"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Beyond confused and help...

SoSuaveDude

Senior Don Juan
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Okay so i know one-itis is deadly, and ill admit that im pretty sure ive caught it. There's this girl who originally initiated great interest in me two months ago. Things were going great, went out on a date, and got the make-out session. Slowly after the date, her interest began to fade. Now it seems that she has completely let me go. No initiated contact from her, and i haven't been contacting her either.

However, last week i did. The message was pretty flirty and she received it well. She called me hot and laughed at my jokes, but immediately after the convo, i realized that i just evolved the one-itis into an even more impenetrable state. She hasn't contacted me this week, and seems to mention another ex/guy on facebook (i know i should delete/unfriend her but i encounter her at church, and she didn't exactly do anything wrong). Quite frankly, i just want to get over her for my health and sanity sake.

Problem is: She goes to my church. I realistically see her every sunday, or atleast every other sunday. How can i truly move on if im continually met with her presence. Im pretty sure this girl is poisonous too... Whenever we're at church, she'll throw heated eye contact (3+ seconds) and virtually chase me around. But during the away periods, i never hear a utterance from her.

She is prob a player, and I most likely have this nasty one-itis due to my lack of numerous past experiences in dealing with women. I fell too quickly for this one, and i know many will say spin plates, but im just trying to stay focused on school, and this girl is constantly colliding with my attention and focus. I literally can't stop thinking about her multiple times throughout the day. Help! :eek:

im 18, shes 23, and i guess i should just be thankful i got to makeout with an older chick haha
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Mantis Toboggan

Master Don Juan
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Well, the only thing I can say is the reality of it. Which is, you had one date and you made out with her. And it was two months ago.

She's far from a big deal. Very far. You didn't date for a year. You didn't live together and break up. You went on one date and you made out.

So the only help I can offer is to remind you that you never lost the girl because you never had the girl.
 

SoSuaveDude

Senior Don Juan
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Mantis Toboggan said:
Well, the only thing I can say is the reality of it. Which is, you had one date and you made out with her. And it was two months ago.

She's far from a big deal. Very far. You didn't date for a year. You didn't live together and break up. You went on one date and you made out.

So the only help I can offer is to remind you that you never lost the girl because you never had the girl.
Yeah, i fell extremely hard due to lack of experience. That's why im saying this is definitely not her fault. I just don't understand why im so attached to this woman and worshiping her in particular. It's probably because in essence she's playing the push/pull, hot/cold game on me whether she's aware of it or not. Anymore advice would be appreciated, thanks...
 

RedZone

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I used to have a similar problem. I really liked this girl who was my friends sister and after things didn't work out I still had to see her.

Mind you at least you got somewhere with this chick...I didn't even come close. Looking back I was such a big afc.

What's great about life though is we are supposed to have these moments. Nobody is meant to know how to get through these situations at first. It's just part of life, but having this experience will help you grow and learn for the next time. I know I have...I'm not a Don Juan or what I like to think of a Don Juan Draper but I'm def. closer.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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oscarxp25

Don Juan
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move on and flirt with other girls while flirting with her when she is around.. DO NOT wait for her...I did that years ago and lost many great girl opportunities and life experiences
 
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