Dating an ABC

[TheMoonMonst3r]

Im a white guy and Ive been with a ABC girl for 7 months now. I was just wondering if there are other guys out there in my situation or a support group or something to talk about all the retarded little things she does.

 

[true romance]

what is ABC ?

 

[bhsdt97]

Wait,when you say ABC do you mean American Born Chinese?
If so..then I've never been in your position before.
However, I do have experience with what people commonly refer to as ABCDS(American Born Confused Desis).

 

[TheMoonMonst3r]

ABC = American Born Chinese

 

[true romance]

what retarded things? more details

 

[TheMoonMonst3r]

1) At dim sum (chinese tea-lunch) with her parents the other day, I took a little sticky-rice wrap (there were four...). Apparently I was supposed to share that with everyone else instead of taking my own. She said later in the car that that's the type of thing might make her parents think "Oh he's just a dumb white guy, he will never adapt to our culture". I was like WTF

2) She gave me a sob-story yesterday about how she's a minority and what it's like to feel hated...blah blah blah. I said sorry for all that stuff she's experienced. But I lived in China for 3.5 months with her, where I was the only white person within a 5 mile radius. She said that's different, cuz everyone likes me over there.

3) She seriously ****ing burnt popcorn in my house, and now my house smells funky.

 

[true romance]

I dont see these things as roadblock...cultural difference..does these issues bother you a lot?
what do you want with this girl ?
Bang?
if she hot and fun
Continue to seduce, flirt have fun...
ignore the rest

1) watch before you jump..so let her take inititative when you are at dinner/dim sum ..observe for next time

2) If she feel hated, give her love that she needs..

3) she burnt popcorn..make her clean you kitchen in bikini...

 

[Ken785]

How old are you? You gotta try to adapt to Asian culture...after 7 months has she not taught you anything? In Asian culture you have to be super respectful. Its different then American. If it bothers you so much you gotta weigh things out whether you want to stay with this girl or not.

If the problems outweigh the good things in the relationship...then you need to leave the relationship. Things like this will occur if you date races outside of your cultural background so learn to adapt or just date white girls.

 

[Being_the_Don]

Im a white guy and Ive been with a ABC girl for 7 months now. I was just wondering if there are other guys out there in my situation or a support group or something to talk about all the retarded little things she does.

Maybe you want an FOB. :crackup: Actually a lot AFs are high maintenance and feel entitled so if you don't like it just dump them.

 

[ready123]

if he's crying over popcorn, I don't think he'd be able to handle a fob

 

[TheMoonMonst3r]

She is the first Asian girl Ive been with, and I've been with ~10 other white American/European girls previously. Backpacking around Asia had such a profound experience on my life...especially China, and I would like to continue the culture I learned over there and adapt to be good boyfriend, whatever she sees that as. I am learning a lot of 國語 (Mandarin) and Chinese culture (I was there for fuggin 3.5 months..), but it really disappointing when she says stuff like "you will never fit in, you are just like the other dumb 外國人 (white ppl)".

Any ABCs or white guys who have dated ABCs to clue me in? Or does it not even matter?

 

[Papermoon]

A friend of mine is Asian. Her boyfriend did a very wise thing: he approached the parents. Introduced himself, and then told them that he knew very little of their culture, especially when it came to daily habits. So he told them, that if he ever did anything wrong, or they felt irritated by his behaviour, they should simply ask him about it.

They did and they never had much problems. Most of the time, if he does something they find weird, they'll laugh about it and that's it. They accept him, because he showed respect.

My advice: talk to the parents. And research the region her parents are from.