Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Birthday text from LJBF girl a few months back

dk1990S111

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 7, 2014
Messages
569
Reaction score
136
Location
Los Angeles
Got this message from a girl I was seeing a few months ago. Posted about her before, things were going good and then one night she said “the attraction was still there but she has too much going on in her life so we should just be friends”

Didn’t really talk to her much after that, she paid me to work on her car a few weeks later but after that pretty much just NC. So the other day I get this text “Hey Dk! I saw a FB notification, so I wanted to personally wish you a happy birthday! :) I hope you were able to celebrate at least a little bit today, even though it’s a Sunday lol”

Thanked her and said I hope she’s doing good. Then she says she’s actually staying out of town to get away from some drama here lol so at this point I’m definitely thinking I met her when she was freshly broken up with a bf here and the friends thing was them trying again. Now she’s right back to fighting with him and seeing if I’m still around for her.

Just a guess
 

image

"If you love women, you must read the SoSuave Guide to Women. It's fantastic!"

Mauser96

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 28, 2012
Messages
5,085
Reaction score
2,380
Got this message from a girl I was seeing a few months ago. Posted about her before, things were going good and then one night she said “the attraction was still there but she has too much going on in her life so we should just be friends”

Didn’t really talk to her much after that, she paid me to work on her car a few weeks later but after that pretty much just NC. So the other day I get this text “Hey Dk! I saw a FB notification, so I wanted to personally wish you a happy birthday! :) I hope you were able to celebrate at least a little bit today, even though it’s a Sunday lol”

Thanked her and said I hope she’s doing good. Then she says she’s actually staying out of town to get away from some drama here lol so at this point I’m definitely thinking I met her when she was freshly broken up with a bf here and the friends thing was them trying again. Now she’s right back to fighting with him and seeing if I’m still around for her.

Just a guess
I wouldn't assume anything. She may have had children problems, school problems, family problems, financial problems.

If she reaches out again, ask her out. When on the date, simply ask her what was going on before. Yes, this may kill the sexual vide, but I think it is more important to find out and protect yourself.
 

Speculator E

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 6, 2007
Messages
625
Reaction score
135
Would like that but after the LJBF talk didn’t feel like putting that out there. If she wants to catch up she has my number
It's up to you if you want to meet her. She already initiated. She's not going to do it again. That will make them look desperate.
If you want it, you have to respond.
 

Robert28

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 27, 2008
Messages
2,851
Reaction score
2,192
This is just me but I never give second chances to any girl that LJBF’s me. One chance, per woman, per lifetime. She chose to use her one chance with you and friend zone you. That’s her problem not yours. You’re a better man than me though, I wouldn’t have responded at all.
 

KindredSpiritzz

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 1, 2019
Messages
188
Reaction score
192
Location
Wisconsin
What's your question dude?
Why does there always have to be a question? Discuss meeting, dating, and attracting women with others. Ask a question or give advice. Sometimes you just want to put a tid bit or something on your mind out there for discussion without having a question per say.
 

Toddz

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 1, 2017
Messages
175
Reaction score
188
This is just me but I never give second chances to any girl that LJBF’s me. One chance, per woman, per lifetime. She chose to use her one chance with you and friend zone you. That’s her problem not yours. You’re a better man than me though, I wouldn’t have responded at all.
Spot on.

I would've just replied with one word "thanks". That would've maintained your frame and you still hold the power. By writing "Hope you are doing good" you gave both right back to her.
 

KindredSpiritzz

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 1, 2019
Messages
188
Reaction score
192
Location
Wisconsin
I would've just replied with one word "thanks". That would've maintained your frame and you still hold the power. By writing "Hope you are doing good" you gave both right back to her.
Well whats the end game here then? To me its getting laid so he left the door cracked open to that possibility and left open the chance for her to pursue if she wanted. By saying nothing sure he maintains the "power" but he aint getting laid with that attitude. I'd make her do most of the work if she wanted something more but i wouldnt close the door entirely, specially if shes hot. Doesnt hurt to respond in a friendly manner at least.
 

Toddz

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 1, 2017
Messages
175
Reaction score
188
Well whats the end game here then? To me its getting laid so he left the door cracked open to that possibility and left open the chance for her to pursue if she wanted. By saying nothing sure he maintains the "power" but he aint getting laid with that attitude. I'd make her do most of the work if she wanted something more but i wouldnt close the door entirely, specially if shes hot. Doesnt hurt to respond in a friendly manner at least.
From his stand point, maintaining dignity and self respect.

And by replying "thanks" you are being friendly. It also allows him to gauge her interest if she continues the conversation beyond that.
 
Last edited:

Robert28

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 27, 2008
Messages
2,851
Reaction score
2,192
Well whats the end game here then? To me its getting laid so he left the door cracked open to that possibility and left open the chance for her to pursue if she wanted. By saying nothing sure he maintains the "power" but he aint getting laid with that attitude. I'd make her do most of the work if she wanted something more but i wouldnt close the door entirely, specially if shes hot. Doesnt hurt to respond in a friendly manner at least.
Speaking from past experience I can tell you that leaving that “crack in the door” for possibly getting laid is a very slim to none chance. And slim just walked out the door. You have to understand when to cut your losses and flat out give up on a girl, no leaving cracks in doors, just realize “this is never going to happen”. When a girl LJBF’s you, you have a higher chance of getting struck by lightning twice on the way to cash your million dollar winning lottery ticket. I’m sure there are instances a girl has LJBF a guy and later on somehow ended up sleeping with the guy but they are so few and far between that is it really worth the effort? It’s not to me.
 

Speculator E

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 6, 2007
Messages
625
Reaction score
135
This is just me but I never give second chances to any girl that LJBF’s me. One chance, per woman, per lifetime. She chose to use her one chance with you and friend zone you. That’s her problem not yours. You’re a better man than me though, I wouldn’t have responded at all.
He doesn't have to get back together but maybe he might like to tap it one more time. You don't give 2nd chances, even if it just for sex?
 

Speculator E

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 6, 2007
Messages
625
Reaction score
135
From his stand point, maintaining dignity and self respect.

And by replying "thanks" you are being friendly. It also allows him to gauge her interest if she continues the conversation beyond that.
That's ridiculous and some girls can interpret that as an instant rejection.
 

image

Put away your credit card.

You can now read our detailed guide to women and dating for free - Right Here!

Robert28

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 27, 2008
Messages
2,851
Reaction score
2,192
He doesn't have to get back together but maybe he might like to tap it one more time. You don't give 2nd chances, even if it just for sex?
99% of the time when a woman LJBF’s you that means she’s no longer attracted to you, never really was attracted to you, or was for a short while but lost it somehow and you’ll never make her attracted to you again. You can jump through hoops and waste a lot of time HOPING to get sex from a woman that LJBF you and is going to either reject you again or you’re going to end up working doubly hard. This is experience talking, when a woman mentions friends you need to stop all hope of every being anything to her but a friend in the future. If being friends with women really worked, there’d be this revolution going on where guys and gals were friends worldwide.

my point is you can waste a lot of time with a girl that friend zoned you, or you can put all that effort into one that hasn’t friend zoned you. I know which one my effort and time will go into.
 

Speculator E

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 6, 2007
Messages
625
Reaction score
135
99% of the time when a woman LJBF’s you that means she’s no longer attracted to you, never really was attracted to you, or was for a short while but lost it somehow and you’ll never make her attracted to you again. You can jump through hoops and waste a lot of time HOPING to get sex from a woman that LJBF you and is going to either reject you again or you’re going to end up working doubly hard. This is experience talking, when a woman mentions friends you need to stop all hope of every being anything to her but a friend in the future. If being friends with women really worked, there’d be this revolution going on where guys and gals were friends worldwide.

my point is you can waste a lot of time with a girl that friend zoned you, or you can put all that effort into one that hasn’t friend zoned you. I know which one my effort and time will go into.
Oh I see. I didn't see the part where the OP mentioned he was LJBF'ed. He wasn't very cleared.
But re-read it and yeah you're right it does sound like she may be reaching out only because things are rocky with her bf.
It's up the OP to know what to do.
 

stringpuller

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 21, 2017
Messages
4,963
Reaction score
3,088
Got this message from a girl I was seeing a few months ago. Posted about her before, things were going good and then one night she said “the attraction was still there but she has too much going on in her life so we should just be friends”

Didn’t really talk to her much after that, she paid me to work on her car a few weeks later but after that pretty much just NC. So the other day I get this text “Hey Dk! I saw a FB notification, so I wanted to personally wish you a happy birthday! :) I hope you were able to celebrate at least a little bit today, even though it’s a Sunday lol”

Thanked her and said I hope she’s doing good. Then she says she’s actually staying out of town to get away from some drama here lol so at this point I’m definitely thinking I met her when she was freshly broken up with a bf here and the friends thing was them trying again. Now she’s right back to fighting with him and seeing if I’m still around for her.

Just a guess
Should have ignored her bro.
 

stringpuller

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 21, 2017
Messages
4,963
Reaction score
3,088
I met her when she was freshly broken up with a bf here and the friends thing was them trying again. Now she’s right back to fighting with him and seeing if I’m still around for her.
Theres a reason. Hes chaotic, you are "friendly" and easy.
Women love chaos. Do anything but bore them.
 
Top