"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Breaking the Ice
- Thread starter HandyAndy
- Start date
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
You have to ISOLATE first. Then talk about: her hair, her clothes, her shoes, her purse, her job, her family, her vacations, her pets, etc, etc. Get the picture?HandyAndy said:
No girl ever came home from a date complaining all they did was talk about themselves.
ISOLATE HER FIRST?? You don't know anything about this girl - her name, her phone number, hell you haven't even said HI to her yet - and you're saying Isolate her first??
I've approached quite a few women in my day and isolation was never what I was going for on the initial approach.
ARrocket
Master Don Juan
Plus, I think he's referring to girls in CLASS....a high school to be precise. Isolation just isn't gonna happen....young_gun said:
Make sure you make your presence known in class....answer questions, joke around with the kids around you....if you have a friend that sits somewhere near her, spend some time over there....and that way you can easily introduce yourself.
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Edit: DJ11, I feel more comfortable when MY friends are around, because then if I make an ass of myself, my buddy can keep the conversation flowing and the both of us dont stand around with nothing to say
"Hey there, I saw you when I walked in and wanted to introduce myself. I'm xxxx"
Direct, to the point, and simple.
How you say it is more important than what you say.
Demon Lord
Don Juan
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
and yes, it is hard. If you go have a look at the MM, you will see, it's like higher risk opener/easier transition and lower risk opener/harder transition. transition is when you go from the opener to a normal convo. that's what you need.
so more direct the approach, the easier to go on to a normal chat.
but if you are going indirect, it's pretty hard to get her to open because that depends upon how much you attract her actually.
Al: So do we have to go through this checklist?
her: What checklist?
Al: You know, this eye colour and food thing. What's your favorite food?
her: Oh, I don't really know, probably everything with meat.
Al: Thank you sooo much, finally someone who doesn't like pizza best, I must have had 10 girls with pizza this evening! I don't really know either.
her: laughing
The ice was broken then and we had a niceconvo where she did most of the talking. So I think humour and agreement is good.
(Maybe the convo doesn't sound very good, had to translate it so it might have a different effect now
)"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.