Word!Befriend the thought that this will not happen and you will never hear from her ever again. I know these kinds of thoughts gives one lots of motivation because it gives one hope. There's light at the end of the tunnel.
Hope is a b*tch in this scenario.
It's good to use whatever works for you as motivation to work on yourself (as you have) and to stay away from wallowing in misery, but i suspect you still have hope that "something" will happen if and when she reaches out because of the kids. That means that your happiness will depend on someone else's actions, instead of cutting her off in your mind and come to peace with it. Which means not caring if she reaches out, not counting days, investing no thoughts in the past anymore, because you realise it's dead.
I'm not saying it's easy, but it's the place to strive for.
I was in 5 relationships in my life, dumpped from 4, being dumpee in 1. Only 1 girl reached out to me after a certain period of time, and with that one I had the shortest and least good relationship with. We're freinds now. We hang out with same people so I don't see her as anything more than she really is - a friend. No feelings towards her whatsoever.
The one I dumped never contacted me, nor have I seen her after that.
As far as my experience, ex (basically) never reach back. So I don't hold any hopes.
It does take time to leave them mentally (physically is easy) but in the end you just get tired of constant thinking and contemplating and you just move on.
It takes sometimes longer, sometimes shorter but in the end you move on without the luggage.