"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Condom Q

search1ng

Master Don Juan
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I'm Going away for a few days, meeting up with a female friend i haven't seen in awhile. Anyway, where do you guys carry Condoms on your person? I've heard wallet is bad, i don't think the Hotel or w/e will have them stocked and I'm not taking my car.

Some insight would be much appreciated, thanks.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Lion

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LOL use you imagination man, if you are going away aren't you taking a bag? Put it in your sock, between your cheeks.... maybe swallow it?!!!!
 

search1ng

Master Don Juan
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oh yeah... LOL, moment of brain death. Too used to leaving it at the house/car.
 
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search1ng

Master Don Juan
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Good idea! My rectum. I forgot about that!

Oh yeah! while i'm at it you can come over and help widen my ass-hole with this pink rubber dildo. Then we can all sing '99 red balloons' and have a gay circle jerk into a cup and the first one to shoot will have to drink it all!
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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speakeasy

Master Don Juan
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I put mine in my wallet despite warnings. Before I bust, I always take one last look down there to make sure it's still on and that it's not ripped. It's always a good idea to take one last look no matter what just to be on the safe side.
 

amoka

Master Don Juan
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It is only bad to put it in your wallet if you put your wallet in your back pocket.
 

speakeasy

Master Don Juan
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Well, if you're getting enough ass, they shouldn't be sitting in your wallet for very long. :)
 
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