Now I know more than likely you guys would rather get the woman's number but I also know that some of you give your number to the woman. I've read about both sides of the argument and there are fair points being made to both. I read that if you get her number you won't be waiting by the phone and you'd be taking action! On the other side of the coin, Tariq Nasheed says that he prefers to give out his number and tells the woman to call at a certain time so you KNOW she's interested. He says he doesn't like getting numbers because you'd be calling her like "remember me from XYZ?" If you don't know who Tariq Nasheed is then Google him. He's got a lot of good insight on dealing with women. Before I was hip to Tariq, there was this one time a friend of mine asked me for my number. I had known her for close to three years so I gave it to her. She never did call and I didn't believe she would. Even though I knew she wouldn't, it kinda threw me for a loop because it didn't make sense to ask for a number you were never going to call. But then again you know..... I said all of this to ask which one has been more effective for you?
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
Call or be called?
- Thread starter S. Pryor
- Start date
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Ultimately it doesn't matter. It's about balance. Especially with high quality women, they want you to meet them half way or they too will never reach out due to living busy lives.S. Pryor said:Now I know more than likely you guys would rather get the woman's number but I also know that some of you give your number to the woman. I've read about both sides of the argument and there are fair points being made to both. I read that if you get her number you won't be waiting by the phone and you'd be taking action! On the other side of the coin, Tariq Nasheed says that he prefers to give out his number and tells the woman to call at a certain time so you KNOW she's interested. He says he doesn't like getting numbers because you'd be calling her like "remember me from XYZ?" If you don't know who Tariq Nasheed is then Google him. He's got a lot of good insight on dealing with women. Before I was hip to Tariq, there was this one time a friend of mine asked me for my number. I had known her for close to three years so I gave it to her. She never did call and I didn't believe she would. Even though I knew she wouldn't, it kinda threw me for a loop because it didn't make sense to ask for a number you were never going to call. But then again you know..... I said all of this to ask which one has been more effective for you?
When I exhange numbers with a girl, sometimes I'll just forget to ring her because I'm super busy and she'll end up calling me or sometimes I'll be bored and give her call and plan a meet up. Either way, it doesn't make you appear weak by calling her. It's just another form of communication. What makes a guy appear weak is calling her ALL the time. It is just like when a guy won't leave her alone in person. If you don't "need" something out of her, you'll find that the conversation will just naturally pan out and it won't matter how much you communicate with her because it won't be all the time.
DistrictofPenguins
Don Juan
- Joined
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It's EASIER if she calls you, but since most women that have just met you don't have high IL; you're going to have to make the first call. Don't give her your number when you meet her, instead get her number, wait a few days, and ring it.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
ThatMysteriousGuy
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 30, 2009
- Messages
- 275
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THIS IS ABOUT GIRLS I DON'T KNOW BUT FROM ONE OR TWO CONTACTS NOT ONES WHOM I'VE KNOWN SOCIALLY.
My problem with her calling initially is that it raises the likelyhood 10x+ that you're going to have a girl who doesn't have much of a life at all. That's not always true, but it's more often than not and raises the chances significantly that I'll end up quickly dumping her because she'll try to isolate me all to herself and that's not going to happen. I don't like to go out with girls who don't have their own life going on because I always encourage independence.
Unless you've created a very high IL yourself though your personality, the girl calling will likely be a huge problem. Those girls tend to be the ones that get a high IL all on their own because they're really needy.
Now, that doesn't include girls who call back after my initial call where there wasn't an answer. I don't leave an answering message so if she had a high IL it will get bumped a bit by her wondering what I was calling about (date? does he like me? am I missing out on something? blah blah blah). It's just fine if she calls in that case.
OTOH, if it's a girl from my social circle or ones I encounter a lot while doing my normal life stuff. We've encountered each other a bunch of times and she's comfortable with me, her calling is not problem at all. I've already had time to evaluate her personality.
Then I'm not giving up the lead, she knows me somewhat and is chasing in a healthy way.
My problem with her calling initially is that it raises the likelyhood 10x+ that you're going to have a girl who doesn't have much of a life at all. That's not always true, but it's more often than not and raises the chances significantly that I'll end up quickly dumping her because she'll try to isolate me all to herself and that's not going to happen. I don't like to go out with girls who don't have their own life going on because I always encourage independence.
Unless you've created a very high IL yourself though your personality, the girl calling will likely be a huge problem. Those girls tend to be the ones that get a high IL all on their own because they're really needy.
Now, that doesn't include girls who call back after my initial call where there wasn't an answer. I don't leave an answering message so if she had a high IL it will get bumped a bit by her wondering what I was calling about (date? does he like me? am I missing out on something? blah blah blah). It's just fine if she calls in that case.
OTOH, if it's a girl from my social circle or ones I encounter a lot while doing my normal life stuff. We've encountered each other a bunch of times and she's comfortable with me, her calling is not problem at all. I've already had time to evaluate her personality.
Then I'm not giving up the lead, she knows me somewhat and is chasing in a healthy way.
I.A.F.Y.B.
Master Don Juan
You ask for the number. You make the phone call. After you call her she will eventually know your phone number. Thus, giving her the chance to call you sometime.
So, in order for that to happen... You have to be seeing her only once or twice a week. The time you arent seeing her you are busy being a man and doing things. Which, will end up you becoming a "mystery" and a "challenge". Making her go crazy thinking about you and wanting more of you! Allowing you to hold the power and remain in control of your life.
So, in order for that to happen... You have to be seeing her only once or twice a week. The time you arent seeing her you are busy being a man and doing things. Which, will end up you becoming a "mystery" and a "challenge". Making her go crazy thinking about you and wanting more of you! Allowing you to hold the power and remain in control of your life.
The Grey Fox
Don Juan
get her number and call her a few days later, or exchange numbers leave it a few extra days and call (if she hasn't taken it into her own hands and called you first, it does happen sometimes).
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
ARrocket
Master Don Juan
Well if she calls you, that means she's interested. If you call her, she's not always interested. So obviously, the woman doing the calling "works better."
But even if she's interested, she might not call. So you're better off doing the calling.
But even if she's interested, she might not call. So you're better off doing the calling.