Books on Socializing

nicksaiz65

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I've read "How to Win Friends and Influence People." Worth a reread. But do you guys have any book recommendations on becoming a really social, outgoing dude? Way of the Superior Man comes to mind, but that's already on my list.
 
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Xenom0rph

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It's more efficient and economical to watch videos on YouTube about socializing than to read books on the subject...... Most books are full of fluff and filler and a waste of time.....
 

nicksaiz65

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Less books, more going out.

More books = more fvcked up.

Use ur current natural strengths in social interactions.

As time passes, other traits will be picked up naturally.

That's it.
Y'know you're right. My skills are ok but idk why they aren't top tier like some people.

I'll keep practicing until I'm the best.
 
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Apex

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It's more efficient and economical to watch videos on YouTube about socializing than to read books on the subject...... Most books are full of fluff and filler and a waste of time.....
It depends on the book, really. I opt to use videos, books, and audio. I don't limit myself to one medium. The most useful media comes from people legitimately accomplished in their field.
 

Poonani Maker

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I've read "How to Win Friends and Influence People." Worth a reread. But do you guys have any book recommendations on becoming a really social, outgoing dude? Way of the Superior Man comes to mind, but that's already on my list.
Read non-socializing books preferably pre-1970s. You'll see why movie "socialization" is the way it is and how you should act according to how everybody else thinks. The Bible has influenced people since birth either knowingly or unknowingly. I read several simultaneous reads usually 5-6 books in rotation monthly. Ordered "Gustave Le Bon, The Crowd and The Psychology of Revolution" recently to learn about "Crowd psychology" but I have to finish my other very good reads first. I'm near the end of 4 books which will free up 4 spots. It's like continual school though I don't attend university. I have my own university in my home. I decide what to read, sure many of them recommends from intelligent and value-aligned others I may watch on youtube or visit their website. I hardly EVER take advice of what to read from your everyday person you meet cause I believe that they are too wrapped up in the matrix or the blue-pill live ALL their lives to recommend anything of benefit to me. They'd recommend what's "most popular." I don't want what's most popular, I want what will make me think or think on me feet or to enable me to use my own mind and not take propaganda in it.
 

Mike32ct

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I read several simultaneous reads usually 5-6 books in rotation monthly. Ordered "Gustave Le Bon, The Crowd and The Psychology of Revolution" recently to learn about "Crowd psychology" but I have to finish my other very good reads first. I'm near the end of 4 books which will free up 4 spots.
I’ve heard of parallel reading multiple books at once. How do you go about that?

I currently only read one book at a time, but I’m trying to bookmaxx and read much more.
 

Poonani Maker

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I’ve heard of parallel reading multiple books at once. How do you go about that?

I currently only read one book at a time, but I’m trying to bookmaxx and read much more.
Because I like variety (same with women), I do that, however sometimes one book (like a race horse) will pull ahead and cause me to read it more and finish it quicker most likely, but I always finish what I start eventually. Some books are more tedious and stay in the rotation a while while others get read quicker either due to interest or easier reading/font etc. Tedious books (where you have to re-read each line sometimes cause the author is more scholarly or brilliant) make reading the side-by-side book that's easier to read even more easier to read cause you just got done reading the more slow/difficult reading. Books assist/compliment each other, and the knowledge gained from concurrent authors is exponential. You begin to see how the popular books recommended are general written by not-very-intelligent authors, and yes I've read "How to Win Friends and Influence People" and "Think and Grow Rich" and "The 4 Hour Work Week" and on and on pop book just to See what all the hubbub is about. I'm sayin I gain more from unknown/less read but "insider-recommended" works. People I admire, who actually are powerful with their construct of words to start a revolution or something via memes, I wanna know what they've read all their lives if they'll but give up that information please. I want recommends from people who have common sense and can win arguments, and stay on point or on message. I want a recommend from a person who had high security clearance and got to where he was because he was picked due to his education for one, but getting things done, or getting people elected in the end. I want recommends from people who see/saw clearly. I want craft and truth, and craft of truth. I believe that Most NY Times and like "best sellers" were picked as numba 1 well before they were even published, that they're not numba 1 by popular consent. I don't really trust ANY of the mainstream publishing houses, especially Today, maybe in the 1940s intelligent works really Were intelligent works. Today I see a bunch of Lies from the mainstream propaganda pushers.
 
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ubercat

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Aww come on millennials you're meant to be the master hackers. Books r brilliant for quick info uptake. get a PDF take it to zambar convert into a word Doc add your own notes and experiments. So take Dale Carnegie and add some of the Leil s little tricks to it. That's how my professional library is setup I take the best book on anything in my field and I had my own stuff to it. And guess what if you think some of it is fluff press delete.

Applied the same principle to online dating. Three different accounts 3 different personas stayed in character. if you haven't got at least three sides to your personality you're not a human being. Unless of course you're Spaz and start every day of world conquering by dominating your toothbrush.

+1 poonani

I tried reading my girlfriend some Damon Runyon and books from the 1940s. the English was so complex she couldn't get it. Our language has really been dumbed down.
 
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ubercat

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BTW on OP Patrick kings science of likability isn't bad add to Richard Weiss 59 seconds and you've got a lot of actionable take out.
 

taiyuu_otoko

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I've read "How to Win Friends and Influence People." Worth a reread. But do you guys have any book recommendations on becoming a really social, outgoing dude?
That's the only book you need.

Get out and get a couple months of practice.

Then re-read it.

Then get out and get a couple more months practice.

Then re-read it.

This cycle will teach more than any collection of books you could ever read in one lifetime.

Stay away from YouTube, it tricks your subconscious into thinking you're having an actual conversation with a human, which will decrease your desire to get out and have real conversations with real people.

Social media creates MASSIVE moral hazard.

Stay way at all costs.

More than the bare bones necessities (reading and studying more than you need) is a waste of time and a trick to put off the pain of social exposure and rejection.

Humans have been social and have been capable of making more people LONG before even writing was invented.

Nobody has invented anything new regarding social interactions since then.

Just a bunch of goofs profiting from people who'd rather stay safely inside than get out and get some.

EDIT: If you really want to apply Carnegie, take one of their twelve week public speaking courses. This will obliterate any social anxieties you have. It ain't cheap, but you get what you pay for.
 

speed dawg

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We have so much information now, and so many people complicate things. At the end of the day, things are fairly simple.

Social skills are all about awareness and confidence in yourself. The rest takes care of itself. Just lose your fear that others will not approve of you. INTENTIONALLY decide that you are significant and no one can break you. No one can bother you. That's the only freedom you really have, how to react to what happens to you.

If you want to influence people, it will be with your passion. If you are trying to manipulate people, then by all means, fill your head with all the garbage needed to do it. Just know there are people like me who can naturally sniff that bullcheet out.

Here's a good example. There are millions of books out there on investing. What is so complicated about 'buy low sell high'? It's not. The hard part is the execution of it. It takes balls to buy low.

Just like it takes balls to go out and feel comfortable in any social situation.

But remember, always go with your natural strengths and settings. You have to know yourself and do some self-introspection. Figure out how introverted or extroverted you are, and monitor your energy levels, figure out what drains you and what energizes you. For example, I've never been the life of the party type, and was never the alpha loud mouth, thus I was never great at picking girls up at clubs or bars. So I stay away from that scene unless I just want to go out and get drunk or whatever. I am very introverted, but when my energy is high, I can be as social as anyone, and that helps in a party setting.
 
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Bokanovsky

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Learning how to socialize by reading a book is kind of like learning how to swim by reading a book. It's not going to work.
 
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