"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Dealing with a girl trying to change you

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Austin Allegro

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Went on a second date last night and this woman is already trying to change me! However I countered it with a good tip.

She ran her fingers through my hair and said I should shave my hair off (I'm going a bit bald). Now back in the AFC day, I would have supplicated and said 'oh really, mmmm, yes, if you think so, ok' etc

Instead I countered it with the things I say to get rid of cold calling salesmen at work.

HER I really think you should shave your head.
ME Thank you for your suggestion, which will be kept on file.
HER (flustered) No, I really think it would look better.
ME I'm currently satisfied with my present style, but should that situation change, I may be back in touch.
HER (even more flustered and looking like a seven year old denied an ice cream) You say all the WRONG things!

I ended up 'making out' with her so it seemed to work ok.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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DJ Alejandro

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what for? you got her by being what you are right now. never change what works.

no one is worth changing for, unless YOU know its for the better.
 
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stealth_iitg

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Hey, you are an Englishman.......listened to Ozzy ever?

"I don't wanna change the world...I don't want the world to change me"......... :))

That said, it's important to let others know that you are open to their suggestions, but at the same time you are confident enough about who you are NOW..........so, as you said, tell 'em that you'll keep their suggestions on file ;-)

Good goin' with that woman.......what's the count, man?
 
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Austin Allegro

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It's an interesting example, because one thing I've learned through management textbooks is that you should praise what you like about someone rather than criticising what you don't like.

Eg. this same girl looks MUCH better in her formal work clothes than in her casual clothes, so instead of saying 'I don't think you should wear combats and a sweater' I said 'you know you look really good in a skirt and jacket'.

Stealth - not sure what you mean, 'what's the count'?
 
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SxyPlayette

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lol well I think that's funny. Some people actually look a whole lot better & much attractive with their har cut and neat, but if shaving means going MJ good luck.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Austin Allegro

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I presume by floored you mean had sex with - 12 at last count, not that it's any business of yours!:D
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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