Dating in germany as a male with russian roots

[summersky]

I was a child when we migrated to germany, I have russian roots. I am 173 cm tall and would say that I am average looking but I look different than the most germans. Due to my russian roots I have a wide forehead and a wide midface. The most people I meet can immediately tell that I am not a german and tell me I look russian. I was bullied a lot because I look different and I know some germans have a bad opinion about people from russia. Never had much success with german girls and I think it is because of my "different" looks. Most german girls go for german guys I think. Not many go for russian guys. I had much more success with black, asian, russian and ukrainian girls. But there are not that many of them here. When I tell friends about my experiences, they say that it has nothing to do with my "different" looks and that I have equal chances with german girls. But I think there is some truth to my assumptions. What do you think?

Thinking about moving to another country or going for escorts for the rest of my life.

Regards
summersky

 

[BackInTheGame78]

More so because you lack confidence in yourself than anything else I would suspect.

 

[summersky]

That's what my friends also say but why do I have success with foreign girls and none with german girls?

 

[Clockwerk50]

For most people, having things in common matters more than being different. Shared language, culture, humor, upbringing, and values make people feel more comfortable and connected. So if these German women aren't especially attracted to foreigners, being Russian by itself probably won't give you much of an advantage. Unless you're bringing something else to the table besides being different, your background alone probably won't create attraction. Most people are looking for someone whose personality complements their own or fulfills an emotional need, not simply someone who is foreign.

There is only a small group of people in any community who actively seek out what's foreign or exotic. They often become fascinated with people from other cultures because they see them as exciting, different, or an escape from the ordinary and their lifes. They tend to project fantasies onto foreigners, valuing the idea of them as much as the person themselves. Again, if you're not naturally fitting into that “exotic” image for them, or if these German women aren't wired that way, then your background won't carry much weight on its own.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

That's what my friends also say but why do I have success with foreign girls and none with german girls?

Because you have created a self fulfilling prophecy for yourself.

Your belief system causes your subconscious mind to find ways to achieve what you believe in that regard so you are likely doing things differently without noticing in those situations and causing yourself worse results because of it.

 

[OngBak]

Chances are low for you to compete there if you aren't high value. Germany is a Place, where you would have to compete with many high value guys and woman there can sniff it out pretty quickly if you are one or not. They are strongly educated and have high but realistic expectations

 

[Gamisch]

Thats bogus

If anything Germany is THE border between west and east Europe ( remember Berlin wall?). Most lets say Americans would be hard pressed to distinguish a german from a Russian just by looks.

It's YOU. And even if you want prostitution, 30 / 40 euro a pop...won't get much cheaper than chilling in das laufhaus mein freund.

 

[plumber]

I was a child when we migrated to germany, I have russian roots. I am 173 cm tall and would say that I am average looking but I look different than the most germans. Due to my russian roots I have a wide forehead and a wide midface. The most people I meet can immediately tell that I am not a german and tell me I look russian. I was bullied a lot because I look different and I know some germans have a bad opinion about people from russia. Never had much success with german girls and I think it is because of my "different" looks. Most german girls go for german guys I think. Not many go for russian guys. I had much more success with black, asian, russian and ukrainian girls. But there are not that many of them here. When I tell friends about my experiences, they say that it has nothing to do with my "different" looks and that I have equal chances with german girls. But I think there is some truth to my assumptions. What do you think?

Thinking about moving to another country or going for escorts for the rest of my life.

Regards
summersky

maybe you have some idea already of what and why. and don't know what to do about it. what have you been doing to improve ??

 

[BaronOfHair]

...I know some germans have a bad opinion about people from russia

Stop by The US, if you're eager to see how low that opinion can REALLY go. Sad to read you've had difficulties, at any rate

 

[Tilex]

As an outsider from the US, I find both Germans and Russians to be very reserved. Maybe you need to open up more.
Two very reserved cultures don't mesh well.

 

[JohnBee]

Your experience actually points toward a clear strategy: stop fishing in the wrong pond. If you consistently have better chemistry and more success with Russian, Ukrainian, Asian, and Black women, that is real data about where your genuine compatibility lies, not a consolation prize.

For serious relationships, apps and platforms with strong international user bases give you access to women who aren't filtering through whatever local bias exists in Germany. Many Russian and Ukrainian women living across Europe are also open to men who share cultural background, which gives you a natural conversation foundation beyond just looks.

One caution: when pursuing women from Eastern Europe online specifically, romance scam rates are high. Always video-call early, verify the person is consistent across multiple conversations, and never send money regardless of the story. Genuine women interested in real relationships won't pressure you financially.

 

[Bigpapa]

I was a child when we migrated to germany, I have russian roots. I am 173 cm tall and would say that I am average looking but I look different than the most germans. Due to my russian roots I have a wide forehead and a wide midface. The most people I meet can immediately tell that I am not a german and tell me I look russian. I was bullied a lot because I look different and I know some germans have a bad opinion about people from russia. Never had much success with german girls and I think it is because of my "different" looks. Most german girls go for german guys I think. Not many go for russian guys. I had much more success with black, asian, russian and ukrainian girls. But there are not that many of them here. When I tell friends about my experiences, they say that it has nothing to do with my "different" looks and that I have equal chances with german girls. But I think there is some truth to my assumptions. What do you think?

Thinking about moving to another country or going for escorts for the rest of my life.

Regards
summersky

I think that there are 2 issues here

firstly, your mindset I think is cooked. And even though you might have reasons to have this mindset, the path forward is to change it

secondly, being kinda on the short side of height ( Germans are reasonably tall ) + average looking + look different is not ideal

the good side of the thing is that you can still improve your appearance by improving your style

all in all, I think is a bit of an uphill battle in Germany. Maybe makes more sense to move to Poland / baltics?

but even if you decide to move you still have to upgrade your mindset + improve your style