Ugly bastard
Don Juan
- Joined
- Feb 20, 2023
- Messages
- 67
- Reaction score
- 40
- Age
- 58
Well if you look like Brad Pitt or Leonardo Di Caprio and you’re over 30, you will have a high lay count.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
If it was easy, everyone would be doing it. However, once you get decent at it, it becomes an almost unfair advantage and doors open for you that otherwise would not have opened. The thing with social circle, and I say this as someone who has recently become involved with some elite ones, is that they are often limited in number. They are great for getting into LTRs but if you want to raise your notch count, forget about it.Approaching strangers and turning it into something meaningful is an extremely difficult path, even for men with at least adequate social skills. Only swipe apps and sending DMs are more difficult.
Most men achieve disappointing results in their efforts to approach strangers. Neil Strauss was an outlier.If it was easy, everyone would be doing it. However, once you get decent at it, it becomes an almost unfair advantage and doors open for you that otherwise would not have opened. The thing with social circle, and I say this as someone who has recently become involved with some elite ones, is that they are often limited in number. They are great for getting into LTRs but if you want to raise your notch count, forget about it.
Dating apps are great if you can afford a great photographer and know how to game the algorithm. I'd say they are the most efficient ones.
Cold approach, when done right, is the most unfair part of game out there. You can get girls most guys can't and get girls that would have been otherwise out of reach for you.
Most men achieve bad results because they are just bad at cold approach.Most men achieve disappointing results in their efforts to approach strangers. Neil Strauss was an outlier.
I think more men want some sort of longer term relationship than the player-seducer lifestyle.
Many men can live off a social circle that they built because their parents didn't move them around childhood and they stayed in the same city as adults. These guys live off whatever prospects they can get out of their social circle, marry one, and then raise children. These guys are the drone worker bees at white collar offices and occasionally blue collar workers. These aren't the guys who appear on SoSuave or other seduction forums.
There are guys that get LTRs from dating websites and apps after much frustration. Same with bar approaching too. It does happen. A lot of the guys who do that end up dropping their standards and settling because that's better than being incel or borderline incel.
It's because you need to approach an absurd amount of girls to get good at it.Most men achieve disappointing results in their efforts to approach strangers. Neil Strauss was an outlier.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Do you think it is easier to get better at app swiping and social media DMing or cold approach?Most men achieve bad results because they are just bad at cold approach.
It is and isn't a numbers game.It is a numbers game but you can rig the numbers in your favor. IMO, it is an unfair advantage once done right.
Agree. When you use the term "cold approach", I think you are referring to non-bar cold approaching. Plenty of men approach strangers in bars and nightclubs, which I call cold approach. Cold approach can be done in bars, nightclubs, at random events, non-bar retail venues, and even after fitness classes and co-ed sports league games.It's because you need to approach an absurd amount of girls to get good at it.
cold approach is lower investment than night game but higher return than online dating.