"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Constant delays?

T

TheNewGuy

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Alright so I've been working on this girl for a while.

Last tuesday: We were supposed to hang out, she called to ask what time to come over. Turns out I had a hair cut, so she said she'd come over Friday.

Friday: I call to ask her what time she's coming over, she says her friend is still over her house. She then says we'll hang out monday.

Monday (today): I call her to see what she's doing. She says she's in my neighborhood, driving by. I go "Oh ok, so what time are you coming over?" She tells me she'll call me back. This was 30 minutes ago.

I'm pretty pissed, I think I'm just gonna next her. I just think it's weird how she's been saying she'll come over on day X, but then for some reason can't. Why would she say she'll come over if she intends not to?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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M

Mr_rogers

Senior Don Juan
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TheNewGuy said:
Alright so I've been working on this girl for a while.

Last tuesday: We were supposed to hang out, she called to ask what time to come over. Turns out I had a hair cut, so she said she'd come over Friday.

Friday: I call to ask her what time she's coming over, she says her friend is still over her house. She then says we'll hang out monday.

Monday (today): I call her to see what she's doing. She says she's in my neighborhood, driving by. I go "Oh ok, so what time are you coming over?" She tells me she'll call me back. This was 30 minutes ago.

I'm pretty pissed, I think I'm just gonna next her. I just think it's weird how she's been saying she'll come over on day X, but then for some reason can't. Why would she say she'll come over if she intends not to?
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She's one of those girls who is trying too hard to not shatter your self esteem by being nice, and saying that she'll do things with you and not showing up, rather than just telling you that she isn't interested. Next her.
 
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Damian

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Tactic #1 is to simply distance yourself and wait for her to close the gap. Don't initiate reactions with her unless it is to "call her back" or something of the sort for a week. If she reinitiates and tries to get together, take her off of probation status. Don't get too frustrated about flakiness unless it becomes a chronic (more than two weeks) condition. You just have to accept that sometimes, there are schedule conflicts that are just unavoidable.

-Damian
 
T

TheNewGuy

Master Don Juan
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Mr_rogers said:
She's one of those girls is trying too hard to not shatter your self esteem by being nice, and saying that she'll do things with you and not showing up, rather than just telling you that she isn't interested. Next her.
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Ouch. Truth hurts...


Thanks though
 
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