I just moved to a new city(Toronto) and I find that girls here don't make eye contact with me at all. I don't like approaching girls unless I can get good eye contact. Where I used to live before I got alot more attention from girls, but here it seems like girls don't even notice me.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Chicks don't hold eye contact with me?
- Thread starter BlahUgh
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
DumpaLumpagus
Don Juan
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Are these just girls walking down the street or down the hallway in the mall? Or are these girls stationary and maybe sitting and reading or talking with their friends?
Keeper
Master Don Juan
You're not butt-ugly, are you? Put a pic up on www.hotornot.com
DumpaLumpagus
Don Juan
- Joined
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Looks may indeed play a integral part of the puzzle here. From what I've been reading in the "bible", a girl will reject you instantly based on looks alone. I think this effect is amplified when you fit a certian stereotype, such as "That goth kid" or "That Gap tool" and such. Maybe a change in wardrobe will give you better results.
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
cfajason
Don Juan
Get in shape and get a tan...that should draw some attention
Giggitty
New Member
Beyond body modification tips, I would recommend being more aware of the general expression on your face.
Perhaps being in a new environment you are lacking a bit of social confidence and projecting an "unapproachable" expression.
For me personally, I have to almost conciously remind myself to sort of smile or my default look can give the impression like I'm upset or scowling.
I recommend mirror work taking a look at yourself honestly and ask, "Would I want to come up and talk to me?".
Practice a warm friendly expression by sort of smiling with the eyes as opposed with the mouth. I notice when I do this, that frowing muscles around the forhead relax & release, creating an instant improvement in overall facial attractiveness (compared to a stressed out or sour look) and generally makes me look more relaxed, friendly, confident and more approachable based on experience.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying this is a magic bullet and get it right and women will be throwing themselves at you. But, if this is an issue it can be an instant deal breaker. If a woman makes eye contact with you and it appears to her that you are angry or in a bad mood, she will not likely respond positively if at all.
Just some thoughts to bounce off you for what it's worth. This may not be a problem for you at all, but maybe others can relate.
Good luck!
-Giggitty
Perhaps being in a new environment you are lacking a bit of social confidence and projecting an "unapproachable" expression.
For me personally, I have to almost conciously remind myself to sort of smile or my default look can give the impression like I'm upset or scowling.
I recommend mirror work taking a look at yourself honestly and ask, "Would I want to come up and talk to me?".
Practice a warm friendly expression by sort of smiling with the eyes as opposed with the mouth. I notice when I do this, that frowing muscles around the forhead relax & release, creating an instant improvement in overall facial attractiveness (compared to a stressed out or sour look) and generally makes me look more relaxed, friendly, confident and more approachable based on experience.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying this is a magic bullet and get it right and women will be throwing themselves at you. But, if this is an issue it can be an instant deal breaker. If a woman makes eye contact with you and it appears to her that you are angry or in a bad mood, she will not likely respond positively if at all.
Just some thoughts to bounce off you for what it's worth. This may not be a problem for you at all, but maybe others can relate.
Good luck!
-Giggitty
Interesting.. I'm pretty sure this affects me because in the past, I've been asked whats wrong or why I look so serious, when nothing is actually wrong. My sister has also told me that I have an almost perma serious/upset/mad look on my face. Like thats my regular face. What I'm wondering though is how much this affects other people... like if you introduce yourself to someone and they introduce back but stop there whats up? I find that girls here literally ignore me.
I'm not saying that I'm a good looking guy (because right now I honestly don't know) but if a good looking guy had a sorta perma scowl/upset look on his face would he get the same sorta thing? Or would girls ignore the look?
wolfsbaneforever
Don Juan
Theres a chill in the air, of secrets untold
Where are you from anyway ?
Yes, I would be much in your debt, if my fellow DJs (AFCs may not apply) would let me know what they think of women in Toronto, Canada.
I contest that. Its one thing to have confidence and a positvie attitude. Its another when the place one is in, is not entirely conducive.
Don't worry man, Toronto women are cold. The University of Toronto social scene is not the greatest.
Where are you from anyway ?
Yes, I would be much in your debt, if my fellow DJs (AFCs may not apply) would let me know what they think of women in Toronto, Canada.
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“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
cfajason
Don Juan
I was in Montreal last year....that place rocked!The women there where very open and easy to talk too.
wolfsbaneforever
Don Juan
Brother, I heard Texas women rock !?!
Look in regards to Toronto women, I am not saying one cannot score here. Its just hard, not easy. The women in Toronto (in general) are just not friendly. I don't hate them for it, but I will speak the truth about it.
As a litmus test, if there are any men here who say that picking up in Toronto is easy, well where do you go then ?
Now in Texas, I thought the women were aggressive. I have never been, but thats what I have heard.
Desdinova
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2004
- Messages
- 11,680
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- 4,876
Why are you letting lack of eye contact be a barrier in your approach? If you want to get eye contact, go fvcking talk to her!
Eye contact is not the make or break of a successful approach. It is an interest indicator, THAT'S ALL.
Eye contact is not the make or break of a successful approach. It is an interest indicator, THAT'S ALL.
Originally posted by lnghrngeek
I'm at the University of Texas at Austin and I'm having the same problem as you. It seems so far from what I've observed girls seem to only jerks or foreign guys. Oh well
Texas women are gold-diggers for the most part, so you need to make sure your dressing and grooming are up to par, these girls like a little flash.
I've seen guys go from zero to 60, just by changing their dressing and grooming habits alone.
Texas girls are big on that....
Sayno'
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
Why not just approach them? Not every woman will make eye contact with you however, you have the ability to approach anyone. Just as long as you are DJ enough.
wolfsbaneforever
Don Juan
WTF are you talking about ? Which clubs ? The ones I have been to, the women have attitude and are cold.
Toronto women are cold. I am not saying you can't fcuk them. But in other cities (Montreal) the women are friendlier.
Man, Toronto women ARE cold. The whole damn city is made up of repressed, anal-retentive, boring people. OK I overstate things... but there's just something about the place that sucks in that "type" of person.
This isn't to say there aren't cool people there, or cool areas.
Come out to the west coast... and you'll never go back.
This isn't to say there aren't cool people there, or cool areas.
Come out to the west coast... and you'll never go back.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.