I just moved to a new city(Toronto) and I find that girls here don't make eye contact with me at all. I don't like approaching girls unless I can get good eye contact. Where I used to live before I got alot more attention from girls, but here it seems like girls don't even notice me.
"The Kiss of Death Mistake"
You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?
Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.
One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.
Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Chicks don't hold eye contact with me?
- Thread starter BlahUgh
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
DumpaLumpagus
Don Juan
- Joined
- Sep 14, 2005
- Messages
- 91
- Reaction score
- 1
Are these just girls walking down the street or down the hallway in the mall? Or are these girls stationary and maybe sitting and reading or talking with their friends?
Keeper
Master Don Juan
You're not butt-ugly, are you? Put a pic up on www.hotornot.com
DumpaLumpagus
Don Juan
- Joined
- Sep 14, 2005
- Messages
- 91
- Reaction score
- 1
Looks may indeed play a integral part of the puzzle here. From what I've been reading in the "bible", a girl will reject you instantly based on looks alone. I think this effect is amplified when you fit a certian stereotype, such as "That goth kid" or "That Gap tool" and such. Maybe a change in wardrobe will give you better results.
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
cfajason
Don Juan
Get in shape and get a tan...that should draw some attention
Giggitty
New Member
Beyond body modification tips, I would recommend being more aware of the general expression on your face.
Perhaps being in a new environment you are lacking a bit of social confidence and projecting an "unapproachable" expression.
For me personally, I have to almost conciously remind myself to sort of smile or my default look can give the impression like I'm upset or scowling.
I recommend mirror work taking a look at yourself honestly and ask, "Would I want to come up and talk to me?".
Practice a warm friendly expression by sort of smiling with the eyes as opposed with the mouth. I notice when I do this, that frowing muscles around the forhead relax & release, creating an instant improvement in overall facial attractiveness (compared to a stressed out or sour look) and generally makes me look more relaxed, friendly, confident and more approachable based on experience.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying this is a magic bullet and get it right and women will be throwing themselves at you. But, if this is an issue it can be an instant deal breaker. If a woman makes eye contact with you and it appears to her that you are angry or in a bad mood, she will not likely respond positively if at all.
Just some thoughts to bounce off you for what it's worth. This may not be a problem for you at all, but maybe others can relate.
Good luck!
-Giggitty
Perhaps being in a new environment you are lacking a bit of social confidence and projecting an "unapproachable" expression.
For me personally, I have to almost conciously remind myself to sort of smile or my default look can give the impression like I'm upset or scowling.
I recommend mirror work taking a look at yourself honestly and ask, "Would I want to come up and talk to me?".
Practice a warm friendly expression by sort of smiling with the eyes as opposed with the mouth. I notice when I do this, that frowing muscles around the forhead relax & release, creating an instant improvement in overall facial attractiveness (compared to a stressed out or sour look) and generally makes me look more relaxed, friendly, confident and more approachable based on experience.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying this is a magic bullet and get it right and women will be throwing themselves at you. But, if this is an issue it can be an instant deal breaker. If a woman makes eye contact with you and it appears to her that you are angry or in a bad mood, she will not likely respond positively if at all.
Just some thoughts to bounce off you for what it's worth. This may not be a problem for you at all, but maybe others can relate.
Good luck!
-Giggitty
Interesting.. I'm pretty sure this affects me because in the past, I've been asked whats wrong or why I look so serious, when nothing is actually wrong. My sister has also told me that I have an almost perma serious/upset/mad look on my face. Like thats my regular face. What I'm wondering though is how much this affects other people... like if you introduce yourself to someone and they introduce back but stop there whats up? I find that girls here literally ignore me.
I'm not saying that I'm a good looking guy (because right now I honestly don't know) but if a good looking guy had a sorta perma scowl/upset look on his face would he get the same sorta thing? Or would girls ignore the look?
wolfsbaneforever
Don Juan
Theres a chill in the air, of secrets untold
Where are you from anyway ?
Yes, I would be much in your debt, if my fellow DJs (AFCs may not apply) would let me know what they think of women in Toronto, Canada.
I contest that. Its one thing to have confidence and a positvie attitude. Its another when the place one is in, is not entirely conducive.
Don't worry man, Toronto women are cold. The University of Toronto social scene is not the greatest.
Where are you from anyway ?
Yes, I would be much in your debt, if my fellow DJs (AFCs may not apply) would let me know what they think of women in Toronto, Canada.
Last edited:
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
cfajason
Don Juan
I was in Montreal last year....that place rocked!The women there where very open and easy to talk too.
wolfsbaneforever
Don Juan
Brother, I heard Texas women rock !?!
Look in regards to Toronto women, I am not saying one cannot score here. Its just hard, not easy. The women in Toronto (in general) are just not friendly. I don't hate them for it, but I will speak the truth about it.
As a litmus test, if there are any men here who say that picking up in Toronto is easy, well where do you go then ?
Now in Texas, I thought the women were aggressive. I have never been, but thats what I have heard.
Desdinova
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2004
- Messages
- 11,680
- Reaction score
- 4,876
Why are you letting lack of eye contact be a barrier in your approach? If you want to get eye contact, go fvcking talk to her!
Eye contact is not the make or break of a successful approach. It is an interest indicator, THAT'S ALL.
Eye contact is not the make or break of a successful approach. It is an interest indicator, THAT'S ALL.
Originally posted by lnghrngeek
I'm at the University of Texas at Austin and I'm having the same problem as you. It seems so far from what I've observed girls seem to only jerks or foreign guys. Oh well
Texas women are gold-diggers for the most part, so you need to make sure your dressing and grooming are up to par, these girls like a little flash.
I've seen guys go from zero to 60, just by changing their dressing and grooming habits alone.
Texas girls are big on that....
Sayno'
“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”
You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.
I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.
Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.
These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
Why not just approach them? Not every woman will make eye contact with you however, you have the ability to approach anyone. Just as long as you are DJ enough.
wolfsbaneforever
Don Juan
WTF are you talking about ? Which clubs ? The ones I have been to, the women have attitude and are cold.
Toronto women are cold. I am not saying you can't fcuk them. But in other cities (Montreal) the women are friendlier.
Man, Toronto women ARE cold. The whole damn city is made up of repressed, anal-retentive, boring people. OK I overstate things... but there's just something about the place that sucks in that "type" of person.
This isn't to say there aren't cool people there, or cool areas.
Come out to the west coast... and you'll never go back.
This isn't to say there aren't cool people there, or cool areas.
Come out to the west coast... and you'll never go back.
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.