Well, i've been stuck in the LJBF zone for a while with this particular girl, and am ready to move on. The problem is that she thinks of me as her "best guy-friend" and i don't want to be a jerk about it or anything, but i just want to move on. So any advice on how to do this?
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Cutting the cord?
- Thread starter Jokerlsk
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
someone800
Don Juan
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Hey,
I think I'm in somewhat of the same situation. I met this girl at the beginning of the school year as she moved in from another state and I started hanging out with her and we became great friends and she considers me her "best guy-friend" I believe too. The thing is, there has probably been two-three times where I would find myself so attached to her that I would want to go for her. I usually conclude not to go for her, but she's really flirtatious and stuff. I don't know how this particular girl you know is, but if she's like the one I know-mind over matter.
I think I'm in somewhat of the same situation. I met this girl at the beginning of the school year as she moved in from another state and I started hanging out with her and we became great friends and she considers me her "best guy-friend" I believe too. The thing is, there has probably been two-three times where I would find myself so attached to her that I would want to go for her. I usually conclude not to go for her, but she's really flirtatious and stuff. I don't know how this particular girl you know is, but if she's like the one I know-mind over matter.
HTownLunatic
Don Juan
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Same issue here. But recently, I have just begun to stop giving her so much attention, like walking her to class and such. So now I feel less attached and less of a need to talk to her as much as I used to. I used to look forward to seeing her everyday. She has even begun to say, at least on three occasions, "We haven't talked in so long."
So long story short, don't talk to her as often as you used to and you will feel less attached.
So long story short, don't talk to her as often as you used to and you will feel less attached.
“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”
Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.
I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.
Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules. Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.
Munchking
Don Juan
I have been in a similar situation. My suggestion is to let the friendship naturally dissolve: just put less effort into spending time with her. If you chat a lot on an IM, don't sign on as often, or be busy. Just change a few small parts of your life which enable the two of you to drift apart. You'll remain on good terms, but the "close bond" will wear away over time.
antidonjuan
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if she is worth a friend, keep her as an honest friend because it's not all about flirting with women, sometimes we need some friends that are girls
if she is pretty, oh, that's a different story
if she is pretty, oh, that's a different story
antidonjuan
Banned
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yea, hb 7 is what i look for as good friends, set ur expectations high like 8.5-10 for gaming, just don't treat the 6-7s too poorly and just be friends
a hb 7 for a friend maybe, def should not be a target
a hb 7 for a friend maybe, def should not be a target
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.