"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Can't believe my anxiety levels - plz help a brother out

Why_You

Don Juan
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I've been in a relationship now for 6 months and first 4 months was great - little drama, girl was respectful of space and generally very happy. It feels like over night at the 4 month stage I got extremely serious with the girl and I know she's picked up on that and the dynamics changed. The other night she asked me about what I said to my mate about her and it was nothing major but for whatever reason my mate told her friend's boyfriend and he told his gf and then she told my gf like Chinese whispers and the actual statement changed. Now, I know I should just have a word with my mate and I told my gf why you stressing relax that's not what I said but I get very anxious in these situations, over thinking and becoming so consumed with my emotions that it fcuks me up.

Since changing my ways and becoming a man about things about 2 years ago I haven't felt like this but now I'm starting to lose my sh#t. All this social media gets to me too with my gf messaging me on fb it's like instant message and she's there and if I reply and she doesn't I get anxious. I'm just being raw with you guys here about how I feel.

I want to love her and be with her and I also know that if I really start showing my anxiety then she'll leave. I'm not terrified of her leaving me because of anxiety I'm kicking myself because I am getting so anxious.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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MOTU

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 29, 2014
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Houston, TX
Why_you, what else do you have going on in your life? Are you putting some of your passion into your work? Are you creating anything? Exercising? All of these things will focus your mind and help with the feelings of anxiety.
 
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