"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

Dating vs hookup

Foe

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 14, 2021
Messages
241
Reaction score
218
Age
47
This is silly.
She's not your gf, she didn't cheat on you, you're not in a relationship with her.
So much drama for a casual s3x/ connection.
You are essentially doing everything wrong to get what you actually want.

This woman is telling you she only wants a casual/FWB relationship with you. What's the problem with that?

Bang her and then continue dating until you find someone worthy of being in an LTR with. But based on your neediness it seems it will be the first woman that says "yes" to that and not based on any screening criteria from you.
100...and this is why women wonder where the real men are these days.

Men are constantly trying to fill the feminine role instead of the masculine roles with them.
Yeah look I get it guys, if I wanted a casual thing this would have been perfect, there have been times in my life where this is exactly what I wanted and I enjoyed those times. There are times though where casual becomes same/same, bang her enough, bang more woman enough and you get over it, well at least I do. I start to feel like something more. This girl was a great fit for me, so I invested and she didnt, so be it. I found out she was banging another guy and I bailed, if your idea of a real man is to ignore that I would challenge that notion.

I walked away, she might have pulled the trigger but I forced the situation knowing what would happen. Shes messaged a couple of times since but as a "unreal man" Im not going back. She wants to f$#k other guys behind my back then she can go find some "real men" who are comfortable with this.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

Solomon

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 28, 2008
Messages
6,548
Reaction score
4,109
Location
Inside her mind
So just started seeing this girl, she's been pretty light on time availability and apart from some restaurants we haven't really done any "dating" per say. Each time I try and setup something decent she tends to counter with coming over later at night and banging.

Now dont get me wrong there has been times in my life where this would be ideal but after smashing randos for the last few months Im kinda over it. Wouldnt mind something with a bit more substance. Not really getting a reading off this girl though, not sure if she's keen or just in it for the sex.

I've removed myself from dating apps, cut off my black book ties and trying to focus on this girl but it seems like its having a reverse effect. The more interest I show the more she seems disinterested. Any tips.
I'm curious OP how old is she?
 
Top