"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Date Tonight and Question...

golf299

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 1, 2002
Messages
417
Reaction score
1
Location
STL
i've got a date tonight (first one) with a girl i've casually known for a few months. here's how the date came about:

i asked her out for last weekend, but she was already busy and had to counter-offer for this weekend. that's fine. then early last week she said she wanted to talk about the prospect of us going out...

we talked and she voiced some certain concerns and said she wanted a couple weeks to think it over before she made her decision, and that she was sorry to leave me hanging like that. apparently she has had some bad relationships in the past and doens't know if she's ready for another one yet...

at that point, the date for this weekend was still up in the air. she said she'd tell me later in the week if she would take me up on my offer. well, she called the next day to accept.

i'm a bit confused as to whether her acceptance of the date in any way nullifies the two weeks she needs to think it over or not.

1) should i bring that up?
2) what can i do to make her decision easier, as in: giving this a chance?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Desdinova

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 15, 2004
Messages
11,680
Reaction score
4,874
Sounds like she may have given you a 5hit test, and you passed it. Not sure what you did right.

Anyway, when you go on your date, don't focus on her past relationships. Focus on going out with her and having fun! Make sure she has a damn good time. She'll be glad that she decided to accept your offer.
 

Doctor Who

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 30, 2005
Messages
30
Reaction score
0
Location
Maryland
You have to give us the report.

Hopefully it went well. Her counter offer, and the fact that she did actually accept were good signs.

Response to the first question: I would not have brought it up, since that would show insecurity.

Response to the 2nd question: Dont think about her motivation. Just have a good time. If you are compatible, and give off the right vibe, it will just click naturally. If you are constantly worrying about how she feels, then you are going to come off as nervous.

Hopefully your date went well.
 

Julian

Banned
Joined
Jul 30, 2003
Messages
4,754
Reaction score
1,216
Wtf ur going out for coffee, you already did something wrong if this chick is saying she doesnt know if she wants to get into a relationship with you.

Wtf
 

golf299

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 1, 2002
Messages
417
Reaction score
1
Location
STL
UPDATE

the date went well, everything went smoothly. we both had fun, and i could tell that she was being kinda shy.

i did not bring up the 2-week wait period bit.

after we ate, i took her home. she invited me up to her place. i stayed for maybe an hour and then excused myself. i didn't want to over-extend my stay.

at the end i really was wanting to kiss her but opted not to. it's just that i didn't want to push her before she was ready. i suppose that i'll just wait for the 2-weeks she needs to come to a conclusion and see what happens then...
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

Top