"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Crazy/eternal

C

CapiCrimini

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Whats up with your recent posts... they have made absoloutly no sense... mainly the Bible one and the GTA san andreas... there were a few others... is this some new type of insiders only lingo? :p ... I'm really up for ass kissing. But this time I'm totally confused as to what your saying...?WTF... maybe I'm out of it... but could you at least explain those two posts for me... or something?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

C

CapiCrimini

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I consider this forum my personal site PM box.
 
E

Eternal

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Originally posted by CapiCrimini
I consider this forum my personal site PM box.
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This is why you got no answer from me about it.
 
C

CapiCrimini

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This is why you got no answer from me about it.
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i got this one.:D

okay... fine I'll Pm you from now on.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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E

Eternal

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Originally posted by MetalFortress
And I consider you a spamming drug-addicted nutjob. I guess we're even.
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MetalFortress - 1
CapiCrimini - 0

Round 1 is now over. Go back to your corners, get a rest...And come out swinging for round 2!
 
C

CapiCrimini

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Who's MetalForce? I've created so many enemies I don't even know thier names. There all just faceless legions of hell. :( :p :mad: :rolleyes: :eek: :eek: :) :D
 
S

squirrels

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Originally posted by CapiCrimini
Who's MetalForce? I've created so many enemies I don't even know thier names. There all just faceless legions of hell. :( :p :mad: :rolleyes: :eek: :eek: :) :D
Click to expand...
You make enemies because you talk too much. :)
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

H

Hot Ice

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Originally posted by squirrels
You make enemies because you talk too much. :)
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I would read his posts if he would write something useful. ;)
 
C

CapiCrimini

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You make enemies because you talk too much.
Click to expand...
I concur, and as long as were on the subject...*mindless babble*...

I would read his posts if he would write something useful.
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useful is a subjective term as are most. I find many of my posts "useful" and "entertaining". I believe the quote is.

Laugh over life, don't cry over it.

that or

don't whistle while you drink.
 
H

Hot Ice

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useful is a subjective term as are most. I find many of my posts "useful" and "entertaining". I believe the quote is.
Click to expand...
Yeah? And I think I should be paid for posting to this crazy place.
 
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