"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Date night … she suggested coming over and watching a movie. Am in her frame ?

Lover_boy

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So I made plans on Tuesday to hang out with this chick I’ve been dating to go out dancing on Saturday night. She said she’d be down but this morning she sends me a text that she’s in the mood to disconnect and relax and do something chill.
She said maybe “I can come over and we can watch a movie and chill” and that she’s in the mood to smoke and wine down.

I was In the mood for dancing, having fun and getting drunk but if she’s suggesting these plans. If I follow through with them does that mean I’m following her frame ? We haven’t kissed yet so…

thoughts ?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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devilkingx2

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It almost literally sounds like she's communicating "you can skip the dates I'm almost DTF already"

If you want to get drunk and dance you can still play music and pour shots at your house
 

BillyPilgrim

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Have you sexted or had any sexual communication yet?
 

Billtx49

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She said maybe “I can come over and we can watch a movie and chill” and that she’s in the mood to smoke and wine down.

If I follow through with them does that mean I’m following her frame ?
She’s telling you she’s DTF after a few drinks and/or smoke to loosen her up. Small c0cktail hour talk over a few drinks, couch time movie watching for the purpose of body closeness, kissing, and kino, while escalating her to the bedroom.
If a woman is in this frame, I’m in her frame for the evening also, and that’s Always fine with me.…
Seduce her
 

BillyPilgrim

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She’s telling you she’s DTF after a few drinks and/or smoke to loosen her up. Small ****tail talk over a few drinks, couch time movie watching for the purpose of body closeness, kissing, and kino, while escalating her to the bedroom.
This is only true 90% of the time (that's she's DTF or open to it with reasonably good game). It's still worthwhile to try and make sure that she isn't in that other 10%, because some women are big fans of false or easily misconstrued signaling. There's a reason why OP felt compelled to make this thread.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Billtx49

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This is only true 90% of the time (that's she's DTF or open to it with reasonably good game). It's still worthwhile to try and make sure that she isn't in that other 10%, because some women are big fans of false or easily misconstrued signaling. There's a reason why OP felt compelled to make this thread.
He doesn’t know that until he gives it a shot. Only their interaction tells the story there…
 

BillyPilgrim

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No, only danced really sensual and grinded
Is she Catholic? If yes and she's 27+, the chances are the odds of scoring are lower than if she isn't.
 

Lover_boy

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We left off earlier today that I would pick her up tonight and we’ll ride to my place and then decide what we will do (either chill at my place or go out dancing).

Should I ask her what she’s more in the mood for or just proceed with date night at my place ?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

Billtx49

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We left off earlier today that I would pick her up tonight and we’ll ride to my place and then decide what we will do (either chill at my place or go out dancing).

Should I ask her what she’s more in the mood for or just proceed with date night at my place ?
It’s about what You want to do. Do you want to dance again or smash ass ?
The mans leads
 

BillyPilgrim

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…. Smash
You've already been out dancing with her before it sounds like. Time to mix it up. Just make sure she's aware that romance is on the agenda (if you're able to effectively subcommunicate it without looking pushy).

More than likely you'll be ok but ideally there should be an "early frame announcement" from either of you to kinda make sure you're both on the same page.
 
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EyeBRollin

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It’s about what You want to do. Do you want to dance again or smash ass ?
The mans leads
Disagree.

OP, you need to read the room. This chick is telling you loud and clear to skip the dates and get to smashing. Go along with her idea. You can go dancing next date after you bang her.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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BillyPilgrim

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For example, if you're going to be smoking weed with her, talk about CBD and how great CBD oil is for massages. See how she responds.
 

BillyPilgrim

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Disagree.

OP, you need to read the room. This chick is telling you loud and clear to skip the dates and get to smashing. Go along with her idea. You can go dancing next date after you bang her.
This room is a tad hazy though. The "loud and clear" isn't quite at full volume and clarity. There is still that 10% who will use this reasonable assumption to play games.
 

Billtx49

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Disagree.

OP, you need to read the room. This chick is telling you loud and clear to skip the dates and get to smashing. Go along with her idea. You can go dancing next date after you bang her.
Yep, read #4 post.
 

The Duke

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Is she even comfortable dancing? Some chics claimed they were but months later the truth came out.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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