bullethead
Don Juan
- Joined
- Dec 14, 2011
- Messages
- 79
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I just want to beat the crap out of him. (this occurred a few months ago). Any advice?
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
I have a friend who said the same thing but just like i told him and in my own experience... Is it the guys fault? I could understand if you knew the guy and he KNEW that was your GF yet still continued to try to get with her or if he was your friend, then that makes the case for breaking his arm and face but im assuming he didnt know you and you didnt know him so really, who is to blame? Your ex GF because she KNEW you were together, yet went on and let another dude get in with her. I agree with Atom Smasher, its much more her fault for cheating in the first place.bullethead said:I just want to beat the crap out of him. (this occurred a few months ago). Any advice?
It is kind of complicated. She cheated on me with him. I dumped her. He found out later that she was dating me and he dumped her. A few months later he hooks up with her again and dumps her again. So do I have an excuse to beat the crap out of him?In2theGame said:I have a friend who said the same thing but just like i told him and in my own experience... Is it the guys fault? I could understand if you knew the guy and he KNEW that was your GF yet still continued to try to get with her or if he was your friend, then that makes the case for breaking his arm and face but im assuming he didnt know you and you didnt know him so really, who is to blame? Your ex GF because she KNEW you were together, yet went on and let another dude get in with her. I agree with Atom Smasher, its much more her fault for cheating in the first place.
I'd blame myself over either of them.Atom Smasher said:I tend to blame the hor far more than the guy. Where was her loyalty to you?
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
How im reading this is you kicked her to the side because she cheated on you with the guy, then He does the same once he finds out she was with you, So basically you guys both dumped her. If you dumped her then that should be it. He probably dated her again for some azz then kicked her to the side again.bullethead said:It is kind of complicated. She cheated on me with him. I dumped her. He found out later that she was dating me and he dumped her. A few months later he hooks up with her again and dumps her again. So do I have an excuse to beat the crap out of him?
( . )( . ) said:I'd even go grab him a cold beer,.
I agree the guy is irrelevant. I agree with Atom Smasher, I blame the girl, where's her loyalty? I don't like the idea of blaming myself because why should I beat myself up just because the girl turned out to be a wh0re? Maybe I might blame myself for not being selective enough.( . )( . ) said:I'd blame myself over either of them.
1. We are in an age of unchecked hordom.
2. Hypergamy gonna hypergamy.
3. She obviously saw him as a shinier object, meaning I've dropped the ball.
4. Women don't swing to perceived lesser branches.
5. The guy? He's irrelevant.
Man, I been through exactly that as "the other man." She was staying at her mother's place, so it sure looked like she'd broken up with him.bullethead said:It is kind of complicated. She cheated on me with him. I dumped her. He found out later that she was dating me and he dumped her. A few months later he hooks up with her again and dumps her again. So do I have an excuse to beat the crap out of him?
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.