Bumble, Tinder, Hinge & dating apps are destroying America

BadBoy89

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From FaceTime and instant messaging to the plethora of social media platforms on the internet, “interconnected” has perhaps become the most fitting term to describe contemporary society. And indeed, with our ability to communicate with anyone at the click of a button, we now have more opportunities to connect than ever before. All of this considered, one question remains: Why do so manyAmericans feel more lonely now than ever?


The ultimate goal of online dating apps should be to function as a conduit in creating committed relationships, right? Wrong. The realm of online dating has become a multi-billion dollar industry — an industry that profits primarily off of user addiction, especially by keeping its users single. The way that the industry accomplishes this is twofold, relying on qualities ofgamification and what psychologist Barry Schwartz refers to as the “paradox of choice.”

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Thoughts?
 

2rings

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It all boils down to women having the phones and the dating apps. They are addicted to the apps and endless validation. That is the foundation of it all.

the ball is truly in womens courts but the apps are simply to addictive for women to give up. The problem seriously rests on all on the women using the apps.

If suddenly all phones and apps stopped working for women, everything would return to normal.
 

Stuffnu

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Social media has always been an unnatural way to interact. It’s media - not social.
Thousands of years in evolution of talking to each other in person has been replaced by 20 years of swiping or validation by the number of likes or followers (once known as popularity).
No wonder people are feeling lonely when they have to rely on apps to meet people.
They improved the ability to connect perhaps but at the expense on how to actually communicate.
 
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2rings

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All of the biggest dating apps probably share data about people and their photos.

But still, dating apps are incredibly potent addiction potential for women.


IF dating apps didn’t exist, the same men complaining today would’ve just found something else to complain about dead @$$.
good point
But the point of the topic is about dating apps. They really are designed to make everyone miserable

One example: in the past 5000 or more of my swipes, I have not had one ginger or redhead in any of my matches. None at all. Don’t you find that odd?

i think it is that algorithm. It is not okay.
 

CornbreadFed

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But the point of the topic is about dating apps. They really are designed to make everyone miserable
I’ve had a lot of success on the apps. The reason I made my point initially is because there is a lot of advice out there to succeed on the apps, but men still choose to ignore it and make excuses.
 

Ricky

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The apps probably contribute to a short relationship attention span so to speak. The monkey branching can proceed at more rapid rates and the intermittent reward of finding the next chad is a huge payoff for the dating form of gambling
 

SW15

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I think dating sucked well before the apps arrived.
You could make a case that dating was unpleasant from the mid-1960s to the mid-1990s. That was the period in between birth control/The Sexual Revolution and the launch of online dating websites (the precursor to apps). Going to the bars and doing in-person approaches in 1980 was not a lot of fun for a lot of people.
 

Ricky

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You could make a case that dating was unpleasant from the mid-1960s to the mid-1990s. That was the period in between birth control/The Sexual Revolution and the launch of online dating websites (the precursor to apps). Going to the bars and doing in-person approaches in 1980 was not a lot of fun for a lot of people.
The 80s were alot of fun but AiDS sure put the scare into alot of people.
 

CornbreadFed

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You could make a case that dating was unpleasant from the mid-1960s to the mid-1990s. That was the period in between birth control/The Sexual Revolution and the launch of online dating websites (the precursor to apps). Going to the bars and doing in-person approaches in 1980 was not a lot of fun for a lot of people.
I was in college before the apps became mainstream. You could only meet normal women through social circles or referrals. Only the same recognizable women went out to the bars and the women were brutal in general. As bad as the apps can be, it takes that social circle barrier away and gives you a shot at the normal women that don’t go out by themselves much.
 

Pierce Manhammer

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Redheads - real ones - account for less than 1% of human population. Not that weird.

All of the biggest dating apps probably share data about people and their photos.

But still, dating apps are incredibly potent addiction potential for women.



good point
But the point of the topic is about dating apps. They really are designed to make everyone miserable

One example: in the past 5000 or more of my swipes, I have not had one ginger or redhead in any of my matches. None at all. Don’t you find that odd?

i think it is that algorithm. It is not okay.
 

AttackFormation

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Like american healthcare, dating apps arent designed to provide a good service but to extract money from the users, in the dating apps' case by exploiting human psychology. But like SW15 said they are a symptom, not a cause. If dating was so great before then the apps would never have taken off, and without them itd be much harder to at least try to reach women who dont go out much and/or dont go to bars and clubs.
 

SW15

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I was in college before the apps became mainstream. You could only meet normal women through social circles or referrals. Only the same recognizable women went out to the bars and the women were brutal in general. As bad as the apps can be, it takes that social circle barrier away and gives you a shot at the normal women that don’t go out by themselves much.
By the time you were in college, dating websites like OkCupid and Plenty of Fish were de-stigmatized and mainstream.

I was in college between 2001-2005. Dating websites were moving from stigmatized to mainstream while I was in college. Most undergraduates were not on dating websites in the 2001-2005 time frame. During that time, it was mostly post-college people who used dating websites.

I think after I finished college, there was a short time where it would have been acceptable to be in college and use a dating website like OkCupid or Plenty of Fish.

Social circles and referrals make things easier for finding one girlfriend, both in college and post-college. Things get more difficult with social circle over an extended period of time if you act like a serial monogamist and don't commit to social circle facilitated girlfriends. Most social circles have a blue pill ideology towards relationships and get pissed at men who don't marry women, even if the non-marital relationships last for 1-4 years. Eventually, someone will burn through their social circle acting like a serial monogamist who doesn't marry. Player type behavior is even more frowned upon in social circles than serial monogamist behavior.

In-person approaching is always an option on college campuses and at parties at apartment complexes and off campus single family houses.
 

The Duke

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I’ve had a lot of success on the apps. The reason I made my point initially is because there is a lot of advice out there to succeed on the apps, but men still choose to ignore it and make excuses.
How do you define success?
 

Bingo-Player

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I was in college before the apps became mainstream. You could only meet normal women through social circles or referrals. Only the same recognizable women went out to the bars and the women were brutal in general. As bad as the apps can be, it takes that social circle barrier away and gives you a shot at the normal women that don’t go out by themselves much.
I've been on a handful of app dates in my time and the recurring theme I notice is that the women are nearly ALWAYS socially awkward and are on these apps for very good reason

One girl who was effectively a Femcel catfishing herself as a "normal woman" , within 10 mins I realised I had been sold down the river

After that experience I deleted all of them because I realised
"Normal women" have strong enough social circles and interpersonal skills to enable them to meet "normal men" in the real world

these are the types of women you want to seriously date and sleep with

People that are on these apps are far from normal , there is usually heavy psychological trauma, insecurity and unrealistic expectations at play
 

Bigpapa

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I've been on a handful of app dates in my time and the recurring theme I notice is that the women are nearly ALWAYS socially awkward and are on these apps for very good reason

One girl who was effectively a Femcel catfishing herself as a "normal woman" , within 10 mins I realised I had been sold down the river

After that experience I deleted all of them because I realised
"Normal women" have strong enough social circles and interpersonal skills to enable them to meet "normal men" in the real world

these are the types of women you want to seriously date and sleep with

People that are on these apps are far from normal , there is usually heavy psychological trauma, insecurity and unrealistic expectations at play
Same experience here

The only decent people on these apps most of the times are the tourists ( if you live in a very touristic place) or women who just started using ( but even those, usually come from a brake up or something most of the time )

I think that dating apps are still not a strong option for dating caliber women
 
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