"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Bumped into a plate whilst approching others

wonderer

Senior Don Juan
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I bumped into a plate of mine when I was cold approaching, she didnt see it happen but convo went like this:

Her: come in for a drink with me and my friend
Me: whos your friend?
Her: its a girl dont worry not boys!
Me: It doesnt matter if its boys! we're meeting girls, call me later

I then left, she was very close to me and kino'ing me. I didnt want to seem available to her and buy into her frame. I'm now at home, havent messaged her or heard anything. I am planning on taking her out wednesday, 1 on 1, no friends.

Was this the right way to go?

edit: she is texting me now asking how I am, I havent responded yet
 
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"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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hockeyfreak79

Master Don Juan
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You care too much, it would have been better if she did see you. It's not a crime to be social.

You make it sound like she caught you doing something wrong. She's just a plate, right? Or maybe a prospect? It's probably better you left, I'm not sure why you'd think you'd lose frame. Keep the mental masterbation down, you handled it fine.
 

RangerMIke

Master Don Juan
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Women seeing you with other women is a good thing. @Fireballs is correct. Women are not men, while a man might respond negatively and aggressively to jealousy, it actually makes women nicer. If she's not quite sure about you, it actually relaxes her that you have options because she will believe you will not become a clueless creepy stalker. If she really likes you, she is going to spend more effort to get your attention.

The worst that you would get is women that completely back off and away from you because the lack confidence... you really don't want women like this anyway because they are the ones that get fat and lazy when you are in a LTR. You want a woman that is going to work for you.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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l__i__l

Don Juan
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Obviously there is no value in you tagging along on a girly afternoon with them.
No it's a great way to meet other women, which would have likely yielded more success than cold approaching on the street.
Don't pass an opportunity to infiltrate social networks.
 

BigM

Don Juan
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That is a plus in her eyes. I don't know why you think about it to post here. It's just a plate. Also no need to avoid socialization, do what you want.
 

marmel75

Master Don Juan
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Why do you care?
Why do you feel you've done something wrong?
Why do you think this is some special situation?

These are questions you need to ask yourself.
 
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