"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Contact after first date

Y

yogy

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So I had a date yesterday with this girl.Everything went ok.
Now I have a question.I know that you "shouldn't" contact her for 2-3, whatever days after first date,BUT we have each others MSN id's and we are at the same time online (when she/I am at work).So how to not contact her if she can see me online.
I know that I can stay invisible or whatever,but it's like hiding from her (and it is way more AFC then just to speak with her ,right? ).
So is it that wrong to just speak to her when we see each other online (even everyday till the next date)????And if it is :confused: what should I do ?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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The Duke

The Duke

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No it's not like hiding. She'll never know when you are actually there or not.

Talking to her everyday will decrease some of that mystery and excitement that will carry you through your next date.

So if you want to mess it up, go ahead.
 
Y

yogy

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She'll never know when you are actually there or not.
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The thing is that I'll know that I am hiding from some girl to seem like the ultimate "ALPHA" and have lot of stuff to do :cheer: ....
 
C

CORVETTE06

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dont go onto msn. use a different name.

rite now ur in a lose lose situation

i dont trade screen names

if u hide from her, its creepy

if u talk to her, you lose value and become one of her girlfriends
 
T

tsmith2334

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yogy said:
So how to not contact her if she can see me online.
I know that I can stay invisible or whatever,but it's like hiding from her (and it is way more AFC then just to speak with her ,right? ).
So is it that wrong to just speak to her when we see each other online (even everyday till the next date)????And if it is :confused: what should I do ?
Click to expand...
Am I missing something here?? Just don't contact her for a few days! What's so hard about that?

Just because you have her MSN handle doesn't mean you need to speak with her on it.

If she does initiate a conversation with you, then apparently the date went over well. If you don't hear from her no sweat, just contact her in two or three days, whatever.

No need to hide from her, it makes you look like even more of a challenge if your online and not speaking to her. What's so hard about that?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Y

yogy

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Just because you have her MSN handle doesn't mean you need to speak with her on it.

If she does initiate a conversation with you, then apparently the date went over well. If you don't hear from her no sweat, just contact her in two or three days, whatever.
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That what I was thinking too,but just wanted some opinion. :kick:
 
A

Answers

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yogy said:
So I had a date yesterday with this girl.Everything went ok.
Now I have a question.I know that you "shouldn't" contact her for 2-3, whatever days after first date,BUT we have each others MSN id's and we are at the same time online (when she/I am at work).So how to not contact her if she can see me online.
I know that I can stay invisible or whatever,but it's like hiding from her (and it is way more AFC then just to speak with her ,right? ).
So is it that wrong to just speak to her when we see each other online (even everyday till the next date)????And if it is :confused: what should I do ?
Click to expand...
Firstly using MSN there is an 'appear offline' option.

The reason they say not to make contact for a few days after is to appear like you're not needy etc. I'm not so sure this is a good idea. It may depend on how you both got on with one another.

I'd like to hear some opposing views...
 
A

Andromax

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DjDan said:
no girl would go out with you if she didn't wanna fuck you.
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Thats not always the case.. haha.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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