Coffee dates

[Travel memoir21]

I'm a laidback dude at heart and I have two best friends in the states who are both Latinos and they're good Coffee Buddies of mine to chat up to and vent about my life and situations or talk and have a good Philosophical Discussion with. Having somebody to talk to like that is very healthy to get the cobwebs out whether it's a pastor or a priest or a therapist. As far as Coffee dates are concerned I can picture myself doing it with much attractive older women in their mid to late 30s such as myself. Nothing more than I love to do than banter and have a laidback, casual, fun conversations with someone who is their early to mid 20s or something, just have a lattae at a cool cloudy day and talk about her pop culture musical taste that I'm not all too familiar with lol ...dude those are good moments at a Coffee shop.

 

[SW15]

I don't like coffee dates. I typically don't do coffee dates. The only time when I might do a coffee date is if I am doing a bookstore approach and I manage to do an instantaneous date in the coffee shop located inside a bookstore. Some bookstore locations have coffee shops set up inside of them.

I'm not much of a coffee drinker, nor would I want to drink coffee on a weeknight evening (when a first date is most likely to occur) even if I were more of a coffee drinker.

The primary reason why I avoid coffee dates is that it's difficult to create sexual tension in them. I It's very difficult to physically escalate and set up a first kiss in a coffee shop. I'm trying to create a sexual vibe on my dates and have a woman associate sex appeal with me.

The environment in nearly any coffee shop isn't sexual at all. What typically happens on a coffee date is a neutral to slightly pleasant time without a romantic connection. Without a romantic connection, there's no second date and the interaction ends. Women are not motivated to see anyone again unless they have an amazing time on a first date. The threshold for getting a 2nd time has increased as female abundance has increased.

 

[Travel memoir21]

I don't like coffee dates. I typically don't do coffee dates. The only time when I might do a coffee date is if I am doing a bookstore approach and I manage to do an instantaneous date in the coffee shop located inside a bookstore. Some bookstore locations have coffee shops set up inside of them.

I'm not much of a coffee drinker, nor would I want to drink coffee on a weeknight evening (when a first date is most likely to occur) even if I were more of a coffee drinker.

The primary reason why I avoid coffee dates is that it's difficult to create sexual tension in them. I It's very difficult to physically escalate and set up a first kiss in a coffee shop. I'm trying to create a sexual vibe on my dates and have a woman associate sex appeal with me.

The environment in nearly any coffee shop isn't sexual at all. What typically happens on a coffee date is a neutral to slightly pleasant time without a romantic connection. Without a romantic connection, there's no second date and the interaction ends. Women are not motivated to see anyone again unless they have an amazing time on a first date. The threshold for getting a 2nd time has increased as female abundance has increased.

Coffee dates might work for a mature women in her late 30s and find an laidback intellectual conversation stimulating. For the younger broads, I'd probably take them dancing in a dance club or something. or As Pook recommends, action dates like shooting hoops at the park, go kart racing or mini golfing.

 

[SW15]

Coffee dates might work for a mature women in her late 30s and find an laidback intellectual conversation stimulating.

There are better first date options for a date with a mature woman in her late 30s than a coffee shop date.

For the younger broads, I'd probably take them dancing in a dance club or something. or As Pook recommends, action dates like shooting hoops at the park, go kart racing or mini golfing.

It's difficult to schedule a good activity date for a first date.

If a man is arranging a first date off of an in-person approach, this is often based off of a 3-7 minute in-person conversation. Good luck figuring out an activity date on the spot during a 3-7 minute daygame/nightgame conversation.

Planning an activity date off of a swipe app interaction is difficult as well. It's a big commitment to make with a stranger with no past in-person conversations. In the previous scenario, at least there's a 3-7 minute in-person basis. Many app interactions are solely based on text messages, as getting a woman under 40 on a phone conversation today would be a major challenge. Video chats can be arranged but if you're going to video chat women off of apps, a man might as well approach women in the real world.

 

[CoolWave1331]

I like them, they have generally been the start of other dates. It's not a rushed, loud environment, so you can sit down and talk and get to the know the other person.

I would not think too much about it, especially if the lady proposes. I went on one few weeks ago. Was a coworker who switched jobs last year. We talked her and there while we worked together, nothing serious. She asked for some people's numbers before she left and I did not think much of. After a few months she text me and say we should grab coffee sometime and catch up. So that's how it happened. While we were having coffee she volunteered that she was thinking about possibly moving to a different state out west where some of her friends were at. She said there's a good chance she will unless she meets a great guy. At end when we were leaving she gave me a hug and said we should do this again, etc. Pretty sure I have chance with this woman.

Anyway Coffee dates are easy way for women to test the waters.

 

[Clockwerk50]

Coffee dates might work for a mature women in her late 30s and find an laidback intellectual conversation stimulating. For the younger broads, I'd probably take them dancing in a dance club or something. or As Pook recommends, action dates like shooting hoops at the park, go kart racing or mini golfing.

Bro, everyone knows that, in regards to dates and women, lecturing or coming off as too intellectual or superior just makes you look pompous, and nothing kills attraction faster. That vibe will dry her up instantly.

Leave that **** for your boys.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Coffee dates are for guys who don't get laid.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Coffee dates can work if you're able to sexualize the interaction before the meet. You need good game though.

 

[SW15]

Coffee dates can work if you're able to sexualize the interaction before the meet. You need good game though.

Most men don't have strong enough game to do this. It's a higher degree of difficulty.

I agree with @BackInTheGame78 that men who go on coffee dates aren't the men who get laid. It's very difficult to sexually escalate any sort of interaction in a coffee shop. I need to escalate and create a sexual vibe in my interactions. I don't see how that's going to happen on most coffee dates with a virtual stranger.

A coffee date could be feasible off of a bookstore approach with a woman with enough free time to agree to an instantaneous date. Many bookstores have coffee shops inside of them. In my bookstore approaches, I have tried to set a bar drinks date in the future in nearly all cases where I am able to get a semi-extended bookstore conversations (3-7 minutes or so).

 

[Gamisch]

Coffee dates are for guys who don't get laid.

Interesting take....

I just wanted to reply that I saw some videos where women were complaining about coffee dates...

It's one of those things that a man with TONS of volume can get away with ( because he doesn't care). The average joe- struggle - Don Juan will :

- be fed up with the cost of dating AND getting no results

- thus he wil opt for a more low effort cheaper alternative: the coffee date. And yes, from a MAN'S pov this is fair. But women ( as usual) have a 180 different opinion...she doesn't care that you got rejected last time while paying full price and now you want a ROI...

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Interesting take....

I just wanted to reply that I saw some videos where women were complaining about coffee dates...

It's one of those things that a man with TONS of volume can get away with ( because he doesn't care). The average joe- struggle - Don Juan will :

- be fed up with the cost of dating AND getting no results

- thus he wil opt for a more low effort cheaper alternative: the coffee date. And yes, from a MAN'S pov this is fair. But women ( as usual) have a 180 different opinion...she doesn't care that you got rejected last time while paying full price and now you want a ROI...

Huh?

Nobody I know would ever want to go on a coffee date let alone suggest one.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Most men don't have strong enough game to do this. It's a higher degree of difficulty.

I agree with @BackInTheGame78 that men who go on coffee dates aren't the men who get laid. It's very difficult to sexually escalate any sort of interaction in a coffee shop. I need to escalate and create a sexual vibe in my interactions. I don't see how that's going to happen on most coffee dates with a virtual stranger.

A coffee date could be feasible off of a bookstore approach with a woman with enough free time to agree to an instantaneous date. Many bookstores have coffee shops inside of them. In my bookstore approaches, I have tried to set a bar drinks date in the future in nearly all cases where I am able to get a semi-extended bookstore conversations (3-7 minutes or so).

I'm talking in the framework of using an app for the initial approach and running sexting game prior to the coffee meet, along with comfort game so you're less of a "virtual stranger". Once this has been established, usually kino is enough to keep things going in a sexual frame.

 

[SW15]

I'm talking in the framework of using an app for the initial approach and running sexting game prior to the coffee meet, along with comfort game so you're less of a "virtual stranger". Once this has been established, usually kino is enough to keep things going in a sexual frame.

Coffee shops are not the best environment for running kino escalation.

Most men aren't running sexting game prior to a coffee meet.

A guy like this might be able to pull off a coffee meet, but a bar would still be better.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Coffee shops are not the best environment for running kino escalation.

Most men aren't running sexting game prior to a coffee meet.

A guy like this might be able to pull off a coffee meet, but a bar would still be better.

As long as you can avoid sitting directly across a large table, you should be good

 

[BadBoy89]

Coffee dates are for guys who don't get laid.

What are for guys who do get laid?

 

[BadBoy89]

As far as Coffee dates are concerned I can picture myself doing it with much attractive older women in their mid to late 30s such as myself. Nothing more than I love to do than banter and have a laidback, casual, fun conversations with someone who is their early to mid 20s or something, just have a lattae at a cool cloudy day and talk about her pop culture musical taste that I'm not all too familiar with lol ...dude those are good moments at a Coffee shop.

Yeah it’s not bad if a man has a gf or is getting laid with hot girls easily.

But if he doesn’t have a gf or wife or isn’t getting laid with hot girls consistently, sounds a little gay.

 

[Scaramouche]

Interesting take....

I just wanted to reply that I saw some videos where women were complaining about coffee dates...

It's one of those things that a man with TONS of volume can get away with ( because he doesn't care). The average joe- struggle - Don Juan will :

- be fed up with the cost of dating AND getting no results

- thus he wil opt for a more low effort cheaper alternative: the coffee date. And yes, from a MAN'S pov this is fair. But women ( as usual) have a 180 different opinion...she doesn't care that you got rejected last time while paying full price and now you want a ROI...

Hi Gamisch,
Yes that's how it is over here...Seems much like Jamaica or maybe Germany now?....In fact to have a "Coffee Buddy"is almost synonymous with having a "Friend With Benefits",these little rendezvous often finishing up in the back of a car or at nearby park LOL.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

What are for guys who do get laid?

Drinks or action dates

 

[Gamisch]

Huh?

Nobody I know would ever want to go on a coffee date let alone suggest one.

Interesting

I geuss this is a cultural difference between our continents. The idea behind the coffee date is a male invention, one that provides an cheap alternative for gauging if its even worth to invest more money in as you called it " dinner or action dates".

Doesn't have to be coffee necessarily, but rather a quick non alcoholic drink.

 

[Gamisch]

Yeah it’s not bad if a man has a gf or is getting laid with hot girls easily.

But if he doesn’t have a gf or wife or isn’t getting laid with hot girls consistently, sounds a little gay.

Tbh it might be one of the reasons why American men complain so much about the difficulty of dating American women and their entitlement.

If a man has one date per week and he has to spend 150 bucks per date it's gonna add up FAST. That's 600 he has to spend on strange women while getting nothing back..

600 bucks goes a long way given the current financial situation in both the US and Europe. Let alone poorer regions

For reference: a hooker in Europe can be 50 bucks . That's money for 3 hookers VS getting rejected by a strange woman and going home with nothing. That's what I've been hearing my entire life now..