"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Confusing Situation: High Interest Girl

bonesmahoney

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Kinda redundant to say "high interest" as this is pretty much always the case, but maybe she's more shy or sensitive.

I met this girl at a mixer, we chatted for a very long period of time. I didn't bother to get her number, enjoying the convo, forgetting about logistics. Couple of ****blocks entered the picture, evening ended.

I see her again about a month later. She sees me from opposite end of room. She has this look of extreme pleasure staring at me. I catch her, may have embarrassed her. I go find her later, give her a hug but she is kinda frigid and cold. Turns out she was probably on a "date" with some rando.

So yeah, I guess I answered my own question. I didn't show high enough interest or work out logistics early on, she went for some low level safe guy on a date and felt embarrassed she was still jonesing over me in front of him.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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EyeBRollin

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There is nothing confusing about this.

OP, you made a huge mistake. Always ask for the phone number. There are no excuses. Don’t speculate about anything regarding women if you didn’t complete that first step. If you actually do see her again, ask for her number. This is game 101.
 

bat soup

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This shows that you shouldn't wait too long to get contact details, because you never know when someone is going to come and interrupt the conversation. In the worst case scenario have cards ready to hand out if you suddenly have to leave - it´s not the smoothest way, but if she has high enough interest it won´t matter and she´ll call or message you.

A month later who knows what the situation was, but women change their minds every 5 minutes so after a month...
 

BackInTheGame78

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Failing to do something that will allow you to get to step 1 with a woman(aka contact her in some way) when you have the opportunity causes you to end of in this situation.

The problem many guys have is twofold.

1) Not recognizing an opportunity when it presents itself
2) Not taking advantage of an opportunity when they do recognize it.

This situation would be #2. You recognized the opportunity but you didn't take advantage of it. Always assume if you don't take advantage of an opportunity when it's there that you won't get another chance.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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bonesmahoney

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Actually, I did run into her again a couple of weeks after that. She was sitting alone at a park. She was on her phone and seemed to be in a very serious mood. I literally walked right past her. I wasn't even sure if it was her.

She was seated right near the area I usually work out at so I went to my usual spot. A moment later, she approached me, still on her phone(?). I chatted her up briefly, but she was kinda spaced out, just staring, not saying anything, then after a minute or so she just walked off.

I was like WTF? Strange, strange chick.
 
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