Critique where I fvcked up here

[Konada]

When I read this exchange it immediately reminded me of this scene from Tommy Boy:

You come off as over-eager, desperate and like you have nothing else going on in your life.

And that's just through text...how are you coming off in person?

I don't know. I'm just terrible with texting, I posted this exchange because I was very attracted to her (don't know why).

My usual exchange goes something like this:
On OLD:

Me: Hi
HB: Hi
Me: Hey how's your weekend coming along
HB: Blahblah
Me: I see. You seem like a pretty cool girl, how's tinder treating you so far?
HB: Blahblah
Me: <reply>. Anyway, let's grab a drink/coffee sometime this week. Drop me your number and I'll text you soon.

When I get the number, I text it a day later
Me: Hi its xxx from tinder
HB: Heyy
Me: What are you up to?
HB: Blahblahblah
Me: Cool, what nights are you free for a drink this week?

Even then, my closing ratio for dates from numbers is about 20%. I've been told that I needed to incorporate more flirtation and excite the girl, but now looks like I'm back at square 1. I fvcking hate this.

 

[icantgetlaid]

The good news here is that you are addressing the issues, opening yourself to criticism, and getting a ton of great feedback to incorporate into your future interactions, and you are just 22 years old. You are doing it right.

 

[Glassguy]

I don't know. I'm just terrible with texting, I posted this exchange because I was very attracted to her (don't know why).

My usual exchange goes something like this:
On OLD:

Me: Hi
HB: Hi
Me: Hey how's your weekend coming along
HB: Blahblah
Me: I see. You seem like a pretty cool girl, how's tinder treating you so far?
HB: Blahblah
Me: <reply>. Anyway, let's grab a drink/coffee sometime this week. Drop me your number and I'll text you soon.

When I get the number, I text it a day later
Me: Hi its xxx from tinder
HB: Heyy
Me: What are you up to?
HB: Blahblahblah
Me: Cool, what nights are you free for a drink this week?

Even then, my closing ratio for dates from numbers is about 20%. I've been told that I needed to incorporate more flirtation and excite the girl, but now looks like I'm back at square 1. I fvcking hate this.

I think you need something more confident and assertive in the opening.

"Hi" seems very dry and skittish. Try to gauge an opener based off something in her pics, and light sarcasm isn't a bad thing to make her qualify herself from the beginning so you aren't qualifying yourself 3 messages into it like you were originally

 

[MrOctober]

When I read this exchange it immediately reminded me of this scene from Tommy Boy:

You come off as over-eager, desperate and like you have nothing else going on in your life.

And that's just through text...how are you coming off in person?

That tommy boy scene just had me dying bro. Rip to that guy man.

 

[bigneil]

1) use of emojis is legit gay. please stop dude.

1) I have never used any emoji (except the which I need to use as people never know I'm joking)
2) I have never used a (Laugh Out Loud)
3) I have never published a selfie (even ones taken by her).

 

[JohnChops]

1) I have never used any emoji (except the which I need to use as people never know I'm joking)
2) I have never used a (Laugh Out Loud)
3) I have never published a selfie (even ones taken by her).

I'm on par with all of that as well. I'm not a selfie type guy, I like The winky because by that point, you're about to rail her anyway and lol is gay. Remove it. Agreed.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Hey how are you

is typically my opener for OLD.

 

[Bingo-Player]

Your texts are ok, concise and to the point

The problem is like 90% of the women on tinder she’s just browsing , she doesn’t actually want to date, she’s probably already got 3 or 4 real life “go to guys” which she will rotate for sex / dates / treats whatever

Tinder is somewhat fools gold , men think that a woman that’s on tinder MUST want to date or have sex

The reality is a lot of them don’t actually “want” anything they are merely on there to see how seductive they actually are and how far they can string men along ,

Don’t underestimate how much of a ego boost it is to have 50+ messages a day off guys telling you how sexy you are

I use tinder now literally just to test new openers or routines on maybe try a couple of booty calls once in blue moon but that’s it

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

The problem is like 90% of the women on tinder she’s just browsing

Precisely. This is the ultimate flaw in online dating in general; men see it as a way to meet women; women see it as a way to meet one man.

Don’t underestimate how much of a ego boost it is to have 50+ messages a day off guys telling you how sexy you are

This will never cease to baffle me. When a girl I don't find attractive show interest in me, any ego boost is ultimately extinguished by cringe. Why would any one get a boost from someone they don't even find attractive. I guess I'm looking at it too logically.

 

[sazc]

READ THIS:

Jeffst1980 said: ↑
The main thing to remember with texting is that you get FAR BETTER results by being "rude" i.e. ignoring her questions, stopping midway through conversations, taking forever to respond, or sending vague non sequitur messages. Asking her how her midterm went, etc. before she's invested in you will not make you stand out. Having absolutely piss poor texting "manners" will, however. Incorporate a little...flakiness into your game and you'll see better results.

Ha ha! That's how I found this site! because a dude was behaving like this with me and I was like "is this normal texting behavior?" so I googled it and found links to SS.

 

[nismo-4]

Too eager, too available, too much catering to her whims. Of course she'd flake.

Your text game can use a tune up.

 

[Konada]

Is this salvageable or should I chalk it up to a loss?

Plan A: Wait for her to reach out
Plan B: Send a text 'Hey' in 2 weeks time when I get back from overseas

 

[icantgetlaid]

Is this salvageable or should I chalk it up to a loss?

Plan A: Wait for her to reach out
Plan B: Send a text 'Hey' in 2 weeks time when I get back from overseas

Going no contact is not some move to save face IMO ... if your gut tells you that you might be able to shake this one loose ... go no contact for a bit then reach out again .. another request for a date (based on her response) will tell you EVERYTHING you need to know about the girl's interest level.