damn i need some serious advice!~

[In2theGame]

you were right though...she had been attracted to him...and that's exactly how i felt too...why would she bring me those stuff when sometimes i would tell her to come over to my place and she wouldn't cuz she had to go home cuz of her parents...plus when she gave the food to me she was in a hurry...i'm thinking she feels guilty too that's why she's been acting that way...maybe she just couldn't turn the offer down from the guy since they were in the same class and she doesn't want me to know...idk...ugh!~

Vagrant, come on man, look at yourself.. your stressing for NOTHING. Things you should stress on is paying the rent, your mom being sick, not being able to find employment... Girls.. Nothing to stress over because there are billions of them out there and your stressing one out of a billion. relax man.

 

[vagrant]

Honestly, Vagrant.. I understand what your feeling. You just wanna find out whats going out before making any decisions about your relationship. Thats understandable but snooping around might just lead to heartbreak anyway. It's funny because every guy that has questions or problems like this, I have been there and i have learned the HARD way. Why should she wanna study with this guy anyway? She can study alone. Oh what, she HAS! to study with him? I assume your young and there are so many girls out there. Girls will try to string you like a puppet as long as they can but your cant string a puppet with no strings. You let her know they you dont like her studying with this guy and if she goes against what you say.. then thats your answer right there.

i know what you're saying but the thing is i know she will not tell me the truth...she loves me i know and doesn't want to ruin us...but like every relationship we had out ups and DOWNS...lately it's been hard for both of us...honestly i don't have a job and i don't have a lot of friends but i'm a good looking guy...i mean i wouldn't have any problems getting chicks cuz everyday i'm getting offered in every corner...the thing is my sister's in cali and i'm in new york...i'm babysitting my sister's son and i go to school...i just never had the time to go out to keep friends or even have a part time job...now school just ended and i'm pretty much home all day babysitting...skating in the afternoon or working out a little...everytime we talk on the phone i don't have anything to tell her...everytime she calls i'd pick up within seconds...i have nothing to do...i can't get myself busy...i don't have money...i don't even have a car...i know all that will change this june when i move to cali with my whole family...i'm ready to experience what the world has to offer...but right now...yeah you can say i will bore you to death with the life i have right now though i can keep you on your toes with my skating tricks hehe!~

 

[tmpgstx]

She's not into you right now. She is very focused on this SAT thing and studying with this guy. This guy becomes a part of that focus.

You need to get her admitting that she is attracted to him by first admitting that you are attracted to other girls but have not acted on it.

Once she admits, she'll tell you alot more about him and how he's trying to get with her. Now this gives her a more common ground with you and he becomes the bad guy. Tell her that she is a nice looking girl and that is to be expected.

It's a game of smoke and mirrors but it works. Once you are a bit older, you'll better understand how the Female mind works. This is the solution to this little problem you have here.

 

[vagrant]

EVERYONE Start CLAPPING for VAGRANT!! :cheer: :cheer: :cheer:
Be Glad it might be over. She is not ever girl out there and i will bet $1 Trillion Dollars there is a girl out there ALOT HOTTER, ALOT SEXIER and with ALOT BETTER PERSONALITY than what you have now. TRUST! ME!! this is a good thing. Dont call her anymore. she is playing games and acting stupid.

She is probably thinking hmm... ill hold on to Vagrant until something happens with this guy. Until then ill hold out.

well it would be stupid on my part to end a good relationship which i think it is besides the fact that she might be seeing someone else...i just need to see them together both on the same spot...believe me...she is hot, sexy, and just one incredible chick but i can move on and i will move on if everything is true...though it would hunt me for days having thought of other guys doing her like there's no tomorrow...makes me sick to my stomach btw...damn...having nothing to do makes you think a lot of stupid stuff...ugh!~

 

[tmpgstx]

i know what you're saying but the thing is i know she will not tell me the truth...she loves me i know and doesn't want to ruin us...but like every relationship we had out ups and DOWNS...lately it's been hard for both of us...honestly i don't have a job and i don't have a lot of friends but i'm a good looking guy...i mean i wouldn't have any problems getting chicks cuz everyday i'm getting offered in every corner...the thing is my sister's in cali and i'm in new york...i'm babysitting my sister's son and i go to school...i just never had the time to go out to keep friends or even have a part time job...now school just ended and i'm pretty much home all day babysitting...skating in the afternoon or working out a little...everytime we talk on the phone i don't have anything to tell her...everytime she calls i'd pick up within seconds...i have nothing to do...i can't get myself busy...i don't have money...i don't even have a car...i know all that will change this june when i move to cali with my whole family...i'm ready to experience what the world has to offer...but right now...yeah you can say i will bore you to death with the life i have right now though i can keep you on your toes with my skating tricks hehe!~

That explains it. You don't show any market value. This other guy does. Simply by taking the SAT with her shows her he has more market value. You don't seem to have any goals, and she feels above you.

Better change this tune quick, or it's over for you.

 

[In2theGame]

i know what you're saying but the thing is i know she will not tell me the truth...she loves me i know and doesn't want to ruin us...but like every relationship we had out ups and DOWNS...lately it's been hard for both of us...honestly i don't have a job and i don't have a lot of friends but i'm a good looking guy...i mean i wouldn't have any problems getting chicks cuz everyday i'm getting offered in every corner...the thing is my sister's in cali and i'm in new york...i'm babysitting my sister's son and i go to school...i just never had the time to go out to keep friends or even have a part time job...now school just ended and i'm pretty much home all day babysitting...skating in the afternoon or working out a little...everytime we talk on the phone i don't have anything to tell her...everytime she calls i'd pick up within seconds...i have nothing to do...i can't get myself busy...i don't have money...i don't even have a car...i know all that will change this june when i move to cali with my whole family...i'm ready to experience what the world has to offer...but right now...yeah you can say i will bore you to death with the life i have right now though i can keep you on your toes with my skating tricks hehe!~

New York? Cool. What Borough? I Live here. IF she seems like shes getting distant, from experience, its a bad sign all the way.

 

[In2theGame]

well it would be stupid on my part to end a good relationship which i think it is besides the fact that she might be seeing someone else...i just need to see them together both on the same spot...believe me...she is hot, sexy, and just one incredible chick but i can move on and i will move on if everything is true...though it would hunt me for days having thought of other guys doing her like there's no tomorrow...makes me sick to my stomach btw...damn...having nothing to do makes you think a lot of stupid stuff...ugh!~

Why do you need to see them together? she wont let that happen. U wanna talk about hurt? My EX did me so dirty, i was crying alone in my room for months! and on top of it.. While i was in my bed alone at 3am crying i knew she was sucking another guys D*ck at that very moment. I felt like my heart was gonna explode. it didnt just hurt, I was Painful. I was with her for 4 years and out of the blue, she tells me she needs some time alone. i later found out she was F--cking this guy every night. Then she had the NERVE!! 3 months later to ask me if we can be together again.

 

[vagrant]

That explains it. You don't show any market value. This other guy does. Simply by taking the SAT with her shows her he has more market value. You don't seem to have any goals, and she feels above you.

Better change this tune quick, or it's over for you.

i do have A LOT of goals...but it's not happening right now that i'm here in new york with a 5 yr kid wherever i go...i try to keep myself busy skating and working out in the house...lately i got back playing video games and just trying to read a lot of good stuff from the internet just cuz i don't have anything to do...our house is so clean...my mom's car's so clean...which she left me cuz she's in another country with my bro...i even cleaned the engine...i've been watching a lot of boxing fights on tv...but yeah, you're right...right now i don't have that market value...LOOKS definitely is NOT enough!...you gotta have the PERSONALITY...the LIFE...that other girls will chase you for and that will make the girl you have right now fight for!~

 

[vagrant]

New York? Cool. What Borough? I Live here. IF she seems like shes getting distant, from experience, its a bad sign all the way.

rockland county...30 minutes away from nyc!~

 

[Last Man Standing]

You need to get her admitting that she is attracted to him by first admitting that you are attracted to other girls but have not acted on it.

Bad idea!!!

It may be nothing at all - your dire lonely desperate condition may be conjuring up things that aren't there!

Don't ask her straight-out if she is interested in him. As someone else said - look for other signs - like, if her panties are dripping wet after seeing him at the library or if she has her shirt inside out - obvious clues!!

 

[tmpgstx]

It's funny the guy's that know the most about girls have been through some terrible episodes (myself included). Maybe it's our drive to understand such incredibly selfish behavior. We look for and identify problem patterns that are way to common. This is another one of those textbook about-to-cheat (if she hasn't already) situations. The pattern is very clear. There should be no ambiguity.

Having a very hot girlfriend always entails this as she is constantly hit on, day in and day out. Her emotions are governed by many guys tugging her in their direction, for the sole purpose of tapping that ass. She doesn't think like a man so this is oblivious to her. She thinks most of them geniunely like her for who she is and want to be with her. If she was an HB6, do you think you'd be facing the same problem? No, of course not.

 

[In2theGame]

It's funny the guy's that know the most about girls have been through some terrible episodes (myself included). Maybe it's our drive to understand such incredibly selfish behavior. We look for and identify problem patterns that are way to common. This is another one of those textbook about-to-cheat (if she hasn't already) situations. The pattern is very clear. There should be no ambiguity.

Having a very hot girlfriend always entails this as she is constantly hit on, day in and day out. Her emotions are governed by many guys tugging her in their direction, for the sole purpose of tapping that ass. She doesn't think like a man so this is oblivious to her. She thinks most of them geniunely like her for who she is and want to be with her. If she was an HB6, do you think you'd be facing the same problem? No, of course not.

tmpgstx, That was an excellent post and a very true one. I myself have been through such heartache and such saddness that if it werent for my friends, i would have gone crazy but i am so happy it happened to me. You cant understand unless you pass through the fire and once you go through the hell that a girl puts you through, Then you can look back and say "Yes, now i understand what was going on". Every guy must go through that hard time in order to know women.

 

[tmpgstx]

Bad idea!!!

It may be nothing at all - your dire lonely desperate condition may be conjuring up things that aren't there!

Don't ask her straight-out if she is interested in him. As someone else said - look for other signs - like, if her panties are dripping wet after seeing him at the library or if she has her shirt inside out - obvious clues!!

I didn't say come right out and ask .. said get her to admit by first saying that you have been interested in other girls. You never want to appear desparate, but sorry to say LMS, looking for clues is to late for Vagrant.

The signs are obvious as several of us have been through something strikingly similar. The way to save it, if at all, is to identify with her and make him out to be the bad guy for *trying* to get with her. Think of it like BF destroying, but he is not the BF, you are! You are just reversing it.

 

[vagrant]

Why do you need to see them together? she wont let that happen. U wanna talk about hurt? My EX did me so dirty, i was crying alone in my room for months! and on top of it.. While i was in my bed alone at 3am crying i knew she was sucking another guys D*ck at that very moment. I felt like my heart was gonna explode. it didnt just hurt, I was Painful. I was with her for 4 years and out of the blue, she tells me she needs some time alone. i later found out she was F--cking this guy every night. Then she had the NERVE!! 3 months later to ask me if we can be together again.

aaaah sh!t...i feel you man...that's some hard sh!t you've been through...real HARD!...something that can get you really bad specially if you're weak like my bro who started using drugs cuz of the girl that just used her...you can say i'm pretty weak too when it comes to sh!t like this but i'm blessed that i was born with a little hot badass look to compensate for the little game i have...experience really killed me...i just lack a lot of it...you know when they say education is something no one else can take away from you and not like money where you can loose it...well basically it all comes down to EXPERIENCE...it's the only thing that everyone of us will take wherever we go...to cali or to heaven that no one else can take...it's HER lost though... a big one too...cuz right now i'm full of energy and goals...no way i'll be a loser...no way i'm wasting my life...the present is a gift...it's a gift...btw i just want to end it in person...just to be sure too that i'm not just smokin crack!~

 

[tmpgstx]

I hear ya In2theGame, a very, very painful experience indeed.

Vagrant, here is what i gather she is perceiving you as based on what you have said:

* A video gamer
* A Skate Boarder
* No car
* No job

Not that these are bad things, but unappealing to a girl for the most part. Especially one about to go off to college etc.

It's all good, but as girl gets older (if she's remotely healthy self-esteem wise) will be looking for a guy who can support her and a baby (e.g. in other words his income would be good enough for the both of them while she's tending to the baby).

Status brings this to the table, or at least perceived status. Perceived status would be that you're going places in life and will be a good future provider if necessary.

 

[Last Man Standing]

Did I miss something - I don't see the obvious "clues"?

Although I do believe that if Vagrant is sensing hints of deceit and guile then he should investigate further - men's intuition is usually right in this matter - but I don't see the obvious clues.

 

[vagrant]

I hear ya In2theGame, a very, very painful experience indeed.

Vagrant, here is what i gather she is perceiving you as based on what you have said:

* A video gamer
* A Skate Boarder
* No car
* No job

Not that these are bad things, but unappealing to a girl for the most part. Especially one about to go off to college etc.

It's all good, but as girl gets older (if she's remotely healthy self-esteem wise) will be looking for a guy who can support her and a baby (e.g. in other words his income would be good enough for the both of them while she's tending to the baby).

Status brings this to the table, or at least perceived status. Perceived status would be that you're going places in life and will be a good future provider if necessary.

that's exactly it...she might even feel that her boyfriend is a looser with no job and no car who stays home all day babysitting...she must be thinking she's missin a whole lot of guys out there...i know what you're saying though...i understand completely...i just hate the fact that i keep thinking that i can't find another girl better than her cuz if i look at it she was a GREAT girlfriend...well not exactly for her grand finale!~

 

[vagrant]

Did I miss something - I don't see the obvious "clues"?

Although I do believe that if Vagrant is sensing hints of deceit and guile then he should investigate further - men's intuition is usually right in this matter - but I don't see the obvious clues.

i told her good luck on her SATs...she didn't say anything as if she was feeling guilty...wouldn't you say...THANKS BABY and sh!t like that?...dude...ugh...i don't know i'm still hoping i'm wrong cuz i definitely have oneitis for this girl but i can feel it...i can feel it!~

 

[In2theGame]

Did I miss something - I don't see the obvious "clues"?

Although I do believe that if Vagrant is sensing hints of deceit and guile then he should investigate further - men's intuition is usually right in this matter - but I don't see the obvious clues.

Good Point but Saddly, sometimes the obvious wont be so obvious until the end.

 

[tmpgstx]

You may have not been through something like this then LMS. Be glad you haven't lol. I've been through it three times. Each time, the pattern is the same.

- Girl tries to suppress guilt by appeasing you

Case in Point: One ex that was about to cheat - she'd be extra nice giving me things and extra out of the ordinary attention before going on that trip to see her sister, which i no doubt found out later was, seeing a guy in the same city. My *intuition* told me she was cheating, but did not want to believe it.

Vagrant's gf is running food over to him (not usual as he stated) and writing love notes about him on MySpace. At the same time, she is showing no sexual interest (is distant), and is about to study with a guy for the SAT. Some hours involved there with this new guy.

She told him about the guy, and that he is just a *friend* that she'll be studying with. Never good, Vagrant hasn't even met him!

It's like shyte on a shoe, when putting these things together, no wonder he feels he's losing her.

Based on bad experiences, these things are not good in the least bit.