out and just get it going "yes' or "no" 1 way or another before this drags on too long

 

[Rainman4707]

talking with someone who told me she has had OCD for nearly her entire life, something I would not have noticed or even thought of until she had brought it up. she's currently seeing a therapist for it and to me seems super normal and cool

anyone have experience with attracting someone like this? my only thinking is that they are more particular and overthink things, but dont have experience with this sort of thing

It would be quite challenging, if you were to be in a LTR with her. If just banging, don't worry about it.

My friend is in a relationship with a HB8. She looks at him in disgust when he picks his nose. she has to have everything spotless clean. She cannot go anywhere without sanitiser wipes, and that's just the start of it.

 

[BaronOfHair]

semi social circle thing (see her 2-3 times a week at a class we take) and she hinted at plans for something last time I saw her

Sounds like she's already in The Masculine role, and that you're in The Feminine

 

[PlatoPacks23]

Sounds like she's already in The Masculine role, and that you're in The Feminine

ok whatever? last time in a similar situation/class I rushed it and girl wasn't ready yet so this time I took it slower this time

 

[BaronOfHair]

Please, for all of us mortals, I beg you. How did you deduct from that simple statement of facts "semi social circle thing (see her 2-3 times a week at a class we take) and she hinted at plans for something last time I saw her" she is in the masculine rule and he is in the feminine.

SHE seems to be taking the lead, by "hinting at plans" I.E. Taking the lead and setting the tone. Even this assumes that the OP isn't misreading her words and social cues

 

[BackInTheGame78]

The same way you attract any other women. Stop thinking women are different somehow in that way because of whatever "mental issues du jour" is popular at a given time. They all work the same.

Dealing with the behaviors might be different but actually attracting them is not.

 

[PlatoPacks23]

The same way you attract any other women. Stop thinking women are different somehow in that way because of whatever "mental issues du jour" is popular at a given time. They all work the same.

Dealing with the behaviors might be different but actually attracting them is not.

thanks

we will see

 

[Clockwerk50]

My advise will be to stay far away as possible.

OCD women usually are affected by some sort of trauma in their life. Women that have experienced trauma end up with masculine traits where they have to control their environment, people, and destiny in order to cope with their crippling anxiety and panic attacks.

If you get in a relationship with someone with OCD, you are thinking it would be an investment since you can fix this person. However, what most likely will happen is that you will become an enabler and they will become co-depend on you to survive the daily battles with their mental health issues. Think about being an orbiter around her daily life from the early morning until she goes to sleep.

You have been warned.

 

[Clockwerk50]

You'd make a great therapist, you know that?

Thanks. I do see a psychologist and try to learn as much as I can from the techniques he uses. I might seem perfect but in reality, just like everyone else, I have my insecurities, imperfections, vulnerabilities and sometimes might be wrong lol

 

[Clockwerk50]

And you really need to work on detecting sarcasm.

Sarcasm is lowest form of wit. You are better than this.

 

[RangerMIke]

OCD can manifest itself in many ways. Many think if someone has OCD that they are picky about keeping things clean and germ free almost obsessively. But I've known women with OCD who were really sloppy because OCD can manifest as hording or collecting cats or anything really..... One I dated could not leave her apartment without making sure that all her appliances and lamps were unplugged. I dated one that had to work-out every day. One was obsessive about making schedules and lists, another was obsessive about tracking her friends and family.

I have a mild form of OCD, which manifests as obsessively tracking my investments and money. I will spend 30 minutes a day checking all my investments, checking account... changing projections and I am not comfortable until I can project what my finances will be out two years... Give me a date over the next 2 years, and I will tell you exactly how much money should be in my checking account on that day. IMO it is a 'good' form of OCD because it really doesn't affect anyone but me, and it really doesn't take much time every day. But if I don't do this every day from 5:30 AM to 6:00 AM, it will bother me until I can sit down and do this.

I know this is anxiety and my need to control my environment brought on by my childhood being raised by people who always struggled with money. My parents, into retirement were always on the brink of bankruptcy... and this impacted my brothers and sisters since we were always having to pool our resources to get them out of stupid money problems. I do not want my daughters to go through this.

There are different levels... some is really bad... typically with women with REALLY bad OCD will not even date, so you don't have to worry about that. Any women you might date with OCD is likely low level.

It really all depends on how ODC is manifested... if it's something you cannot live with then it's best to just move on.

 

[Divorced w 3]

Back in the day, crazy used to be brought behind the barn and put out of its misery. Today, it gets promoted, a National speaking circuit, and gaslights its audience. I suggest if it’s going to be something you can’t handle, eject - or learn how to lay down hard and firm boundaries and that may involve being really tough

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Back in the day, crazy used to be brought behind the barn and put out of its misery. Today, it gets promoted, a National speaking circuit, and gaslights its audience. I suggest if it’s going to be something you can’t handle, eject - or learn how to lay down hard and firm boundaries and that may involve being really tough

I'm a firm believer part of the reason why things have gotten much worse over time is because the brain is constantly being overstimulated and bombarded all the time every day without a way to get any rest from it.

Social media, texts, TV, billboards, YouTube, Snapchat, TikTok, Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, cell phones, internet, mobile services, etc...

Up until my early 20s, when people left the house that was it. There was no way of getting in contact with them. You had to either leave a message with someone else or leave a VM for them to call when they got back.

Nowadays you just can't escape. You are constantly able to be reached and reach others and I just think it's all too much for the brain to handle on a nonstop 24/7/365 basis decade after decade.

I literally almost feel naked if I leave the house without my phone now, in a way I could never have imagined back then.

 

[FlirtLife]

You'd make a great therapist, you know that?

And you really need to work on detecting sarcasm.

On reddit, the inability to discriminate sarcasm is well-known, which is why people end with "/s" to close off their sarcastic comment.

The earlier post had reasonable advice to avoid a woman whose OCD represents a traumatic past. I don't follow how complimenting reasonable advice should be assumed to be sarcastic. You might have better results with "/s" or "/sarcasm".

 

[PlatoPacks23]

OCD can manifest itself in many ways. Many think if someone has OCD that they are picky about keeping things clean and germ free almost obsessively. But I've known women with OCD who were really sloppy because OCD can manifest as hording or collecting cats or anything really..... One I dated could not leave her apartment without making sure that all her appliances and lamps were unplugged. I dated one that had to work-out every day. One was obsessive about making schedules and lists, another was obsessive about tracking her friends and family.

I have a mild form of OCD, which manifests as obsessively tracking my investments and money. I will spend 30 minutes a day checking all my investments, checking account... changing projections and I am not comfortable until I can project what my finances will be out two years... Give me a date over the next 2 years, and I will tell you exactly how much money should be in my checking account on that day. IMO it is a 'good' form of OCD because it really doesn't affect anyone but me, and it really doesn't take much time every day. But if I don't do this every day from 5:30 AM to 6:00 AM, it will bother me until I can sit down and do this.

your example about investments seems to not be bad whatsoever, person im talking to (as far as I know) seems to have it fairly under control but obsessive about scheduling, being neat etc..

any advice in particular for more mild forms?

 

[RangerMIke]

your example about investments seems to not be bad whatsoever, person im talking to (as far as I know) seems to have it fairly under control but obsessive about scheduling, being neat etc..

any advice in particular for more mild forms?

The reason I consider it obsessive is because I know there is nothing I can do about what is happening with investments... I invest, and then just let it go. I suppose if I was a day trader... checking everyday makes sense. Checking my credit, credit cards balances, and checking account daily I think is something everyone should do because at any time you can become a victim of fraud just to make sure someone hasn't hacked you or stolen your identity.

It would make more sense is I just let my Finacial adviser take care of my investments, then look at it once a quarter, or if I'm planning to make any moves.

I really don't think mild forms of OCD are really a problem, most people have something, just as long as someone's particular thing is not too disruptive... that's okay.