"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Date ideas...
- Thread starter Htienvu
- Start date
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
JohnnyStrabler
Don Juan
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I need some date ideas since Valentine's Day is right around the corner and its cold outside lol
So, if you like bowling go bowling or if you like ice skating go ice skating. It's hard to give advice since we don't really know you interests but something to remember is to be active in a date and not just sitting around, especially in the beginning.
Some ideas could be: Laser tag, wine tasting, Hibatchi (however, you spell it), museums, indoor activity places have mountain climbing sometimes, concerts, plays, sporting events, and the list goes on
Huffman
Master Don Juan
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My favourite is Drinks, and later Pool Billard. Starts of low key, and lots of kino opportunities later. Also it's good for an evening and you don't have to hang around her all Saturday
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
i love my bf
ridiculousely love my bf right now.
your dates are depressing.
especially the let her tag along thing. sounds like what a 8yo would say. Being closed on his own world and allowing a girlt to come in, as long as sh makes and effort to fit in.^^so childish.
it's something you do together. Do something fun and cool. Bowling is not cool. karting is stupid for a date, so is skating or iceskating, you guys like cheesy things don't you. Like you have a high tolerence to things youve seen in cheesy movies/series again and again. I don't. I want something no cliche ( or only as a joke) but not trying to be too original either, something free from the "date" prejudice, something free minded. Like: we don't care we do whatever comes up. We will be together so thats cool.
example: all we want is making our in out underwear? let's grab a bottle, go home and do that ( and not go bowling)
if we feel like seeing beauty, let's go to a Courbet exhibition. We want to cuddle in the dark and you could possibly touch me under my skirt/I could give you a handjob: let's go watch a movie.
we want to drink beers and talk: Let's go to a pool bar/irish pub.
we want to err be cold and cheesy and get a cold: let's go iceskatting.
you want to tell me you love me for the first time and want to make it as cheesy and memorable as possible: take me to one of the most beautiful square in paris, covered in snow, drag me in the middle of the scare where i have snow above my hankles, take me head between your hands and tell me, "baby? we are in the cheesiest spot in paris to say that and i love you" ( yeah mine did it and it was pretty unforgettable and funny, and pretty beautiful)
you get the point.
but it should be something you both want. don't be like i go there, if you want to come you can, but yeah i don't really need you to go. Make you seem retarded ( by that i mean with the social skill of a 10 yo at most)
Huffman
Master Don Juan
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Did it fit in your head that the above suggestions were for first/second dates with people you hardly even know? Your dates are good for when you're already in a relationship, I give you that, but trying these too early would just scare the girls away. Like cuddling in the dark or making out in your underwear. So for me a first date must be something that is short and fun, and not too heavy. If you know her for some time already then of course you can do some of your stuff.
I agree though that karting is very strange, it's expensive and is only fun in a group anyway!
no you're wrongHuffman said:
yeah thats what i was talking about. The first date i ever had with my bf was after a party in saturday. He came to pick me up and we went at his and got into our underwear and dance and talk and laugh, and play hide and seek in his house ( has a huge one in paris, it's like a building, because of his parents functions there) and then we made out on his bed, got very horny but decided to not do anything and fall asleep. The day after we went to see and exhibition of courbet. 1st and second date exactly.
once again, it doesn't mean it happens with everyguy, we were incredibly attracted to each other and felt a real connection very fast. Was pretty special.
but i'd imagine that thoughlessness is fun in any situation. I guess i'd enjoy doing this stuff with a guy i like. IT's natural thus different, especially in the us where everybody is so stuck to their cliches.
and you remark about karting being too expensive makes me think that unless you're 18, you must be a loser, sorry to seem arch, just the impression i get. Try to not say that kind of stuffs in front a girl.
just forget abou the whole concept of date. Be honest with each other, just do what you want. You will be surprise that if you actually like the girl you will want to do other things that having sex and also even if it's not the case you have natural needs like eating. So you will go out and eat and you also like untertainment so you will do many stuffs together and sir this how: you get to know each other.
but just be honest with each other. You want to do her. Just be honest about it. Not saying it but in the things you will do with her. Going bowling when all you want is to escalate is a pretty silly detour. Makes no sense.
i noticed around me and in my own experience that the best relationship start being very sexual mentally. You want each other badly and you're opened about it. Doesn't mean the girl is a slut or something. Slut are sexual girls that only have that so she just keep lining up short term affairs, girls you will love like hell=sexual sensual girl that have much more than that ( not slut because in general if they dont fall for anyone and guys stick around when they do).
Sex fantaszed or had is the common denominator. So i understand you can't just bend her over out of nowhere but:: bowling??? you might want to think twice about that.
SharinganUser
Master Don Juan
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ewwww i hate jagermiester, and hotel rooms are too gloomy. I prefer my place or his. We have our stuffs, we can share, we can raid his fridge and make crepes. Fall asleep in our bed, It's real and personal, it's not forced, not planned, we can do whatever we want. EVen saying bye and **** off home at any moment.SharinganUser said:
im aware you were probbably joking but i figured i could answer anyway
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Only a dutch word could describe what I want to do to you...BBbardot said:
I would seriously "Swaffel" you in the face for a fvcking hour until you sh*t the fvck up... Seriously, why is this AW (just so you understand attention Wh0re) lurking here...
@OP: learn to use the search tool man...
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=115616
Look at post #4
bluenorther
Senior Don Juan
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
WhitePimp
Master Don Juan
Huffman
Master Don Juan
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I won't blindly bash you because you do actually make some points, like with being spontaneous and everything.
i went there because i liked him. A lot. Yeah usually you can figure those things pretty fast. And i knew nothing bad could happen to me in a godamn embassy.Htienvu said:
I'm pretty sure that if it worked on me, It would work on many girls. Sponteinity is a turn on. BE spointenious, like actually be and you will see, spointenity is contagious.