Cold approach/day game in 2022?

[ilyoTheHorrid]

This is NOT a theoretical question and is aimed ONLY at men who ACTUALLY do it consistently:

There used to be 100s youtube gurus, especially the RSD kind that were paddling this "cold approach is easy and cool" bull****.

What is your thought on what is working today?
How did cold approach change in the last 5-10 years, especially in the day-to-day environment and not party environment?

Thanx

 

[mikedee]

This is NOT a theoretical question and is aimed ONLY at men who ACTUALLY do it consistently:

There used to be 100s youtube gurus, especially the RSD kind that were paddling this "cold approach is easy and cool" bull****.

What is your thought on what is working today?
How did cold approach change in the last 5-10 years, especially in the day-to-day environment and not party environment?

Thanx

I'm in my mid-thirties, I started cold-approaching when I was a teen. Cold-approach has not changed (they way we do it) but the perception of society did change. I feel that now, if you don't want to be seen as a creep/harassment you have to be tight. When I say tight it means good looking, tall and experienced. If the woman doesn't find you attractive she will perceive it as harassment, but on the opposite she may thank you because you made her day (in case she wasn't interested) or will be neutral.

What has changed is that now getting a phone number has no value at all. 10 years ago, it meant that the girl had a minimum of interest, a flake was possible, but less likely to happen. Now it's a number game, you need to approach consistently (2-3 girls everyday) and the most important is not to get offended or take it personal when she doesn't reply your first text, flake or ghost you. You delete the number and move on.

I've also noticed that a lot of girls give their instagram, it's a way for them to screen your social value and have new followers (receive validation). When they propose instagram, I tell them I don't use instagram and ask for their whatsapp, or Telegram.

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

Been cold approaching consistently in the recent months but I thought I should give some background into why a lot of these "gurus" stopped. The "gurus" were mostly full of crap and teaching things that could get men into some serious trouble. One famous case is when Julien from RSD harassed women in Japan, bragged about it, got banned from various countries, and had to defend himself on CNN. It's no mystery now as to why RSD has rebranded as some BS motivational speaker nonsense. A few videos from JMLUV talk about what a scam a lot of these pickup companies were.

Then you have situations like the Eaton Mall in Toronto where PUAs are getting in the news for all the wrong reasons, making anyone who does cold approach look bad.

Unfortunately, it has not stopped. These sorts of creepy spammy guys still exist, we have a ton of them here in Miami. I have seen certain places turn women defensive because a horde of PUAs just happen to love daygaming there during certain hours. The women tend to walk faster, be more alert, and make less eye contact. Miami has been overrun by dudes who consume garbage PUA content and RSD used to run so much of their bootcamps here too.

However, one way I think daygame has changed is that the gap between the rich and the poor has become even bigger.

I know a guy who has been daygaming for a decade in Miami. What he has told me is that so many weird, spammy, and socially unaware dudes daygame that when you are one of the very few who is socially calibrated and not spammy, you stick out. Women actually reward you for not invading their personal space too much, not being pushy, and not being annoying. When I have had my good days in game, I have found this to be true. If you can give a genuine compliment and not come off as a pickup scammer, you do stick out.

Let's just say that I have seen a lot of bad game being done. I have seen a lot of dudes run game and not have an idea of what they were doing. I have seen a ton of guys do game that were just weird, odd, and didn't have the right personality/mindset/character to survive in the game itself.

 

[Cloudtopsun2100]

Been cold approaching consistently in the recent months but I thought I should give some background into why a lot of these "gurus" stopped. The "gurus" were mostly full of crap and teaching things that could get men into some serious trouble. One famous case is when Julien from RSD harassed women in Japan, bragged about it, got banned from various countries, and had to defend himself on CNN. It's no mystery now as to why RSD has rebranded as some BS motivational speaker nonsense. A few videos from JMLUV talk about what a scam a lot of these pickup companies were.

Then you have situations like the Eaton Mall in Toronto where PUAs are getting in the news for all the wrong reasons, making anyone who does cold approach look bad.

Unfortunately, it has not stopped. These sorts of creepy spammy guys still exist, we have a ton of them here in Miami. I have seen certain places turn women defensive because a horde of PUAs just happen to love daygaming there during certain hours. The women tend to walk faster, be more alert, and make less eye contact. Miami has been overrun by dudes who consume garbage PUA content and RSD used to run so much of their bootcamps here too.

However, one way I think daygame has changed is that the gap between the rich and the poor has become even bigger.

I know a guy who has been daygaming for a decade in Miami. What he has told me is that so many weird, spammy, and socially unaware dudes daygame that when you are one of the very few who is socially calibrated and not spammy, you stick out. Women actually reward you for not invading their personal space too much, not being pushy, and not being annoying. When I have had my good days in game, I have found this to be true. If you can give a genuine compliment and not come off as a pickup scammer, you do stick out.

Let's just say that I have seen a lot of bad game being done. I have seen a lot of dudes run game and not have an idea of what they were doing. I have seen a ton of guys do game that were just weird, odd, and didn't have the right personality/mindset/character to survive in the game itself.

I used to love daygaming and still have good friends in the game. Now, they are pretty burnt out which is what happens when you game from age 18-36/40 without any breathers via long term relationships. Yes, the number back in the day was an indicator of interest for sure, now with all the static around in terms of an overabundance of digital options, the key is likely to be so good that you can pull a SDL or have the shiniest instagram/snapchat account.

 

[f(x)]

I think part of the skill is in making the interaction organic and not seem like some sort of scripted pua routine.

Determining the appropriate moment to begin a conversation comes with experience.

A few things I look for: does she linger nearby, has she made eye contact and smiled, is there a common experience we can talk about (waiting in a long line, etc)?

Another thing I look for is if she is shopping without a cart or basket. To me this indicates her visit to the store isn’t too important and she’ll be more receptive to conversation.

As long as you’re not regurgitating sketchy material found online, the worst that will happen is she will probably just ignore you and hope you get the point.

The only time I was yelled at was when I was drunk and buying beer at 7:00 am. I tried to make conversation with the lady behind me in line. Probably not a good look, tbh.

Dressing up like a clown and invading personal space unexpectedly will probably not have good results.

I was at Target recently and I noticed a petite blonde lingering…I told her I was looking for breath strips but couldn’t find them and did she know where they were?

Imagine my surprise when this woman who was not an employee went out of her way trying to find them for me. I left without asking for a number, but she seemed disappointed I cut the interaction short.

 

[SW15]

What is your thought on what is working today?
How did cold approach change in the last 5-10 years, especially in the day-to-day environment and not party environment?

Two of the biggest changes in non-bar approaching in the last 5-10 years are earbuds and pets. Getting attention and having a 5 minute conversation is getting more and more challenging.

Earbuds have grown in popularity for the last 15-20 years. When I was in college (2001-05), I only saw earbuds in the student gym with the top tier women. By the early 2010s, a very large majority of women were wearing earbuds on the general gym floor. I started going to fitness classes to work around the earbud problem in the early 2010s, though I had heard of men going to yoga classes to pick up women as far back as the mid-2000s.

Millennial women and early Gen Z women often have pets with them and that can block or help approaches. There have been times I've been out walking a path and seen a woman picking up dog crap as I am passing by and would like to approach. Earbuds are so common in parks and on paths even when women aren't out with a dog so that makes outdoor approaching more difficult in terms of actually getting attention and not annoying the fucck out of someone.

 

[anonymous12345]

Earbuds

I can confirm this frustration but sometimes I've pretty much thought "what the heck" and approached anyway by waving or something retarded like that. In those cases I haven't been met by hostility, but at least in one case positivity. It's easy to read into the earbuds that it's some kind of hostility or intentional blocking of suavers, but not necessarily. At least in my current city it seems girls are so oblivious to random social interactions/day game that they go by their day oblivious, it's really just music/pod cast in their ears. Not necessarily more complicated than that.

(But let's not talk about my statistics, currently.)

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Starting a conversation in an organic way is one of the most underrated skills there is.

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

Millennial women and early Gen Z women often have pets with them and that can block or help approaches. There have been times I've been out walking a path and seen a woman picking up dog crap as I am passing by and would like to approach. Earbuds are so common in parks and on paths even when women aren't out with a dog so that makes outdoor approaching more difficult in terms of actually getting attention and not annoying the fucck out of someone.

Here is a line I use with pets, especially dogs.

"Is he friendly?"

The way she reacts to that lets me know whether or not she wants to approach. If she says the dog is friendly then I comment on the breed but right after that, I end up turning that into a direct opener. Like I immediately transition from that to complementing her on something she is wearing and tease her. I might joke about my tease and say "hope he doesn't bite me for my joke".