Jake-inator
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 24, 2005
- Messages
- 352
- Reaction score
- 2
let the flaming begin...
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
There are really only so many days in the week once you are balanced in your life. A woman, even one that you care about, shouldn't monopolize most of your time. For example, I spend at least one night per week visiting friends and/or family without her (maintaining other relationships is important). One night is for my job (paying for the rest of your life is also important). One or two nights are just for myself. When you get more time under your belt, I think you'll appreciate the time left over.Originally posted by frivolousz21
Im calling bull**** on this...
2 to 3 times a week in a LTR???
ok superman!
seriously.....less than 1 percent of men want to see the girl they really care for or love 2 or 3 times or less a week.
LOL. Can be very true, although once again, if he really likes you, he will go out of his way to fit you into his rotation in replacement for one of the other girls.Originally posted by MindOverMatter
2.) he's prolly seeing other girls and you're just one girl in his rotation.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
NO. NO. NO. You should respect yourself and stop worrying about how he feels and what he needs. Why do you need to do anything here, but get focused in other areas of your life: other dates, school, friends, etc.?Originally posted by Jus_LikeCandy
But, I figured by now he would have came back around. I thought him coming back meant that we would work it out.
I kind of feel I need to earn back his trust and I should be patience, but how long does this take??
I relate to how you feel. Life is hard and relationships can be the hardest aspect sometimes. But relationships shouldn't be challenging all the time. Life is not suppose to be a soap opera and should feel good even when you are not together which is not the case for you. You should get yourself involved in other areas immediately. If he is really interested in you, you should be more attractive to him as a result. Don't let him pressure you into changing in your new mode. I strongly suggest that you don't put this relationship at the top of your list of expectations.Originally posted by Jus_LikeCandy
This is going to be soooo hard to drop. I do care about him and I think that if I move on, I might miss something. Maybe it will work out.
Should I wait to see what happens for the summer....His schedule should become alot lighter, should I chill out until there??
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
People are busy because they choose to be. Much of his schedule seems negotiable. He just has you prioritized very low. Why keep going through the same cycle once you recognize it. You have tried this enough times not to revisit the same ground and waste your time. The older you get, the more you will realize this.Originally posted by Jus_LikeCandy
The funny thing is, I am extremely busy. I work full time and go to school full time. I am very busy. But, I FIND the time to do things and see people that are important to me.
I think anyone should feel this way......If he doesn't, I guess I am not that important. I am an afterthought. This, I don't like, and I will not remain in this situation. The second I am about to bounce, or he feels I am seein someone else, he will come around. We have been there before..
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
I agree 100%, this is why I am thinking of stepping away. It wasn't this bad during our period together before we split.... But, now it is unbearable. I want to see him and I have to wait until all of his other crap is done. Is he testing me...? Maybe he is....People are busy because they choose to be. Much of his schedule seems negotiable.
Any relationship that's toxic is no good for anyone: the man or the woman. You should be honest with who you date and never waste months of their and your time fuking playing games. The "game players" are immature and should realize that successful seduction comes from becoming comfortable as a man: that's what this site is about to me not just picking up women. We'll always hold the advantage in dating because women are emotional and react to us if they have interest not the other way around. Why make anyone miserable if there is no or very low interest? That's cruel and what I was responding to here. I am totally done dealing with this issue though.Originally posted by PVSSY-EATER
mISTER BIG?
DO YOU HEAR YOURSELF?
This guy is being a challenge, she LIKES THAT....she is just trying to figure out a way to trap him, what the hell.............are you guys dumb? Why the hell are you talking to this bytch, she is a girl, a girl, a GIRL!!!!!!!!! THIS SITE WILL NOT TURN TO OPRAH!! I WILL SEE TO IT!
Chicks can be Don Juans too..this site remains a mans site
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.