Bloke
Senior Don Juan
Use a banana peel
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
buying condoms
- Thread starter HSDon
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
On a semi-related note, anybody know a decent place to hide condoms while keeping them accessible/safe? Wallet was my first idea, but I found out that it wears out the condoms fast. I would just carry them in my pocket but it'd be kind awkward if they fell out during a date... which is telling a girl you planned on sleeping with her.
Rubber balloons? Don't risk that ****, what's so damn difficult about condoms?
I was a bit nervous when I bought them first, but I treasure the memory of the look on the shop attendant's face.
Honestly, what'll happen?
CALLING ALL SHOPPERS, WE HAVE A KID BUYING CONDOMS. I REPEAT, A KID BUYING CONDOMS.
I was a bit nervous when I bought them first, but I treasure the memory of the look on the shop attendant's face.
Honestly, what'll happen?
CALLING ALL SHOPPERS, WE HAVE A KID BUYING CONDOMS. I REPEAT, A KID BUYING CONDOMS.
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.