Confidence DOESN'T attract women

[Scrumtulescence]

Confidence is about not second-guessing you first instincts in every facet of your life, and not having a fear of acting on them. It should be pretty obvious why that is an attractive trait in anybody.

 

[oakraiderz2]

Ok then. Dont be confident, second guess yourself, hesitate, wait for other people to take initiative and live a blissfull live without the fear of directly failing...sounds b*tchin.

 

[xdreamz]

yea. let's just be unconfident in ourselves.. let's just be insecure about everything. better yet, let us perceive ourselves as low individuals not worthy of anybody's attention. .. confidence

 

[rakishness]

"Confidence is a great trait to have.....no doubt. It is important that all of us act with courage in all we do. BUT......You can have all the courage in the WORLD...if a women "percieves" another man who is a COWARD as more superior than you....she will choose the other man.

Is this a terrible thing....no....remember attraction is not a choice."


I said confidence is a great trait to have. I never said confidence is a bad thing.

 

[PRMoon]

Confidence is still the key.

Not saying you can't be shy or a coward and still achieve good standing with women but that road is far far more rocky then seeing through your interactions with women from start to finish with a successful outcome. Obviously it's a trial an error scenerio. There will be plenty of times where you fail to get where you want to go, but look at the most successful buisnessmen and rulers in history. The common trait they have is that they were confident that the choices and decisions they were making were the right ones. If they fell on their face, they didn't sink into a pit of depression. They went over what went wrong, theorised and alternative course and tried another route...with confidence that this one would get them where they needed to be.

Fortune favors the bold and bold people are confident in their abilties to achieve and have faith in their tenacity to win. Without confidence you'll be on the sideline picking off the scraps from others.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Confidence is a great trait to have.....no doubt. It is important that all of us act with courage in all we do. BUT......You can have all the courage in the WORLD...if a women "percieves" another man who is a COWARD as more superior than you....she will choose the other man.

Is this a terrible thing....no....remember attraction is not a choice.

And what if she does? A guy who is authentically self assured will shrug it off with no repercussions and will merrily go on with his life. He knows that allowing a woman's actions to dictate his well being is not a good thing.

 

[rakishness]

Listen Guys.....Everybody is insecure about something. Even movie stars and athletes. Those guys know that if they were not celebrities(and had money) their sex appeal would PLUMMET. You don't think they know that? BUT....it doesn't matter because in society athletes and celebrities are seen as SUPERIOR. And attraction is all about "percieved" superiority. So even though those guys know what would happen without all the fame...and are insecure about it....they still get LAID....ALOT. I thought everybody already knew this.

 

[drjekyll]

Listen Guys.....Everybody is insecure about something. Even movie stars and athletes. Those guys know that if they were not celebrities(and had money) their sex appeal would PLUMMET. You don't think they know that? BUT....it doesn't matter because in society athletes and celebrities are seen as SUPERIOR. And attraction is all about "percieved" superiority. So even though those guys know what would happen without all the fame...and are insecure about it....they still get LAID....ALOT. I thought everybody already knew this.

Ok dude, you really need to clarify this.

What do you mean?

You talk about superiority - what kind of superiority?

You talk about athletes and movie stars with sex appeal - if they had no money their sex appeal would plummet.

Who? Honestly, Rakishness, who, exactly? Sex appeal and cash are entirely distinct phenomena. I am flat broke. Without being a **** about it, it is extremely rare for me not to pull a hot chick on a night out if I want to do that. Extremely rare. I actually can't remember the last time this happened. Seriously.

Dude, - I don't think I can name one person, not one, who was successful with women without the skill of confident self-expression.

I honestly have not met anyone who has developed abilities with women without the development of that trait.

Ok - this Videogame testing player. Ok, fine. I'll talk about him. Just hope he doesn't read this. I'll put it in a new thread.

 

[manchild]

I think, some of you guys don't have a grasp of what it means to confident, or what confidence is. You can't just wake up one day and decide that ur going to be a confindent male or confindent in a certain area of ur life. It doesn't work that way. Confindence comes from being successful at something, whether it be sports, school or with women. It takes time to be successful, so it takes time to build confindence. That way when ur confident around a women, it isn't an act, its real because you know what ur capable. You've been there before and trust me she'll notice it.

 

[drjekyll]

Confidence is the luxury of those who know they are strong enough to cope with the consequences of audacity.

 

[rakishness]

Attraction (like power) is about appearing "larger", "better", "grander" then others. To a women....you are either SUPEERIOR or INFERIOR. Your next question is..... what do women see as INFERIOR or SUPERIOR? Ans:It varies from women to women with a few exceptions. Example: Men "percieve" women who are attractive as SUPERIOR and ugly women as INFERIOR. For reasons I don't have to explain.
Example: I saw a true life episode the other day...it was about staten island girls. And a women said she prefered a guy with a staten island guy type of look. Big muscles, tan body, spikey hair etc. This women "percieves" that look as SUPERIOR and other guys "INFERIOR".
But it is not all about looks
Example: I don't know if any of you guys have been through college...it is no secret sorority girls love frat boys and athletes. Do some sorority girls date guys who are not on a sports team or not in a frat when they are in college..OFCOURSE. But that is rare. Sorority girls "percieve" frat boys and "athletes" as SUPERIOR to the rest of the guys at school.

I think it is great that you can go to a club and get HOT women without money. The women you are getting "percieve" you as SUPERIOR. But if you were in a environment with say playboy playmates and members of the Miami Heats basketball team....the babes would FLOCK to the athletes regardless of your level of your confidence.

 

[drjekyll]

It's fascinating to me to hear stuff like this.

This is not true.

I know what you're thinking, you're thinking - yes, jekyll, yes it is.

It isn't.

Really.

There are two entirely distinct psychologies to the human mind. One is genuine, and looks to make connections. One is manipulative, and looks to gain power.

You can pull consistently by taking one or other of these things to a high level.

You can't do both, for a variety of reasons I won't go into now. Essentially, they hamper each other.

The crazy thing is that these worlds exist entirely coherently in and of themselves.

If your self worth is low, you'll automatically see the whole world in terms of manipulation, power, superiority and inferiority - in terms of relative value.

If your self worth is high, you'll automatically see the whole world in terms of connection, opportunity, challenges, honesty and integrity.

Rakishness, all I can tell you is that the world you see around you is not the only one. It really isn't. You may not believe me. You may think I'm lying.

I can pull very, very well. I never play power games. It never occurs. Ever.

Really.

Moreover, if someone is attempting to appear superior, I can obliterate them by transcending the fakeness of their percieved superiority with the reality of the connections I make.

Now, you are right inasmuch as you can be a manipulator and pull women. Really hot ones.

But if you do, you're letting go of the possibility that you'll ever be of value yourself.

There is another way.

And in that other way, confidence is pivotal.

 

[rakishness]

OH NO....I don't want you guys thinking I'm some power hungry mad man. I really am not. I don't believe in manipulating anybody. Power and attraction are realated....but...people don't want to admit this because wanting power is percieved as amoral.
I believe on approaching women with honesty.I believe in being direct and honest with women when you sarging. People who are bold are more powerful them people who are not. That doesn't make them amoral. Having courage is not an evil thing.

The words have posted in this thread....everybody already knows in the back of their head....but are are too dellusional to admit to themselves.

This thread was not ment to discourage anybody....in fact everybody should be encouraged knowing that women will like you or dislike for reasons that have nothing to do with your level of confidence.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Confidence is the luxury of those who know they are strong enough to cope with the consequences of audacity.

:rockon: :rockon: :rockon:

And you don't need a ton of past successes to make you feel confident. You aren't born with success, you gain it by experience. Aligning your confidence with experiences is setting yourself up to being afraid of failure.

 

[manchild]

:rockon: :rockon: :rockon:

And you don't need a ton of past successes to make you feel confident. You aren't born with success, you gain it by experience. Aligning your confidence with experiences is setting yourself up to being afraid of failure.

confindence that isnt based on anything is false confindence

 

[Babnik]

I think, some of you guys don't have a grasp of what it means to confident, or what confidence is. You can't just wake up one day and decide that ur going to be a confindent male or confindent in a certain area of ur life. It doesn't work that way. Confindence comes from being successful at something, whether it be sports, school or with women. It takes time to be successful, so it takes time to build confindence. That way when ur confident around a women, it isn't an act, its real because you know what ur capable. You've been there before and trust me she'll notice it.

What if all your past experiences were bad? How can you try again with confidence if experiences were bad?

If they were bad then you were proven to be IN-capable, right? So, how do you convince yourself otherwise?

 

[PRMoon]

Okay I'm starting to see a trend here. You keep describing a particular nitche for people that will label them as superior. Rock Star, Actor, Pro Athelete, Fraternity brother. This is all good and well with the exception of frat boy, i'd say you'd have little or no chance if you were to go head to head against the other groups because they have celebrity status so obviously they're plastered all over the media. However honestly how many times will you be competeing against someone of that status? I live in an area saturated by celebrities in our nightlife and I never have to compete with them. I still get girls when leonardo decaprio is in the house. These people make up like 1 percent of the population and can only occupy so much space

The point is if you're confidant and you're among everybody else, the confident ones typically come out ahead. There are not that many "superior" or "high society" people in the world so why even bother worrrying about something like that? Even if you are rich, if you're not recognizeable then that same standard doesn't even apply to you. One of the girls i'm seeing regularly gets rich guys giving her stuff all the time and she still only wants to hang out with me after work. It wasn't my status or anything, I was just being my confident and "Sexy" self (according to her) and now she's hooked.

 

[manchild]

What if all your past experiences were bad? How can you try again with confidence if experiences were bad?

If they were bad then you were proven to be IN-capable, right? So, how do you convince yourself otherwise?

let me put it like this for example ur trying to see what ur max bench press is, but u've never lifted weights before. u want to try 300lbs, because u a naturally strong guy, but there's no way u can be confindent that u can lift this weight. now u definitely might have the courage to attempt it, but courage is not confidence.

If u continously fail at something, u cant be confident that the next time u try it u will succeed.

 

[comic_relief]

who cares if it didn't attract women (it sure as hell does), it is so important that you should develop it anyways.

comic_relief

 

[Ripper]

It's fascinating to me to hear stuff like this.

This is not true.

I know what you're thinking, you're thinking - yes, jekyll, yes it is.

It isn't.

Really.

There are two entirely distinct psychologies to the human mind. One is genuine, and looks to make connections. One is manipulative, and looks to gain power.

You can pull consistently by taking one or other of these things to a high level.

You can't do both, for a variety of reasons I won't go into now. Essentially, they hamper each other.

The crazy thing is that these worlds exist entirely coherently in and of themselves.

If your self worth is low, you'll automatically see the whole world in terms of manipulation, power, superiority and inferiority - in terms of relative value.

If your self worth is high, you'll automatically see the whole world in terms of connection, opportunity, challenges, honesty and integrity.

Rakishness, all I can tell you is that the world you see around you is not the only one. It really isn't. You may not believe me. You may think I'm lying.

I can pull very, very well. I never play power games. It never occurs. Ever.

Really.

Moreover, if someone is attempting to appear superior, I can obliterate them by transcending the fakeness of their percieved superiority with the reality of the connections I make.

Now, you are right inasmuch as you can be a manipulator and pull women. Really hot ones.

But if you do, you're letting go of the possibility that you'll ever be of value yourself.

There is another way.

And in that other way, confidence is pivotal.

Absolutely spot on. This is very perceptive.