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Conversation is getting increasingly difficult in the social media age

Xenom0rph

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Guys, if your conversation skills are lacking, just know it's not entirely your fault.

Ask yourself when was the last time you had a flirtatious conversation with a woman over the phone..... I'm willing to bet it was a long while ago....

The last time I had a flirtatious phone conversation was probably around 2013......

That's because around 2014 smartphones were becoming more affordable and everybody had one - from middle school kids to illegal immigrants - everybody had a smartphone and everybody preferred texting over phone conversations....

Now we're living in the social media age where 70% of all social interactions are digital...... people are no longer accustomed to interacting with each other in person anymore....

This means that both men AND women possess poor conversation skills these days.

But as a man, society dictates that the onus falls on your shoulders to lead and maintain the conversation. Women get a pass, and they're comfortable just sitting back and being a passenger.....

But conversation is a team effort, if she ain't contributing anything more than single word answers ("yeah" "no" "sometimes" "maybe" "idk" "not really"), then of course the conversation will be stale, but she'll blame you for being "boring".....

This is the main reason why when (on the rare occasion) a guys scores a date, the conversation inevitably feels like a job interview because neither side knows how to relax and speak naturally - it's just a barrage of questions and one-word answers, and both sides feel awkward.

Truthfully though, if we were to strip away a woman's beauty and observe her in an objective manner, we would see that a lot of women are pretty Godd@mn boring as well.....


I rarely meet a woman that has anything interesting to say or have any humor or have any interesting life experiences.....

Most women in their 20s, 30s and 40s talk about the same childish bullsh!t that high school kids talk about - it's nothing but gossiping, bragging about what they bought, or complaining....

Guys, if you're on date and the conversation runs stale, don't beat yourself up over it...... it's not entirely your fault....
 
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Lookatu

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I think it can go both ways. Both males and females don't know how to converse, especially the younger generations.

I consider myself a great conversationalist and have a nack to get anyone talking and opening up to me. It is this advantage I'm able to have good texting game and get them out on dates. When on dates, the conversations is "so effortless and flows and is natural" (that's what they all tell me) that I have no problems getting 2nd dates majority of the time.

Conversations are two way streets but it's a lot easier to get them to talk if you are able to identify things that turn them on. On the other hand, narcissists that are guys always wanna talk about themselves so you have that problem as well.
 

jaymbrs

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Yep. It's at the point where cold approaching a woman turns awkward because the woman just flat out doesn't know how to respond to it anymore. I've had much success back in the early to mid 2000s cold approaching. Now it's not the norm.
 

Lynx nkaf

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Guys, if your conversation skills are lacking, just know it's not entirely your fault.

Ask yourself when was the last time you had a flirtatious conversation with a woman over the phone..... I'm willing to bet it was a long while ago....

The last time I had a flirtatious phone conversation was probably around 2013......

That's because around 2014 smartphones were becoming more affordable and everybody had one - from middle school kids to illegal immigrants - everybody had a smartphone and everybody preferred texting over phone conversations....

Now we're living in the social media age where 70% of all social interactions are digital...... people are no longer accustomed to interacting with each other in person anymore....

This means that both men AND women possess poor conversation skills these days.

But as a man, society dictates that the onus falls on your shoulders to lead and maintain the conversation. Women get a pass, and they're comfortable just sitting back and being a passenger.....

But conversation is a team effort, if she ain't contributing anything more than single word answers ("yeah" "no" "sometimes" "maybe" "idk" "not really"), then of course the conversation will be stale, but she'll blame you for being "boring".....

This is the main reason why when (on the rare occasion) a guys scores a date, the conversation inevitably feels like a job interview because neither side knows how to relax and speak naturally - it's just a barrage of questions and one-word answers, and both sides feel awkward.

Truthfully though, if we were to strip away a woman's beauty and observe her in an objective manner, we would see that a lot of women are pretty Godd@mn boring as well.....


I rarely meet a woman that has anything interesting to say or have any humor or have any interesting life experiences.....

Most women in their 20s, 30s and 40s talk about the same childish bullsh!t that high school kids talk about - it's nothing but gossiping, bragging about what they bought, or complaining....

Guys, if you're on date and the conversation runs stale, don't beat yourself up over it...... it's not entirely your fault....
I agree.
I found this video by Mystery helpful
 

AttackFormation

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I agree.
I found this video by Mystery helpful
What do you mean "you found it helpful"? Aren't you a woman? your posts are weird as shyt.
 

Lynx nkaf

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What do you mean "you found it helpful"? Aren't you a woman? your posts are weird as shyt.
Watch the video and learn.

Aren't you the member with that mutant thread a while back? I thought I mentioned some of the things I've been exposed to and may be doomed to experience in my life.

What's wrong with your memory?
Don't tell me mine is better than yours.

na, that was @backseatjuan 's mutant thread, my bad
 
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Who Dares Win

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I hate talking at the phone, short audios and messages are much better.

Regarding conversations with women its no the medium the problem but the content, most women nowadays have no interest beside social media, sushi, travels and celebrities.
 

BackInTheGame78

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Guys, if your conversation skills are lacking, just know it's not entirely your fault.

Ask yourself when was the last time you had a flirtatious conversation with a woman over the phone..... I'm willing to bet it was a long while ago....

The last time I had a flirtatious phone conversation was probably around 2013......

That's because around 2014 smartphones were becoming more affordable and everybody had one - from middle school kids to illegal immigrants - everybody had a smartphone and everybody preferred texting over phone conversations....

Now we're living in the social media age where 70% of all social interactions are digital...... people are no longer accustomed to interacting with each other in person anymore....

This means that both men AND women possess poor conversation skills these days.

But as a man, society dictates that the onus falls on your shoulders to lead and maintain the conversation. Women get a pass, and they're comfortable just sitting back and being a passenger.....

But conversation is a team effort, if she ain't contributing anything more than single word answers ("yeah" "no" "sometimes" "maybe" "idk" "not really"), then of course the conversation will be stale, but she'll blame you for being "boring".....

This is the main reason why when (on the rare occasion) a guys scores a date, the conversation inevitably feels like a job interview because neither side knows how to relax and speak naturally - it's just a barrage of questions and one-word answers, and both sides feel awkward.

Truthfully though, if we were to strip away a woman's beauty and observe her in an objective manner, we would see that a lot of women are pretty Godd@mn boring as well.....


I rarely meet a woman that has anything interesting to say or have any humor or have any interesting life experiences.....

Most women in their 20s, 30s and 40s talk about the same childish bullsh!t that high school kids talk about - it's nothing but gossiping, bragging about what they bought, or complaining....

Guys, if you're on date and the conversation runs stale, don't beat yourself up over it...... it's not entirely your fault....
The last time I had a flirtatious convo over the phone was like 2 days ago. It IS your fault if the convo is going poorly because as the man it is your job to lead. And yes that includes the convo. Change topics. Cut threads. Don't just sit around and let her ramble on about whatever she wants.

The key is to be interesting but also actually WANT to get to know the other person. If you allow a woman to co trol the convo she will likely steer towards safe topics and then you are pretty much doomed. Part of this is her seeing how you are able to lead the convo. So yes, this is a test from her and I promise if you just go along with it you will fail.

Most people have boring conversations. If that is you then I would advise you to start incorporating content from the below links. Just like anything else conversational ability is a skill that you can work on and improve and in many cases it will pay off hugely for you. To sit here and try to say its not your fault if you don't have good conversations is complete and utter BS. You are the man. Lead the conversation to where you want it to go and then use YOUR conversational skills you have worked on and improved upon to make is interesting.

But also you need to know how to turn the convo sexual in some way...after we have been talking for a while one of my favorites to ask is "So...what is better, 50 Shades the book or the movie?". I assume they have seen or read it and it almost never fails to be right...then you can start broadening the sexual talk from that.

Also time distortion is another powerful way for her to form a connection with you because it makes it seem like she has known you forever. Bring her back to her early childhood with a question like "So, what did you want to be when you were growing up as a little girl" and then take her into a future state with something like "So where do you see yourself 5 years from now? What do you want to be doing?" Etc...

If you need good topics of conversation or things to talk about I highly recommend these:






 
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corrector

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Last time I had a conversation was earlier in the month with a lady from University. It just "clicks" on my mind whenever I'm ready to talk with anyone in particular. I don't know what mechanism it is. It is like an invisible current. Most of the time I'm not in the mood or feel too guarded, or don't feel I can relate socially. But when that mood or current hits then it happens.
 

Xenom0rph

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The last time I had a conversation with a women was last night when I was talking to one of my coworkers via Skype.....

It was a fun, light-hearted conversation about work related issues and also casual banter........but it wasn't flirtation or had any sexual tension....

Some of you guys aren't understanding the meaning of this thread, I'm referring to a flirtatious conversation with obvious sexual interest from both parties.... I'm not referring to casual conversations with females peers.....

I'm finding that people are seriously lacking conversational skills in the dating arena. It seems like people are only to be able to engage in courtship dialogue through texting....

....which is why when they're actually on the date the conversation is usually awkward as fvck.....

The last time I had a meaningful flirtatious phone conversation with a woman was around 2013.

These days, the phone conversations I have with a sex interest are usually short and straight to the point and doesn't last more than 3 minutes....

....virtually all flirtatious dialogue I have with a sex interest is done through texting, and it's usually because that's how women prefer it these days....

Which is why most men and women these days can't seem to have a relaxed conversation when they're on a date....
 
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Xenom0rph

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I control my own destiny.

For me, that means no social media and forcing women to meet me in person. I politely tell them not to text me. The constant digital communication is why relationships are so bad these days.
I think 50 and Justin said it best:

"Ayo, I'm tired of using technology
...why don't you sit down on top of me...."


Sometimes I get tired of using technology as well and would prefer to have a normal in-person interaction.....
 

BackInTheGame78

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The last time I had a conversation with a women was last night when I was talking to one of my coworkers via Skype.....

It was a fun, light-hearted conversation about work related issues and also casual banter........but it wasn't flirtation or had any sexual tension....

Some of you guys aren't understanding the meaning of this thread, I'm referring to a flirtatious conversation with obvious sexual interest from both parties.... I'm not referring to casual conversations with females peers.....

I'm finding that people are seriously lacking conversational skills in the dating arena. It seems like people are only to be able to engage in courtship dialogue through texting....

....which is why when they're actually on the date the conversation is usually awkward as fvck.....

The last time I had a meaningful flirtatious phone conversation with a woman was around 2013.

These days, the phone conversations I have with a sex interest are usually short and straight to the point and doesn't last more than 3 minutes....

....virtually all flirtatious dialogue I have with a sex interest is done through texting, and it's usually because that's how women prefer it these days....

Which is why most men and women these days can't seem to have a relaxed conversation when they're on a date....
I do understand the topic of this thread and that is why I posted what I posted above. Because this is an area that can be worked on by men. Just saying you can't do it or you aren't good at it is no different than a 300 lb dude saying he can't get in shape.

Anyone can become good with enough practice and the proper mindset.
 

Trojan3000

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I never have a problem with conversation in person. When it comes to texting, i dont have the motivation or energy for it.. that **** is boring as hell. I had my days of texting and i remember all u needed to seduce a woman was text her brains out with the right type of content, usually stuff ud do to her sexually, and basically why they never met ag uy like you etc.. used to have girl's with boyfriends meet up with me and everything because my text game was so strong. then again, they have to be attracted to you too

but yeah, i mean the one thing i have a problem with sometime is that i end up talking too much about myself.. because afterall, im ****in full of myself .. and most bitches are boring anyways, they're usually just attractive but **** talkers, more fun to actually do stuff with, like bang.
 

OnYourTerms

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I control my own destiny.

For me, that means no social media and forcing women to meet me in person. I politely tell them not to text me. The constant digital communication is why relationships are so bad these days.
How old are you if you don't mind me asking?
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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Guys, if you're on date and the conversation runs stale, don't beat yourself up over it...... it's not entirely your fault....
I can't suggest enough about pickup and game in a era of autism. Girl boss. Feminism. Wants children one day: age 40.

Brb guys, raising down syndrome children because mommy is on the carousel in her best yrs.

Wait wut?

There's a recent YouTube video of a supposed ex rsd intern trashing Tyler. He argues Infield is a highlight reel. NO ****. the guy argues that the amount of approach to pull ratio is astronomical. Shocking. You mean game is sales. Dude isn't James Tusk or giga Chad or Tyrone. The fact that you can not be that and after enough approach YOU PULL. Buddy is a better public speaker than player. The metric is on him pulling regardless of his aesthetic.

The game changer is a background in sales as a young man. I highly recommend this after the pandemic. Social equity is a great skill that most men are lacking.

Couple in adequate pickup and game with red pill, knowing female nature and hypergamy, it is comply or bye. It's not a good time these days but wtf is the alternative? Dev a algorithm for game time be it apps or pickup. You see the same thing again and again.

She doesn't have a do over. The wall is undefeated.
 

samspade

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I screen for women who are interesting and courteous, so I don't have this issue when conversing in person.

I wouldn't know about chatting on the phone because I have always found it tedious, unless it's with relatives or friends who are long distance.
 

SW15

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Guys, if your conversation skills are lacking, just know it's not entirely your fault.

This means that both men AND women possess poor conversation skills these days.
I think this is an accurate statement. Both men and women have weaker conversational skills than even in the 1990s at the tail end of the pre-internet era and the early years of the internet.

I can see a difference between my college years (2001-2005) and 2011-present.

But as a man, society dictates that the onus falls on your shoulders to lead and maintain the conversation. Women get a pass, and they're comfortable just sitting back and being a passenger.....

conversation is a team effort, if she ain't contributing anything more than single word answers ("yeah" "no" "sometimes" "maybe" "idk" "not really"), then of course the conversation will be stale, but she'll blame you for being "boring".....

This is the main reason why when (on the rare occasion) a guys scores a date, the conversation inevitably feels like a job interview because neither side knows how to relax and speak naturally - it's just a barrage of questions and one-word answers, and both sides feel awkward.
You're quite correct that women get a cultural pass on their social skills and seem very comfortable being passive and "passenger-like" in their social circle. I've noticed that since the onset of the 2010s, women have seemed way more passive in their conversations. I don't get asked nearly as many questions on early stages than I would think that I would get asked.

This is why conversations have a tendency to feel like job interviews on dates for many men. I've experienced this and I think this is a common male experience now. Even with a better than average female conversationalist, I still perceive that I do far more of the conversational heavy lifting in the early days. With that said, there are women who are talkative and fun. There is the occasional exception of a woman who can carry a conversation in the early days. The exceptions prove the rule.

These "job interview" type dates are more of a result of bad initial screening. Due to the use of tech, a lot of bad dates happen that likely would never have happened in the pre-internet era. I think people got worse at screening for initial interest in the website era of dating (2000s) and this trend continued into the swipe app era (2010s-present). It is really difficult to screen for initial interest behind an electronic screen. In the 2000s and early 2010s, some people would have phone calls with their dating website matches prior to dates. I even remember doing this in that era. I understood why people did it in that era, but in my experience, a phone call prior to a first date didn't really reduce "1 date, no sex, no second date" type interactions. Around 2010 or so, I noticed that it was getting more and more difficult to get potential matches on the phone and with it not reducing bad first date outcomes, I stopped doing those.

It's possible to set up video type chats with swipe app matches and they might be helpful. I think they would be more helpful than the solely voice call. If you're going to go through the effort of having video calls after swiping, texting on the apps, and sending texts to each other's phones, you might as well solely approach in the real world.

Approaching in the real world has always been a better option than the 2000s era tech path (dating website messaging + phone call) or 2010s/2020s era path (swipe app interaction with optional phone/video call).

Truthfully though, if we were to strip away a woman's beauty and observe her in an objective manner, we would see that a lot of women are pretty Godd@mn boring as well.....

I rarely meet a woman that has anything interesting to say or have any humor or have any interesting life experiences.....
If women were judged in the same way of men, most women would be classified as boring. Due to the appeal of their breasts, butts, and vaginas, their personal attributes tend to get overlooked.

Most women don't have interesting hobbies. Few women do something as awesome as even having a sport hobby like playing tennis, volleyball, or soccer. The typical woman met in a bar or on a swipe app isn't playing rec league or pickup volleyball games. Some might go to fitness classes. Considering the overweight/obese rate, not women are exercising enough. I've mainly avoided going on dates with overweight/obese women, which is good. The typical average/slightly above woman from the bar or swipe app (think someone you'd rate as 5.5-6.5) isn't a fitness fanatic. She's likely some not pudgy woman who likes some bullshiit streaming service programming, bull**** YouTube/TikTok, or bullshiit cable/satellite TV network content. She might even love being social on Twitter/Instagram/LinkedIn.

At least a woman who plays sand or indoor volleyball recreationally has something going for her.

Ask yourself when was the last time you had a flirtatious conversation with a woman over the phone..... I'm willing to bet it was a long while ago....

The last time I had a flirtatious phone conversation was probably around 2013......
If you're dating women who were born in 1981/1982 or later, it is somewhat difficult to get them on a phone call. I remember being critical of 1980s born Millennial women for what appeared to be voice conversation phobic behavior by the 2010-2013 era. This trend hasn't changed and has likely gotten worse. There are now 15-20 years of adult births out there who aren't as inclined towards voice conversation.

Phone calls have gotten rarer and rarer until the "officially dating/relationship stage". I still have fewer phone calls with women in a relationship stage than I would like to have.

I've even found it difficult to get some of my male friends born in the 1980s on telephone calls. I find that annoying.

That's because around 2014 smartphones were becoming more affordable and everybody had one - from middle school kids to illegal immigrants - everybody had a smartphone and everybody preferred texting over phone conversations....
This happened earlier than 2014.

By 2009-2011, it was essentially impossible to approach White women with bachelor's degrees or higher in their 20s in person with a flip phone. In 2009-2011, I was 26-28, so that's who I was approaching then. You could work around this at that time solely getting numbers on dating websites. The White women I referenced previously were starting to want to text more and that's difficult to do on flip phones. It's not impossible. I was doing some texting on a flip phone circa 2010 but I had to get a smartphone to competitive with doing in-person approaches. I learned around then that women were judgemental about the phone you owned.

There was also some interaction in the mid-2010s where I had an iPhone but not the newest model at the time and some woman sneered at me. That seemed to be more of an exception than the rule. Since the early 2010s, as long as you have some sort of smartphone, you're going to be ok more than not when you collect her number from an in-person approach. However, there are some women who own iPhones who look down on men with Android phones. This is ridiculous because some Androids (mainly Samsungs) are really solid phones.

In the USA, prettier White women with bachelor's degrees or higher tend to own iPhones far more than Androids. I can't recall a time where I saw a higher level looking White woman with a bachelor's degree or higher owning an Android. If you happen to encounter an attractive woman with an Android, she's likely non-White. The only non-White women I tend to approach are Hispanics. An attractive Hispanic woman in the USA might have an Android model but I think even more of them are women with iPhones.

Now we're living in the social media age where 70% of all social interactions are digital...... people are no longer accustomed to interacting with each other in person anymore....
Most interactions are digital. Most interactions aren't worth doing in-person. This was a trend that pre-dated the pandemic but the pandemic accentuated it from early 2020-at least early 2022.

Most social events aren't worth in-person time anyway. I find that I want to devote my in-person stuff to interactions that either involve sex or could lead to sex. General social circle get togethers with friends that won't lead to sex aren't all that interesting to me. A lot of my social circle stinks these days, with 5 pregnancy announcements since mid-2021 and the long term trend of my social circle towards houses in the suburbs, dog, and children.

There aren't a lot of 30 or 35+ guys who live lives where they are either typically unattached, in shorter term uncommittted relationships, or in shorter to medium term committed relationships. I am spending more and more lately socializing with the few 35+ men I already know who tend to avoid the typical blue pill, normie path.
 
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